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I Don't Believe What I Just Saw

Thecheatsmoking_tiny by The Cheat on in Recaps

Baseball is a crazy game.

  • Carlos Quentin, who three days ago became the first player (in verifiable history) to be hit by a pitch in 5 consecutive games, rejoined the lineup and was almost immediately hit again, extending his own dubious record to 6 games.
  • The White Sox became just the 6th team in baseball history to hit back-to-back-to-back-to-back homers.
  • Lance Broadway had a successful major league start, despite below average stuff and a recent minor league track record that suggested such a feat would be nearly impossible.

And all of those things happened in the same game. Crazy, indeed.

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Like yesterday's article from Christopher Michaels...

…this is one of the greatest atrocities of the 20th century, ranking right up there with the Cultural Revolution, the Holocaust, and the fact that several Chinese gymnasts are underage.

You need to respect that Lance Broadway is a virtually lock for the Hall of Fame. He’s essentially Tiger Woods and Winston Churchill rolled up into one.

by BridgeportJoe on Aug 14, 2008 5:19 PM CDT   0 recs

Winston Churchill played ball? Impressive

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:27 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

He played shortstop

regards

I wish he was in my fantasy league. id bury that cocksucker- KenWo4Life

by Hawk is God on Aug 14, 2008 6:00 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Is there any other way?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 6:12 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

lol

sorry cheat ;P
I didn’t mean for everyone to call you by your first and last name, although it does sound a little superhero-ish.

"term: pussy, user: larry, count: 11

term: pussy, user: all, count: 83" - wiz

by Where Triples Go to Die on Aug 14, 2008 10:26 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

don't you remember you did this last time he wrote for hardball times and he explained that's not his real name?

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 10:44 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Nope.

I don’t remember him explaining that was not his real name. Link?

"term: pussy, user: larry, count: 11

term: pussy, user: all, count: 83" - wiz

by Where Triples Go to Die on Aug 14, 2008 10:47 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

lolz

i think it would be pretty sweet if ssh's kid and kenwo's kid had offspring together...whether you believe in nature or nurture, it wouldn’t be boring.-larry

by furby2056 on Aug 14, 2008 10:54 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

here.

http://www.southsidesox.com/2008/5/30/542922/lob#6488936

you had earlier referred to him as christopher, thinking his hardball times handle was his real name. he then referred to you as matt. i’m sure you can use the search function to find that one.

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 10:57 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

* deletes myspace account

hmm i must have logged off an never went back to read that.

"term: pussy, user: larry, count: 11

term: pussy, user: all, count: 83" - wiz

by Where Triples Go to Die on Aug 14, 2008 11:11 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

all this stuff really makes me think twice about internet anonymity.

i never really made an effort, but it seems like there is reason to.

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

by MarketMaker on Aug 15, 2008 11:42 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

So what, you don't like us watching you through the window now?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 15, 2008 12:08 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

No, no, he's still ok with that...

He just doesn’t want you to know his name.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 15, 2008 12:15 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

encouraged by young lance's recovery from the first inning and another fine bullpen performance...

nessie dominated….and piece about gavin is up….hope you all like

i think it would be pretty sweet if ssh's kid and kenwo's kid had offspring together...whether you believe in nature or nurture, it wouldn’t be boring.-larry

by furby2056 on Aug 14, 2008 5:24 PM CDT   0 recs

Just to recap.

“Such a money name for such a bad pitcher.”

“ROFL… get ready for a LOOONG day.”

" ROFL, this guy sucks…

89 MPH meatballs right over the heart of the plate."

“If Kenny didn’t put in a waiver claim for Washburn, he should be fired.”

" An out…

He won’t see too many of those today."

“2-0 Royals.”

“Nice first round draft pick, Kenny.”

" Nope…

This is an embarrasment."

“Well, assuming Broadway is an effective pitcher was your first mistake.”

" WHIP of 4.00 after one inning…

Nice."

Pitching, defense and health.

by ballyb on Aug 14, 2008 5:26 PM CDT   1 recs

SSH really needs to go back to hell.

"You know, if you stab a man in the dead of winter, steam will rise up from the wounds. Indians believed it was his soul escaping from his body." - Mikita's Manager, Glen

by omnipotent grab on Aug 14, 2008 5:28 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Are you missing a clearly?

Though I’m not his biggest fan, the dude has as much right to post on here as anyone else. I’ll agree that he shouldn’t repeat himself so often, but banishing him to hell seems a bit harsh.

Where’s the love, SSS community?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:34 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Clearly would work in place of really. SSH is fun to hate.

"You know, if you stab a man in the dead of winter, steam will rise up from the wounds. Indians believed it was his soul escaping from his body." - Mikita's Manager, Glen

by omnipotent grab on Aug 14, 2008 5:51 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

True dat

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 6:13 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Fuck the love.

when somebody is that socially bulletproof, it can be attributed to either ignorance or arrogance.

Pick one, don’t care, no love.

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 6:06 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Well, old man, I couldn't find a way to work clearly into the "Where's the love" joke

but you bring up a good point.

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 6:13 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I guess a third alternative could be

“off his meds”, but until I see the script I’m sticking with the first two.

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 6:17 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

What he said.

Coffee is for closers.

by vince_ on Aug 14, 2008 7:58 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

SSH is amuzing to me.

Although he seems like he would rather troll than say anything objectively.

"term: pussy, user: larry, count: 11

term: pussy, user: all, count: 83" - wiz

by Where Triples Go to Die on Aug 14, 2008 10:29 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Greeeeeeeeen!

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 15, 2008 9:37 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

To be fair

It is unfortunate that the Sox picked broadway as a 1st rounder if indeed it was due to his “signability” over more talented players that would demand more money. From the gameday data I’ve seen coupled with comments from others, his fastball is fringy, although his curve is sweet, so he may not have much of a career in the majors.

Also, given his piss poor numbers in AAA this year, I didn’t see many optimistic posts before the game started either.

But I think SSH’s comments are a text book example of how commenting on small sample sizes is dangerous.

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:33 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I also remember someone thinking that Clayton Richard was the second coming...

after striking out Josh Hamilton three times in his first start. And then, after three starts…

"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry

by SSH2005 on Aug 14, 2008 5:40 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Again, small sample size

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:46 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

now this i gotta see. linkplskthxbai.

somebody classified richard as the second coming for striking out hamilton three times, despite the 4 innings, 7 hits, 4 earned runs line?

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 5:47 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

even i didn't come up with that gem ;x

"term: pussy, user: larry, count: 11

term: pussy, user: all, count: 83" - wiz

by Where Triples Go to Die on Aug 14, 2008 10:34 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

linkplz

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 14, 2008 5:57 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

textbook example of something for sure

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 5:56 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

insanity? obsessive compulsive disorder?

am I missing something here?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 6:14 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

One start doesn't make him a good pitcher...

I will trust his minor league numbers over one or two starts in the MLB.

"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry

by SSH2005 on Aug 14, 2008 5:38 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

i bet royals review has already dubbed him "cy de la broadway"

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 5:58 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

They just got Sonnastined

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 6:15 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

wrecked

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 5:54 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 5:56 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 6:04 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I think...

that could be the official motto of this website. It’s not just SSH who thinks this.

by The Jerry Royster Experience on Aug 14, 2008 6:07 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

hmmm.

you don’t think most people are at least open to different ideas when provided evidence? perhaps it’s just the repetition and the repeating himself and the redundancy and the saying the same thing over and over again that has me associating it with ssh.

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 6:09 PM CDT to parent up   1 recs

Again...

SSH is not alone in this.

by The Jerry Royster Experience on Aug 14, 2008 6:13 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I see and like what you did there.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 14, 2008 6:23 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

lolz!

i think it would be pretty sweet if ssh's kid and kenwo's kid had offspring together...whether you believe in nature or nurture, it wouldn’t be boring.-larry

by furby2056 on Aug 14, 2008 6:06 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Cocaine is a hell of a drug

the line “baseball is a crazy game” made me think of that

BTW, Rick James was awesome.

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:26 PM CDT   0 recs

I've already used

“Baseball is a hell of a drug” as a recap headline

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 14, 2008 5:33 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I know, I read that recap

Are you done blowing yourself yet?

Or saving that until all of the bourbon has been consumed?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:35 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Clearly clearly clearly clearly clearly

maybe if I write it five times for punishment, next time I won’t forget?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:36 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I sincerely thought the same thing....

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 14, 2008 6:23 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

What a bunch of losers.

How do they even win a game?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:47 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Bastard Twins cock-blocked us...
Waiver claims made on Raul Ibanez and Jarrod Washburn both expired Thursday without a deal being made.
Both players will stick with the team for the rest of the season. The Tigers were the team that put in a claim on Ibanez, and Minnesota made a claim on Washburn – likely to block the White Sox, who were thought to be interested.

Source: Seattle Post-Intelligencer

I guess it’s Lance Broadway or bust.

"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry

by SSH2005 on Aug 14, 2008 5:43 PM CDT   0 recs

Well, that's Rotoworld's speculation...

I also read a rumor that the Cardinals had claimed Washburn, which would mean that no team in the A.L. tried to claim him.

"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry

by SSH2005 on Aug 14, 2008 5:44 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Or, I guess the Twins did claim him...
Winning the claim on Washburn was Minnesota, which was something of a surrprise in that the Twins weren’t thought to be in the bidding. However, they may have put in a bid to block another team from getting him.

"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry

by SSH2005 on Aug 14, 2008 5:46 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

kenny is a fucking idiot. he should have told the team to throw a few games to get ahead of the twins in the waiver order.

paging mr. poreda. paging mr. aaron poreda. your seat in the left field bullpen is ready.

by larry on Aug 14, 2008 5:47 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

the main point is that kenny is a moron and this proves it.

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 5:48 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

kenny is clearly a fucking dope for not inquiring about a player that he couldn't inquire about.

at least pick up the phone and ask about players you can’t actually acquire.

paging mr. poreda. paging mr. aaron poreda. your seat in the left field bullpen is ready.

by larry on Aug 14, 2008 5:51 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

to be fair, kenny was waiting for his phone to not ring

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 5:58 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

it's almost like kenny wants this team to fail.

"i'm gonna beat you. and then my son chris is gonna beat you. it's gonna be an old fashioned father-son beat off!"

by Toonderstrook on Aug 14, 2008 5:59 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

like some posters.

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 6:00 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Kenny Williams...

hates the White Sox and their fans.

He probably called up the Twins and asked them to make a claim on Washburn, because he doesn’t want to win.

by The Jerry Royster Experience on Aug 14, 2008 6:03 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

george bush...

doesn’t like black people

i think it would be pretty sweet if ssh's kid and kenwo's kid had offspring together...whether you believe in nature or nurture, it wouldn’t be boring.-larry

by furby2056 on Aug 14, 2008 6:10 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Nor black puppets.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 14, 2008 6:27 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

"It ain't easy bein' white...

it ain’t easy bein’ brown.
So much pressure to be bright!
I’ve got children all over town!"

by CWSKeith on Aug 14, 2008 7:05 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

wtf...

did you get out of prison?

"term: pussy, user: larry, count: 11

term: pussy, user: all, count: 83" - wiz

by Where Triples Go to Die on Aug 14, 2008 10:49 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Now THAT would be some kind of strategy

And then we could all bitch about how stupid it was to throw games when Washburn loses 3 / 6 starts and the Sox end up 1 game back.

At least it would make for an entertaining off season on SSS.

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 5:49 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

AEG raises Logic from the dead!

Church of SSSientology here we come!

Nice one, El Guano…nice one.

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 6:11 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

wrecked

In two weeks they will win 7 or 8 in a row and you all will have 10 inch boners.

by Chiburb on Aug 14, 2008 6:14 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Hey jagoff, you need to actually recommend something is you're going to say "wrecked"

Perhaps it’s past your bedtime?

;)

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 6:17 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

He is...refresh your page, dope.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 14, 2008 6:28 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Did and Doed

still didn’t see the rec at the time, although after I dropped a rec on did come up

it’s still fun calling your dad a jagoff and saying it’s past his bedtime, don’t ya think?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 14, 2008 6:32 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs