Steve Stone's 'Joke of the Day'

...better have a damn good punchline.

... The move is also having an effect on opposing teams, who are forced to reexamine their plans of attack against the White Sox hitters.

"I don’t know how to approach their lineup now," said disheartened Detroit Tigers‘ manager Jim Leyland. "Konerko was good for at least three or four double plays a game. Now we may actually have to pitch to Carlos Quentin."

All may not be as well as it seems for the Sox, however. The injury will probably move Nick Swisher from outfield to first base, which means that platinum-blond pretty boy Brian Anderson is expected to see much more time in center field.

"Oh, I’m pretty sure I can do what Paulie was doing," Anderson assured SSNN. "Well, maybe not the power production, but hitting .200 – that’s what I do, man."

3. Rick Hahn (Assistant GM, White Sox)
Hahn might be among the least-known names on this list, but that suits him fine. Hahn is comfortable working in the background, focusing on building up the White Sox while Kenny Williams takes the media heat. Hahn’s background working with agents has given him plenty of experience dealing with contracts, thereby allowing Williams to focus on the makeup of the team. The knock on Hahn is that he might not have the talent evaluation chops that others on the list do, but no one thinks that he couldn’t handle the job if he brought in a solid talent evaluator as a second-in-command. Hahn’s strengths clearly outweigh his weaknesses, and one writer I spoke with said “it’s his presence that’s most impressive. You know this guy’s in charge when you meet him, but he’s not bigger than the room.” Add in a spotless resumé that includes some top schools and a World Series ring, and it’s no wonder Hahn’s on this list—and other’s.

http://www.baseballprospectus.com/article.php?articleid=7683

’’Lou Piniella does two things better than me,’’ Sox manager Ozzie Guillen said before Tuesday night’s game against Pittsburgh. ’’Managing and eating.’’ ’’It took them three weeks to find a [body] double for Piniella,’’ Guillen said. ’’For mine, you just go to a model agency.’‘

At first glance I thought it was the Mayor. Working with Hawk sucks the life right out of ya.

but still pretty funny.

Yankees claimed RHP Oneli Perez off waivers from the Indians and optioned him to Double-A Trenton.

Perez had a nice track record as a minor league reliever entering 2008, but he’s struggled in Triple-A for both the White Sox and Indians this season. The Yankees have no shortage of better relief prospects. Jun. 18 – 5:31 pm et

Ozzie told reporters before the game that he may still consider playing Jim Thome at first base this weekend at Wrigley Field, particularly with Paulie on the DL.

“But I told Jim not to take ground balls or anything (and risk injury),” Guillen said. “It’s not like he’s going to get better in a day or two.”

i’m finding it hard to believe that ozzie won’t send thome out there to field ground balls but would put him there for a game. but whatever, we’ll see.

and everybody wish joe cowley a happy 40th birthday!

Pirates catcher Ryan Doumit has a slight concussion and will not play tonight – and probably not tomorrow either—against the Chicago White Sox.

"We’re going to give him a couple of days (off)," manager John Russell said. "If all goes well, he’ll be back (Friday) when we get home."

Doumit took three foul balls off his mask Tuesday night. He was replaced in the bottom of the seventh by Raul Chavez.

Doumit is not available even to pinch hit tonight, and likely will be off limits again Thursday.

the long winded joke and sharp punchline is all made by first dedicating it to ed farmer .