Watch the Sausages Get Made
The top of the site tells me that I have approximately 2 hours to write a recap, and, as has become SSS custom, get what might be the worst thread in the history of SSS off the front page. So, in the interest of burying the ugliness, here's your recap, to which I will be adding (in between masturbatory sessions) until the site goes dark for the night.
Limited time constraints and a general lack of focus results in a bullet point recap for you.
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The first game played Monday, which was actually April, BTW, had to be one of the most frustrating losses of the year; 12 walks leads to only 3 runs thanks to 18 men left on base, Cubs castoffs Rocky Cherry and Luis Montanez proving the winning formula in the late innings, the decision to start Horacio Ramirez over Thornton or Carrasco, a number of well-struck line drives which never seemed to find the grass between the white lines. It was just one of the most frustrating games of the year to watch. And it took nearly 3 months to complete.
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Clayton Richard turned in his second consecutive quality start, with all of the damage coming in one inning. And the damage might not have been as severe if he had a competent defense behind him. General Soreness was unable to get to bloop hit and Alexei Ramirez dropped a glove-to-hand transfer (ruled a hit) to give the O's two extra outs in the inning. I still don't know how he's getting it done, but I'm not gonna argue with the results. Keep sending him out there against the also-rans of the AL, I say.
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Joe Crede returned to the Sox lineup, and actually looked pretty good at the plate in the first game. As somebody commented that's probably because the first game was played in April. Crede lifted a deep fly to center his first at-bat, and laid out a rope to right field in his second, but both found the gloves of Orioles fielders.
Defensively, it didn't appear that Crede had any ill effects from his lingering back issues. He made a number of nice plays over the two games, though he did start hitting the ball weakly to the right side in the nightcap.
- Chris Getz was optioned to AAA in between games to make way for the curiously effective Lance Brodway. Getz will be back in 10 days, the minimum time required (barring injury) for a minor league assignment, with rosters set to expand on September 1st.
Note: Previously, there has been a loosely enforced--is anything strictly enforced around here?--policy against political posting. But, observing the generally cordial conversations which occurred during primary season, I let everything slide. I think the last thread shows why that policy should be more rigorously enforced. But enforcing rules is hard work, so I've come up with something different.
Over the next two weeks, spanning the conventions--I like to think of them as the political equivalent of SoxFest--if you should still feel the need to shout obscenities at your TV or your fellow Sox fans, you're welcome to do so in the soon-to-be-difficult-to-find previous thread. (no link) Please be so kind as to keep them out of the rest of the threads. kthnxbi.
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Eddie Guardado already paying dividends for the Twins...
Ichiro = popup
Betancourt = popup
Ibanez = popup
Twins gonna win this one with Nathan in the 9th.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on Aug 25, 2008 11:40 PM CDT 0 recs
and a leadoff double off the base of the wall
don’t they know you’re not supposed to get hits off of nathan?
by Trooper on
Aug 25, 2008 11:46 PM CDT
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Jose Lopez botched the bunt...
but he’s still battling.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 25, 2008 11:49 PM CDT
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pretty consistently lining them foul to the right too.
almost as if he blew the bunt on purpose.
by Trooper on
Aug 25, 2008 11:50 PM CDT
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A DP ties the game...
That sucks but at least it’s tied.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 25, 2008 11:53 PM CDT
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Holy shit...
Fielding error by Nick Punto.
Runners at the corners, no outs.
Is Nathan actually going to blow a save here?
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 25, 2008 11:51 PM CDT
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yes.
"that woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 25, 2008 11:53 PM CDT
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and its blown.
shittiest way possible for the M’s though.
by Trooper on
Aug 25, 2008 11:53 PM CDT
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nostradamus.
"that woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 25, 2008 11:54 PM CDT
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Did the Twins lose yet?
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 25, 2008 11:57 PM CDT
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fucking jojima k's
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 25, 2008 11:58 PM CDT
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statement true or false?: "Twins gonna win this one with Nathan in the 9th."
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 25, 2008 11:59 PM CDT
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Were you expecting him to blow it?
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:00 AM CDT
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again you fial on getting the point.
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:01 AM CDT
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haha
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:01 AM CDT
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and btw, although nathan is great and having a phenomenal season,
he’s blown 4 saves, including 2 against the mariners and 1 against the royals. so no, i was not expecting him to blow it, but i probably would have said something less certain, like, this one’s PROBABLY over or something. adverbs and modifiers rock because they can save you from looking from a know-it-all know-nothing.
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:07 AM CDT
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but ssh2005 is a real man, he stands by his words...right?
by onlysoxfaninboston on
Aug 26, 2008 7:40 AM CDT
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once again he has not covered himself in glory.
brian anderson would've caught that...
by BuehrleMan on
Aug 26, 2008 7:43 AM CDT
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he's a democrat now if that's the case
nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team
by colintj on
Aug 26, 2008 9:46 AM CDT
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No but you did say
“Twins gonna win this one with Nathan in the 9th.”
by 815Sox on
Aug 25, 2008 11:59 PM CDT
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yes everybody's favorite i was just gonna bitch about why that wasn't in the headlines!
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 25, 2008 11:56 PM CDT
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Should have been "Watch the Pansages Get Made"
Coffee is for closers.
by vince_ on
Aug 25, 2008 11:57 PM CDT
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Wait so those are real?
I thought that shit was a photoshop
by 815Sox on
Aug 25, 2008 11:57 PM CDT
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no joke.
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 25, 2008 11:58 PM CDT
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i want some now
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 25, 2008 11:58 PM CDT
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Disgusting
and people wonder why we have an obesity problem
by 815Sox on
Aug 25, 2008 11:58 PM CDT
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I'm big boned!!!!
Stuffs pansages into face. nom nom nom.
Coffee is for closers.
by vince_ on
Aug 26, 2008 12:00 AM CDT
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everyone's got their turn ons?
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:00 AM CDT
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you're not allowed on this site anymore if you think they are disgusting
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:01 AM CDT
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btw, i hooked up the laptop to the tv to watch this
although this game is only SD, it looks at least as good as any normal SD broadcast. anyone know if they have HD feeds ever?
by Trooper on Aug 25, 2008 11:57 PM CDT 0 recs
dude i can't stop laughing at that phelps video
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:00 AM CDT
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is it just me, or does phelps totally sounds like a lewd act?
by Trooper on
Aug 26, 2008 12:01 AM CDT
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Colin has intimate knowledge of phelpsing
Coffee is for closers.
by vince_ on
Aug 26, 2008 12:03 AM CDT
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it goes too far by the end
but the splashing bit is brilliant.
by shaftr on
Aug 26, 2008 12:03 AM CDT
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cheat!!!! i love you lots for the pansages in the recap
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Aug 26, 2008 12:03 AM CDT 0 recs
Not as good as pansages, but still goofy

Coffee is for closers.
by vince_ on Aug 26, 2008 12:05 AM CDT 0 recs
R.A. Dickey coming in for the Mariners?
Enjoy your win, Twinkies.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on Aug 26, 2008 12:13 AM CDT 0 recs
Can Putz not throw more than 10 pitches an outing or something?
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:14 AM CDT
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fuckdamnit cockballs shitbag
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:15 AM CDT
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for the m's in their current state, there may be a limit to how far they'll go for the "integrity" of the game
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:15 AM CDT
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you'd think they'd want the twins to lose.
nothing good about a team with half your payroll having twice your win total.
by Trooper on
Aug 26, 2008 12:16 AM CDT
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and looking at his gamelog, he threw 3, 14, 21, 26, 6, and 46 pitches in his last six appearances.
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:16 AM CDT
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My God...
Dickey-Mo gets out of the inning after only three batters!
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:17 AM CDT
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he struck out buscher!
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:18 AM CDT
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a scoreless inning from runs allowed dickey...holy shit
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:20 AM CDT
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Betancourt, Ibanez, and Beltre coming up...
Just walk them off.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on Aug 26, 2008 12:20 AM CDT 0 recs
betancourt grounds out....
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:21 AM CDT
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"runs allowed" a far better nickname than what mlb homepage is referring to mike pelfrey as...
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on Aug 26, 2008 12:23 AM CDT 0 recs
I like that the URL for this page is contains "watch-the-sausages-get-mad"
Warning: Angry Sausages Ahead
AIM: SouthSideCheat
by The Cheat on Aug 26, 2008 12:24 AM CDT 0 recs
i only wish i had heeded that warning in the past.
You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.
by MarketMaker on
Aug 26, 2008 12:36 AM CDT
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One out walk to Ibanez...
Beltre up…
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on Aug 26, 2008 12:24 AM CDT 0 recs
raaaaaaaauuuuuuuullllllll gets on for us
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Aug 26, 2008 12:24 AM CDT 0 recs
BELTRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on Aug 26, 2008 12:24 AM CDT 0 recs
stop the presses! twins not invincible! who knew?!?
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on Aug 26, 2008 12:24 AM CDT 0 recs
Yeah, let's act like we knew that Nathan would blow the save after the fact.
Pretty lame.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:25 AM CDT
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you just don't get it. of course we didn't know, one way or the other. only you ever claim to.
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:26 AM CDT
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Lame is counting this as an automatic win for the Twins
Which is what you did.
Coffee is for closers.
by vince_ on
Aug 26, 2008 12:26 AM CDT
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The Mariners are pathetic...
I just figured they would mail it in in the 9th.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:27 AM CDT
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just like last month against the twins in seattle, right?
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:29 AM CDT
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twins need to win tomorrow and wednesday afternoon to finish .500 in seattle; currently 1-3.
"people don't commit murder on credit."
by Toonderstrook on
Aug 26, 2008 12:37 AM CDT
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Over/under on when you'll eventually learn:
June 8, 2021.
Chip, chip, chip, chip.
Sox Machine
by Sox Machine on
Aug 26, 2008 12:44 AM CDT
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Teach me, oh wise one...

"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:47 AM CDT
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Hey everybody! That's what I look like!
Now you’ll have to teach me how that’s relevant. Not that it surprises me, considering you never respond to the substance of my posts and instead respond with personal stuff.
Chip, chip, chip, chip.
Sox Machine
by Sox Machine on
Aug 26, 2008 12:53 AM CDT
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I thought your were the guy on the left.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 12:54 AM CDT
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Now I'm just a handsome Red X.
Chip, chip, chip, chip.
Sox Machine
by Sox Machine on
Aug 26, 2008 12:56 AM CDT
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Or not...

Caching is a wonderful thing.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH2005 on
Aug 26, 2008 9:57 AM CDT
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i never pegged him as a black man.
"Suck it up Bunky, we gotta go.'" - ron gardenhire
by larry on
Aug 26, 2008 9:58 AM CDT
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why are the two pictures different?
nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team
by colintj on
Aug 26, 2008 10:00 AM CDT
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Sox Machine tried to pull a fast one on me...
but I’m too quick for him
That is a cool picture though. The statue looks cool with the ice on it.
"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry
by SSH




