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Floyd Wins a Snoozer

The Sox had as many hits against Brian Burres before he recorded an out Wednesday as they did in 8 innings of effort in April. The recap of that game describes a fait accompli, all but over when John Danks lost his perfect game and shutout in the 6th inning. This game had pretty much the same feel, though thankfully with the teams reversed.

Orlando Cabrera led off the game with a bloop double, and Nick Swisher, batting in the #2 hole with AJ Pierzynski getting the night off, hit a HR in the game's second at-bat, to set the tempo for the night. All told, the Sox pounded out 9 extra-base hits on the evening, including 3 by Cabrera, to give themselves a 6-0 lead by the middle of the 4th inning and send the gamethreads into a blissfully sweet slumber.

Looking back at that April recap, the Sox have come a long way from the team "weighed down by three automatic outs at the bottom of the lineup." They've been downright dangerous from 1 through 9 since the addition of their new hitting coach at the deadline. Dare I say, they're even beating up the teams and pitchers you're supposed to bash into last week, the RA Dickeys of the baseball world. They almost look like a playoff team. Almost.

The last 30 games will tell the story.

* * * * *

Swisher left the game after fouling a ball of his leg. The leg was last seen in the mouth a wolf roaming Baltimore's inner harbor on a skateboard*, which is a dangerous place for a skateboarding wolf, dude. It's not known if Swisher's prosthetic leg, fashioned out of a discarded baseball bat (ash, not maple), will be ready in time for tomorrow's game.

* Everyone knows wolves can't ride skateboards. Stupid.

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furst

yaeeeaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!

"term: pussy, user: larry, count: 11

term: pussy, user: all, count: 83" - wiz

by Where Triples Go to Die on Aug 26, 2008 10:13 PM CDT   0 recs

awesome

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 10:20 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

lol, just read this:

“they accepted it (the resignation), it was my call entirely”

no shit? Like a movie star walks into a studio and goes, “I’m not making this film. Films about extra-terrestial dolphins having sex with the Olsen twins are a dying breed, fuck you”

And the guy is like “OK, cya”.

And then the actor reports it was all his decision — uh, thanks.

by madvillian on Aug 26, 2008 10:24 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Jay is that 1% of journalists that is well known enough (and not by any sort of merit)

that can make that decision and not give a fuck about where the next meal will come from. I’m sure with his other deals in TV he has plenty of disposable income.

That said, he’s probably pissed he hasn’t’ gotten the ESPN.com invite yet.

by madvillian on Aug 26, 2008 10:20 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I'd like to know what website would be dumb enough to hire him

He’s obviously looking to get out of the newspaper business. I’m sure he’s livid ESPN.com hasn’t come knocking yet. With all the crap he’s said in the past about blogs, it’s going to be hilarious to see him trying to become part of one now.

by El Duque's Raft on Aug 26, 2008 10:26 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

When has hypocrisy stopped him before?

I’m sure plenty of websites would like to hire him, just because he generates controversy, which generates traffic.

Coffee is for closers.

by vince_ on Aug 26, 2008 10:26 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I haven't read anything he's written in 3+ years

One of the greatest decisions I’ve ever made. I would enjoy nothing more than seeing some website hire him and for him to fail miserably.

by El Duque's Raft on Aug 26, 2008 10:31 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

He doesn't generate controversy

as much as he just spews whatever comes to his mind. He’s not clever nor funny. I just can’t believe that people actually go out of their way to see what his wretched opinion is on topics.

by El Duque's Raft on Aug 26, 2008 10:33 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I don't read him

But I don’t think the Sun-Times gave him a 3 year extension because he doesn’t get readers!

Coffee is for closers.

by vince_ on Aug 26, 2008 10:38 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

The issue isn't whether he's a giant bag of dicks. He is.

But he does generate intense reaction and therefore interest, like it or not. Much like car crashes, bear attacks and SSH.

I have always thought he was actually a good writer too.

by The Actual El Guapo on Aug 26, 2008 10:39 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

great. thanks for that comparison

now I’m gonna have to see SSH sporting a new sig “SSH = ratings”

AIM: SouthSideCheat

by The Cheat on Aug 26, 2008 10:41 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

ironically, it appears that kenwo did not, in fact, = ratings.

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

by MarketMaker on Aug 27, 2008 12:12 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

MM=ratings=beautiful

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Aug 27, 2008 12:14 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

ah yes

The transitive property of Market Maker.

"would've been a sweep if pablo was here" -Kenwo-

by Hazymania on Aug 27, 2008 2:57 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

And I will disagree

Don’t know if this was discussed on another thread but I think Jack Woltz from your Godfather analogy should be Billy Beane, with the horse’s head actually being Faustino DLS’s right arm. Payback for the Billy Koch trade. Andy Gonzalez would be Mary Corleone, worst character in the trilogy = worst player in sox history.

by El Duque's Raft on Aug 26, 2008 10:44 PM CDT to parent up   1 recs

He is good at crafting sentences and putting them together in a compelling fashion

But he never invested real thought into his stuff, so I didn’t see a reason, either.

Chip, chip, chip, chip.
Sox Machine

by Sox Machine on Aug 26, 2008 10:45 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I tried your replacement suggestion.

And the resulting sentence made my head hurt.

“I’m sure virtually all of which are run for profit websites would like to hire him…”

Now I’m at work, it’s 9am, and I have a headache. I hate you.

by ReservoirDog on Aug 27, 2008 9:02 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Ironically

His reasoning for leaving newspapers is probably the most reasonable/rational thing I’ve ever seen him say/write.

Coffee is for closers.

by vince_ on Aug 26, 2008 10:26 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

the grammar police are hot on the trail of this article.

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

by MarketMaker on Aug 27, 2008 12:10 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

AMERICA CAN LAUGH AGAIN

Uribe whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you, never, ever, during your trials and testings. When you saw only one set of footprints, It was then that I carried you."

by thecip on Aug 27, 2008 8:36 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

Uh, yea.

Great win that further emphasizes the division is the Sox’ to lose.

On a side note, I think the zeitgeist here has fallen too far into the silly category at the expense of adding new visitors, and it starts from the top down. Groupthink will probably disagree with me by posting pictures of dead animals and spelling fail fial and things.

All that stuff is great for those in the know, not so much for someone googling Sox blogs.

Oh well, SSS is still my home, can’t complain too much.

by madvillian on Aug 26, 2008 10:18 PM CDT   0 recs

This is a blog about millionaires who play a kid's game

Silliness is built in to the process, I’m afraid.

Coffee is for closers.

by vince_ on Aug 26, 2008 10:22 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

It starts from the top, is right

but I’m at my best—my best being adequate—when there’s something actually going on. A trade, groupthink from media in opposition to SSS groupthink.

I don’t really know what to do with boring ass victories.

AIM: SouthSideCheat

by The Cheat on Aug 26, 2008 10:24 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

it's a long season, man. i really don't think there are that many subjects that should/need to be addressed on a day-to-day basis.

i don’t think there’s ever been a lack of poignant discussion on any actual news that’s relating to the sox, but i can’t imagine anyone would want this site to pour over the trivial minutiae of every moment of every game. sanity forces us to get a little macro in our approach to a 162 game season. otherwise, we’d all come off like SSH.

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

by MarketMaker on Aug 27, 2008 12:19 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

obsessive, masturbatory number crunching ftw!

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Aug 27, 2008 12:22 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

cuz numburs r dumb and i hate em.

i dont need numburs to tell me crede hit some moar popups.

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

by MarketMaker on Aug 27, 2008 12:22 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

yeah.

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

by MarketMaker on Aug 27, 2008 12:23 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

touche.

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Aug 27, 2008 12:26 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

huh?

You're on thin fucking ice my pedigree chums, and I shall be under it when it breaks. Now, fuck off.

by MarketMaker on Aug 27, 2008 12:27 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

?huh

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Aug 27, 2008 10:46 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I disagree

I’m just a lurker here, but I’ll throw my opinion in as a reader. I love you guys in the comments, but I’ve got two complaints…
1) There’s a lot of self-referential stuff that makes it difficult for somebody new to come in. I read the site daily and sometimes I get lost. *
2) The front page is neglected. It’s been a lot better lately, as most games have a recap (which is awesome!), but when there is breaking news it’s often not posted on the front in a timely manner if at all. You’ve got to go into the last active FP post and scroll half-way down to find out that OMGWTF GRIFFEY?! **

( * ) It amazes me that there are hundreds of comments on each gamethread but there seems to only be a fraction of that in active posters.
( ** ) There are sometimes fanshots, but those rarely have comments and most of the discussion goes on in some random gamethread or thread from another topic.

Just my two-cents, I’ll go back to lurking :)

by azzy on Aug 27, 2008 2:04 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

one of us

one of us

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 27, 2008 8:30 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

"Suck it up Bunky, we gotta go.'" - ron gardenhire

by larry on Aug 27, 2008 10:44 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I got a text at 4 AM when I woke up today.

Saying the same thing. A nice wake-up surprise.
:)

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Aug 27, 2008 8:54 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

R. Rowland Smith is an asshole

learn how to throw

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 10:34 PM CDT   0 recs

Punto popped out to third.

I could gaze longingly at these words for all eternity and never tire of their beauty.

by The Actual El Guapo on Aug 26, 2008 10:54 PM CDT   0 recs

The difference is that all of Punto's pop-outs are productive outs.

Actually, all of the Twins’ outs are productive outs … and all of their losses are productive losses.

by The Actual El Guapo on Aug 26, 2008 11:09 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

they just lose the game the right way

I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.

by thatshortkid on Aug 26, 2008 11:10 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

The American way

Coffee is for closers.

by vince_ on Aug 26, 2008 11:11 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

*toilet flush*

flush begins, motor starts, water reverses course

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 11:12 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

"sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing"

Sniff

"would've been a sweep if pablo was here" -Kenwo-

by Hazymania on Aug 27, 2008 3:09 AM CDT to parent up   0 recs

you win some

you learn something critical from losing some

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 11:11 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

i was gonna say that

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 11:09 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

i think he worked on the bomb

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 11:11 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

breslow? i hardly knew her!

I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.

by thatshortkid on Aug 26, 2008 11:12 PM CDT to parent up   0 recs

I would like to thank the sox for winning in such a fashion that I didn't even need to pay attention to know it.

had the radio on very low 2 rooms away while preparing/having people over for dinner, barely heard 3 words in a row, and I still think I have a very good idea how the game went.

I would also like to thank the academy, and the cow that gave up its life for my enjoyment.

by Trooper on Aug 26, 2008 10:59 PM CDT   0 recs

Ibanez is showing reverse splits this year

despite a history of total suck against lefties.

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 11:10 PM CDT   0 recs

missed it by that much

and apparently the m’s have left the bases juiced twice now?

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Aug 26, 2008 11:15 PM CDT   0 recs