In today's fast-paced, cutthroat world of sports journalism, it has become vogue for columnists and even ordinary reporters to make predictions regarding the outcome of the events they cover.  In closely observing this phenomenon, I have learned to my surprise (and horror) that not only are these predictions occasionally inaccurate, but they are sometimes even inconsistent.  Why just yesterday, the author of one "reputable" website picked the Rays to win the forthcoming White Sox - Rays series in 4 games, while a famous local sports TV anchor picked the Sox to win in 5.  Who to believe?

We, the editorial staff of South Side Sox, generally do not participate in these sorts of mundane pursuits; our loyal paying subscribers simply expect more than a simple "one man's opinion" type of off-the-cuff analysis regarding the outcome of the games we value so highly.  However, we also recognize that, in order to remain competitive in the current dog-eat-dog environment of sports journalism, it is necessary for us to offer some views on this topic.

That is why I, your humble Junior Deputy Assistant Associate Editor, have taken it upon myself to consult with noted Predictive Statistician and Modeler, Michael J. Adair (PhD pending), of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (Skokie Campus), in order to determine whether a definitive method may exist for determining the winner of the Sox-Rays series in advance.  The following is a full, unedited transcript of that conversation:

MICHAEL J. ADAIR:  Hello?

TAEG:  Hello, is this noted Predictive Statistician and Modeler, Dr. Michael J. Adair?

MJA:  Well, yes, this is Mike Adair -- but I'm not a doctor.  Well, not yet anyway ... I'm a graduate student who is ...

TAEG (interrupting):  But you consider yourself to be a doctor, right?

MJA:  Uhhhh, well ... no.  Who in the world would ever consider himself to be a doctor if he was not in fact a doctor?  Look, who is this and what's this all ...

TAEG (interrupting again):  Close enough, science boy.  Now spill it: How do I figure out who will win the Sox-Rays series this week?

MJA (pause):  The baseball games?  Uh, look ... I don't know who you are or what you want, but I'm kinda busy right now, so ...

[NEXT 38 MINUTES OF TAPE INAUDIBLE - TAPE APPARENTLY SMEARED WITH BACON]

TAEG: ... so, you're saying that if I knew every single event that has ever occurred in the entire history of all things ever, as well as the current location, velocity, attitude and direction of evey single particle in the universe, I could definitively predict the Sox-Rays outcome?

MJA (long pause):  Well ... I mean, theoretically ... making the assumptions that we discussed regarding hard determinism ... putting aside quantum theory, and imagining ... I mean, again, strictly on a theoretical basis, that such a thing were possible, I suppose ... but look, all this is obviously ridiculous, it's like saying ...

TAEG (interrupting):  So your answer is yes.  Thanks, gotta go now, you've been a big help [hangs up].

Now, I am no fool.  I know it is impossible for any single person to determine the precise location, velocity, etc. of every single particle in the universe -- why the very concept is laughable!  But this is where you, loyal reader/contributor, can help.  I believe that between myself, the other editors and authors of this site, and you, the literally tens of readers of this fine publication, we can gather the relevant data and perform the critical analysis that has become the hallmark of SSS. 

I am therefore requesting that each of you (yes, even you, "mjthor", if that is your real name), make a mental note of the location, velocity and direction of every particle that you can observe, and email the results to me, The Actual El Guapo at WTGTD@capslockbuttonisapparentlybrokenbeyondrepair.com.  If everyone does their fair share, by gametime, we should have enough information to take a shot at this thing!