ESPN: McAdam: Sizing up the division races

by larry on Aug 4, 2008 3:12 PM CDT 0 recs

pray tell

what is the exact amount of times something can be discussed before the “dead horse” pictures come out to play?

on a related subject, is it possible to quantify exactly when it’s ok to scoreboard watch or get pissed about the team’s play without eliciting responses that generally are all caps and 18K letters per word?

we really ought to write this shit down…

I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.

by thatshortkid on Aug 4, 2008 3:39 PM CDT up 0 recs

i don't see anyone beating it.

that’s a donkey, by the way. it represents the white sox. at least it died with a smile on its face…

by larry on Aug 4, 2008 3:41 PM CDT up 0 recs

ah so.... so more of a "dead ass" than "beating a dead horse" comment

eh, it’s all equus.

I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.

by thatshortkid on Aug 4, 2008 3:46 PM CDT up 0 recs

i'll stay away from the equus in the future for the avoidance of doubt.

by larry on Aug 4, 2008 3:50 PM CDT up 0 recs

oh no, venturing in cetaceans.

I wish to God that someone would be able to block out the voices in my head for five minutes, the voices that scream, over and over again: "Why do they come to me to die? Why do they come to me to die?"

by omnipotent grab on Aug 4, 2008 3:52 PM CDT up 0 recs

Nice

One of your clients?

shaftr, the ghost author. cheat, the never-present manager. colin, the obfuscating author. wiz…well. who the fuck knows. at least he shows up to work.

by winningugly on Aug 4, 2008 6:02 PM CDT up 0 recs

don't you mean one of his "former" clients?

"fortunately, i'm adhering to a pretty strict, uh, drug, uh, regimen to keep my mind, you know, uh, limber."

by Toonderstrook on Aug 4, 2008 6:04 PM CDT up 0 recs

Still flapping his gums

Must be an attorney or investment professional.

shaftr, the ghost author. cheat, the never-present manager. colin, the obfuscating author. wiz…well. who the fuck knows. at least he shows up to work.

by winningugly on Aug 4, 2008 6:07 PM CDT up 0 recs

at what point does the horse meme in and of itself become ironically, beating a dead horse?

by madvillian on Aug 4, 2008 4:20 PM CDT up 0 recs

i'm not sure that's really an issue since no one has been posting horses for awhile.

by larry on Aug 4, 2008 4:24 PM CDT up 0 recs

I still find these fucking hilarious

but that’s me. Mr. Vegas.

shaftr, the ghost author. cheat, the never-present manager. colin, the obfuscating author. wiz…well. who the fuck knows. at least he shows up to work.

by winningugly on Aug 4, 2008 6:08 PM CDT up 0 recs

mr. vegas? what are we just assigning ourselves nicknames at this point?

and that’s what you come up with? mr. vegas?

fuck you, that's my name!! you know why, mister? 'cause you drove a hyundai to get here tonight, I drove a eighty thousand dollar bmw. that's my name!!

by MarketMaker on Aug 5, 2008 8:17 AM CDT up 0 recs

I thought that's the name that had to follow "but that's me".

Like peas and carrots.

shaftr, the ghost author. cheat, the never-present manager. colin, the obfuscating author. wiz…well. who the fuck knows. at least he shows up to work.

by winningugly on Aug 5, 2008 8:45 AM CDT up 0 recs

Effing Seattle.

Where teams come to win divisions….

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 4, 2008 3:20 PM CDT 0 recs

and fuck the port sluts.

by larry on Aug 4, 2008 3:21 PM CDT up 0 recs

yes seaman will do that.

I wish to God that someone would be able to block out the voices in my head for five minutes, the voices that scream, over and over again: "Why do they come to me to die? Why do they come to me to die?"

by omnipotent grab on Aug 4, 2008 3:30 PM CDT up 0 recs

and get some delicious clam chowder.

Perfect for post-division-winning games and pre-port-slut-effing.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 4, 2008 3:51 PM CDT up 0 recs

chowder is what they're going to be feeding you, ho.

by larry on Aug 4, 2008 3:53 PM CDT up 0 recs

I almost thought the set-up was too obvious...

too obvious for the likes of you, Lar-Bear.

Clam chowder makes the chowder taste better. I’m really just looking out for my own best interest here.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 4, 2008 3:56 PM CDT up 0 recs

i would've had you pegged as more of a pineapple juice girl.

by larry on Aug 4, 2008 3:56 PM CDT up 0 recs

ba-zing!

fuck you, that's my name!! you know why, mister? 'cause you drove a hyundai to get here tonight, I drove a eighty thousand dollar bmw. that's my name!!

by MarketMaker on Aug 4, 2008 4:52 PM CDT up 0 recs

a little late, but I couldn't resist...

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 5, 2008 10:24 AM CDT up 0 recs

Well the goods news (if any)

Seattle were knuckleheads and didnt trade players they should have.

The SSS motto should be the answer to "What is our deepest fear?". Or maybe just Prozac.

by Tdogg on Aug 4, 2008 3:37 PM CDT 0 recs

yes, we could always be seattle fans.

by madvillian on Aug 4, 2008 4:21 PM CDT up 0 recs

That is a shite state of affairs to be in...

and no amount of fresh air could change that.
Never has quoting “Trainspotting” been so applicable.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 4, 2008 4:24 PM CDT up 0 recs

nah they've become white sox fans...

It’s true, I read it on the internet

http://seattlest.com/2008/08/04/all_aboard_the_white_sox_griffey_ba.php

AIM: SouthSideCheat

by The Cheat on Aug 4, 2008 4:24 PM CDT up 0 recs

Any chance we can

take Nick Punto out…I mean put a hit on him. I know some guys, but I need to raise some cash…

"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."

by BobbySouthSide on Aug 4, 2008 4:26 PM CDT 0 recs

i think the Morneau hit would help a lot more

"as much as i hate dj i don't want him to get molested"- BuehrleMan

by U-God on Aug 4, 2008 5:24 PM CDT up 0 recs

He's too boring

Punto can die Italian-style, blaze of glory. Morneau would be mute, arms folded.

shaftr, the ghost author. cheat, the never-present manager. colin, the obfuscating author. wiz…well. who the fuck knows. at least he shows up to work.

by winningugly on Aug 4, 2008 6:06 PM CDT up 0 recs

I'll be in closest proximity to him for the next couple days...

and I hear WA is a great state to stash a body.

Let me know.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 4, 2008 5:27 PM CDT up 0 recs

Oh hells no.

You already epically fialed on the first mission to monitor the clubhouse during Cooper’s pulled fat episode, what the hell makes you think we can trust you this time?

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 4, 2008 7:14 PM CDT up 0 recs

Good point.

I was on vacation at the time, however, and I try to make it a point to not reconnaissance whilst on holiday.

You never know M-F, though. I get awfully heated during my work days and then drive down Edgar Martinez every day right after work.

(Today, for example, at 2:45 PM PST, I could be found with my head out of my car window, yelling “Fuck the Twins!” as I drove alongside Safeco).

If I see Poontang crossing the road, I might be so inclined to accelerate. We’re talking about the division here, people.

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 4, 2008 8:06 PM CDT up 0 recs

fun with scheduling

white sox, returning from kansas city (~ 80 minute flight) get this monday off.

on august 14th, they fly from chicago to oakland on a thursday, then back to chicago on sunday (~250 minute flight) after playing 13 days in a row (as opposed to 10 before today’s day off) and three more to go before an off thursday. day off monday? no way.

thanks, bud.

"fortunately, i'm adhering to a pretty strict, uh, drug, uh, regimen to keep my mind, you know, uh, limber."

by Toonderstrook on Aug 4, 2008 5:28 PM CDT 0 recs

Ah, the Twinks have Seattle

twice in 22 days out West.

How turgid are you reading “out West”?

Your Chicago genes have been bathed in too much Chardonnay, you POS. Grab an Old Style and get thee next to me, Toonder. Remember your roots.

shaftr, the ghost author. cheat, the never-present manager. colin, the obfuscating author. wiz…well. who the fuck knows. at least he shows up to work.

by winningugly on Aug 4, 2008 6:05 PM CDT up 0 recs

did i mention the twins? did i? did i?

you’re the wine swiller, not me. i never gave up on the beer, especially because it’s better out here. i will refrain from making elaborate comment on your shakespearean pick up line.

"fortunately, i'm adhering to a pretty strict, uh, drug, uh, regimen to keep my mind, you know, uh, limber."

by Toonderstrook on Aug 4, 2008 6:10 PM CDT up 0 recs

I'm just saying the schedule ain't kind to many, not just us.

And I would NEVER tell you to get behind me. Unless we were driving in separate cars.

You POS.

shaftr, the ghost author. cheat, the never-present manager. colin, the obfuscating author. wiz…well. who the fuck knows. at least he shows up to work.

by winningugly on Aug 4, 2008 6:14 PM CDT up 0 recs

A Toonder by any other name.....

"just realized the superman uni is barely visible but slightly protruding out of his jersey. and i began to slightly protrude out of my pants." - MM

by homesickalien on Aug 4, 2008 6:16 PM CDT up 0 recs

You might not TELL him to get behind you, because you're a gentleman and would ASK him to do so

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 4, 2008 7:16 PM CDT up 0 recs

and then call him a bitch

brndnprkns: I'm pretty sure the "badass" value of your life is closer to Gigli than The Dark Knight

by whitesoxmatt on Aug 4, 2008 8:20 PM CDT up 0 recs

will someone start a thread for the minnesota game later tonight?

because this sox fan cares about the twins. clearly.

He was a catcher with the Orioles back in the day. Sorry looking (expletive). My brother had his card. He looked like this little kid who got left at a bus station by his parents. You know why? Because he had to catch Hoyt Wilhelms knuckle ball five (expletive) years.

by onlysoxfaninboston on Aug 4, 2008 7:43 PM CDT 0 recs

I'm sure larry would be happy to oblige

/runs away quickly while covering his ears, waiting for the bomb to explode

this isn't hard. you live in a port city. and you're a slut. do the math. -larry

by rhythm on Aug 4, 2008 8:03 PM CDT up 0 recs

he would probably take the game thread

and wrap it around my throat and strangle me with it, if I was serious of course, clearly

He was a catcher with the Orioles back in the day. Sorry looking (expletive). My brother had his card. He looked like this little kid who got left at a bus station by his parents. You know why? Because he had to catch Hoyt Wilhelms knuckle ball five (expletive) years.

by onlysoxfaninboston on Aug 4, 2008 8:14 PM CDT up 0 recs

I tried to get Yankees/Sox tickets for their Sep. Series today

Wow. Cheap seats, talking upper deck back along the shitty left field overhang, row “N” and up, are going for no less than $60/seat. Bleacher seats are going for $50 on stubhub. Best tickets I found at a reasonable price were behind him plate, first row uppper deck: $190 for the pair.

I should have gotten my tickets a long time ago, I was planning on going to this series since the schedules came out, now I”m prolly priced out.

by madvillian on Aug 4, 2008 9:31 PM CDT 0 recs

Why don't you just get tickets for free?

That’s what I did.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

I CAN'T STAND IT.
Sox Machine

by Sox Machine on Aug 4, 2008 11:45 PM CDT up 0 recs

I hate having to pay for it.

by madvillian on Aug 4, 2008 11:55 PM CDT up 0 recs

how did you get tix for free?

He was a catcher with the Orioles back in the day. Sorry looking (expletive). My brother had his card. He looked like this little kid who got left at a bus station by his parents. You know why? Because he had to catch Hoyt Wilhelms knuckle ball five (expletive) years.

by onlysoxfaninboston on Aug 5, 2008 9:02 AM CDT up 0 recs

But seriously, I wouldn’t be going if my connection didn’t work. Everybody’s doing their “it’s my last chance EVAR to go to Yankee Stadium!” thing.

I CAN'T STAND IT.
Sox Machine

by Sox Machine on Aug 5, 2008 9:24 AM CDT up 0 recs

Yo brother

I’ve got tickets to all 4 (bleachers M,T,W and upper deck thurs).

On thurs, I have friends coming from Chicago, but I may be able to help you out (at face) for one of the other nights.
I’ll let you know when it gets closer.

by Crede's Crew on Aug 5, 2008 12:40 AM CDT up 0 recs

Excellent, let me know!

by madvillian on Aug 5, 2008 8:19 AM CDT up 0 recs

i'd be interested (too)

give me a heads up down the road. priority to madvillian of course.

He was a catcher with the Orioles back in the day. Sorry looking (expletive). My brother had his card. He looked like this little kid who got left at a bus station by his parents. You know why? Because he had to catch Hoyt Wilhelms knuckle ball five (expletive) years.

by onlysoxfaninboston on Aug 5, 2008 9:03 AM CDT up 0 recs