Chicago White Sox @ Minnesota Twins GameThread, Sep 25, 2008 7:10 PM CDT

Division Denouement: White Sox (86-71) @ Twins (86-72)

by The Cheat on Sep 25, 2008 6:00 PM CDT in Game Threads

Chicago White Sox @ Minnesota Twins

Next Game

Chicago White Sox
@ Minnesota Twins

Thursday, Sep 25, 2008, 7:10 PM CDT
Metrodome

Gavin Floyd vs Kevin Slowey

Clear. Game time temp of 72 degrees with a 90% chance of Big Hairy Balls.

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And so the season comes down to this. Sure, there remains 4 games left on the Sox' schedule after tonight's contest, but the division champion will be determined tonight. A Sox win puts them 1.5 games, needing only to match Twins victories over the final weekend to avoid playing an extra game against "Big Game" Freddy and the Tigers on Monday.

The Sox send out Gavin Floyd, who has gained a reputation as the White Sox' stopper this season thanks to 9-2 following a Sox loss and stopping a losing streak of 3 or more games 5 times this season including twice against the Twins. Floyd has been a revelation this season, and tonight is his opportunity to go from discarded, failed prospect to modern-day White Sox legend. He struggled in his last outing against Royals on short rest, but turned in his most impressive outing since his improbable start in Yankee Stadium last week.

Sitting here at home, I've changed things up. I've personally vanquished gay porn actor Christopher Michaels. I contributed exactly zero to the flagging American economy today, calling in sick (I really am, though feeling better now) and sleeping most of the day away. I've busted out the nameless authentic home pinstripes jersey I wore during every game of the 2005 playoff run and will be searching for that perfect posture of nervous optimism. America and the White Sox, fuck yeah!

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Comments

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:03 PM CDT 1 recs

90% chance of Big Hairy Balls? I wonder what that looks like on the doppler...

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:06 PM CDT 0 recs

liar.

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:12 PM CDT up 0 recs

Ceterum censeo Minneainem esse delendam.

by thecip on Sep 25, 2008 6:12 PM CDT 4 recs

was gonna draw big hairy balls but i didnt want to get fired

Ceterum censeo Minneainem esse delendam.

by thecip on Sep 25, 2008 6:15 PM CDT up 0 recs

hahaha. Most of us can use our imaginations.

Although it would help me personally if the oranges were hairy.

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:18 PM CDT up 0 recs

and flesh-colored.

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:18 PM CDT up 0 recs

those aren't flesh colored? excuse me...i think i need to make a phone call.

"you threw it like a fucking hydrogen bomb."

by Toonderstrook on Sep 25, 2008 6:19 PM CDT up 0 recs

hehehehehe

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:31 PM CDT up 0 recs

They should be wearing a wig

A Floyd pre-12th win wig.

White Sox, that’s baseball.

by vince_ on Sep 25, 2008 7:00 PM CDT up 0 recs

2 large acorns would have done better than 2 oranges or pumpkins

by JoeCoolMan24 on Sep 25, 2008 6:19 PM CDT up 0 recs

Or coconuts

They have hair

White Sox, that’s baseball.

by vince_ on Sep 25, 2008 6:59 PM CDT up 0 recs

awwwww shit! cip, you may have to take this suggestion!

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 7:00 PM CDT up 0 recs

yes.

Ceterum censeo Minneainem esse delendam.

by thecip on Sep 25, 2008 7:03 PM CDT up 0 recs

Well, boys, I reckon this is it

Nuclear combat toe-to-toe with the Twinkies – GO SOX!

"The little things are always in my mind," he said. "I always like to move the guy over, I like to bunt."

by ChicagoPete on Sep 25, 2008 6:18 PM CDT 0 recs

here we go tonight......furbs is sitting locked in his dorm room...chicks in line at the door waiting might i add

wearing his sox jersey and hat….huddled over his laptop waiting in anticipation for the game

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Sep 25, 2008 6:21 PM CDT 0 recs

and talking (typing rather) in 3rd person.

by JoeCoolMan24 on Sep 25, 2008 6:22 PM CDT up 0 recs

no i talk too...furbs recites what's typed to the world for all to hear

be hit screaming fuck as gomez grabbed aj’s shot last night….or yelling boom bitch when general soreness hits a homerun

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Sep 25, 2008 6:23 PM CDT up 0 recs

Tell them ladies to wait! You've got a date with big hairy balls tonight!

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:32 PM CDT up 0 recs

they are waiting...my secretary is having them take numbers...

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Sep 25, 2008 6:33 PM CDT up 0 recs

I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.

by thatshortkid on Sep 25, 2008 6:58 PM CDT up 0 recs

The Sox are warming up on the field right now. They look like they lack the discipline to want it more than the Twins. Guess I'm getting October off. - 12 minutes ago

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:23 PM CDT 0 recs

Wow

This game must really be big

by Option27 on Sep 25, 2008 6:29 PM CDT 0 recs

Men nothing is as good as it seems and nothing is as bad as it seems, but somewhere in between there reality falls. We are not as bad as SSH2005 would lead you to believe. We can’t change the past but we can change the future. We cannot allow the Twins to beat us three games in a row. They beat us yesterday, and we cannot lose tonight because we are wallowing in self-pity thinking about what we should have done Tuesday. Remember the good Lord put eyes in the front of your head rather than in back so you can see where you are going – rather than where you’ve been. What we found out this week when things go wrong the only friends you have in this world are those that you eat with, sleep with, believe with, pray with, and cry with. That is your family and your teammates. Sure as shit isn’t that slanty-eyed fuck SSH2005 or that douchebag crackerjack box shrink dantesox. We have to be a family – doesn’t mean you have the same last name or the same address – what it does mean is that you don’t let one another down. We let one another down yesterday and we aren’t going to do it tonight. How well we play today is critical to your future! I’m not talking about baseball – I’m talking about life. Twenty years from now – you’re going to get laid off your job, the bank is going to refuse to extend the mortgage on your home, your car breaks down on your way home, and when you finally get home your four children tell you that your wife ran off with MarketMaker. You aren’t even going to flinch, you are going to say ‘I met the challenge at the Metrodome and I’ll meet the challenge here.’ It’s all about believing, someone has to pay for what happened yesterday, and its going to be Kevin Slowey and that asshole Nick Punto and the rest of those goddamn Twins today. Let’s go.

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:35 PM CDT 5 recs

line breaks, please.

by JoeCoolMan24 on Sep 25, 2008 6:35 PM CDT up 0 recs

it's a locker room speech not your high school english paper, faggot.

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:37 PM CDT up 0 recs

who's speech was that?

by The Scoper on Sep 25, 2008 7:54 PM CDT up 0 recs

everyone - hands in!

GOOOOOO SOOOOOXXXXXXXXXX

LET’S DO IT! I’M READY TO SEE PUNTO CHOPPED INTO PIECES AND SCATTERED ACROSS THE FAKE GRASS. I’M READY TO SEE URIBE AND THOME EACH WORKING ON A LEG BY THE 7TH INNING.

NOW OR NEVER, SOX! WAKE THE FUCK UP AND PLAY SOME BASEBALLZ!

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:39 PM CDT up 0 recs

also.....I laughed out loud at "slanty-eyed fuck."

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:41 PM CDT up 0 recs

that was fucking amazing lare...

LET’S FUCKING GO

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Sep 25, 2008 6:46 PM CDT up 0 recs

What? No Magic trick?

Seriously though, Lou’s pep talks never seemed to work.

AIM: SouthSideCheat

by The Cheat on Sep 25, 2008 6:46 PM CDT up 0 recs

that's because they weren't delivered by me.

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:50 PM CDT up 0 recs

Perfect. It's. On.

by The Actual El Guapo on Sep 25, 2008 6:46 PM CDT up 0 recs

by southsideirish on Sep 25, 2008 6:49 PM CDT up 0 recs

don't talk to us like we're adopted, bro.

"you threw it like a fucking hydrogen bomb."

by Toonderstrook on Sep 25, 2008 6:51 PM CDT up 0 recs

i now know at least four faggots with who i would not want to be in a foxhole.

you’re soft, susie.

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:52 PM CDT up 0 recs

it's turtle, not susie.

"you threw it like a fucking hydrogen bomb."

by Toonderstrook on Sep 25, 2008 6:53 PM CDT up 0 recs

how about we just stick with faggot?

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:54 PM CDT up 0 recs

sir, yes, sir, sgt. faggot, sir.

"you threw it like a fucking hydrogen bomb."

by Toonderstrook on Sep 25, 2008 6:55 PM CDT up 0 recs

only steers and queers live in northern california!

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:56 PM CDT up 0 recs

'splains the horns.

"you threw it like a fucking hydrogen bomb."

by Toonderstrook on Sep 25, 2008 6:57 PM CDT up 0 recs

Heading out to watch the game since I don't get CSN

may Q! be with you all

World, meet the Southside White Sox.

by Illini0509 on Sep 25, 2008 6:37 PM CDT 0 recs

what bars down here show the game?

"Deserve's got nothin to do with it."

by U-God on Sep 25, 2008 6:37 PM CDT up 0 recs

I'm assuming firehaus won't be a problem

I know a few people there and the Cubs have already clinched, so I bet we can get one tv

World, meet the Southside White Sox.

by Illini0509 on Sep 25, 2008 6:39 PM CDT up 0 recs

also

BW3 always puts them on if you ask

World, meet the Southside White Sox.

by Illini0509 on Sep 25, 2008 6:40 PM CDT up 0 recs

too far

do like the haus though

2 of my old bosses work there now

"Deserve's got nothin to do with it."

by U-God on Sep 25, 2008 6:45 PM CDT up 0 recs

BUO de Rapido

Or something.

I haven’t published the stats yet, but they’ll be up pretty shortly. Slowey is a unique pitcher in the way that most Twins pitchers are: they throw a ton of strikes. The fastball to either RHB or LHB is prone to being hit with power (nothing off the charts, but it’s above .300 ISO, which is more or less my point of reference for good/bad), more so by LHB.

He features a cutter (marked as a splitter for no good reason in Kalk’s database…I’ve harangued him about the fact that no one throws a splitter anymore, but to my knowledge he hasn’t done any updates to the database in a while now…he’s probably sick of hearing my “ideas” anyway) that so far has been very successful against RHB. He can throw it for strikes and minimize damage (sinker esque ISO, but nothing outrageous). His slider is a strange pitch that gets a lot of whiffs, but it’s largely because he doesn’t like to put it in the zone. Moreover, it looks like he prefers to throw it inside to RHB. If you can recognize the slider, just lay off. Slowey should be the kind of pitcher RHB can work with because you can look fastball and lay off the location he sticks to with the slider.

Against lefties, the cutter is pretty dangerous. The power numbers against the fastball go up, but against the cutter, LHB haven’t managed even a .100 ISO. I tentatively suggest that it might be a good idea to get more RHB in the lineup, particularly with the bad case of slow we’ve got in our lefties. It also gets a very solid, particularly for a cutter, a 12+% whiff rate. As long as he gets ahead with his fastball, he’s got a number of options against lefties. And thus far, he’s been able to get ahead. He posts a very minimal split in his ball% when examining LHB vs. RHB, which isn’t true of most pitchers.

All in all, we’ve got a guy who’s stuff is playing way up because of his command. When he can’t throw good strikes with the fastball, he can get into Blackburn-of-late kind of trouble. Not that that necessarily translates to runs when your luck is like the Sox, but cackle with knowing glee if we start hitting his fastball hard consistently. Eventually, they will drop in for base hits, I promise. It just might be next season when it happens.

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Sep 25, 2008 6:42 PM CDT 0 recs

nice job, especially with you being back at school and working and all.

"you threw it like a fucking hydrogen bomb."

by Toonderstrook on Sep 25, 2008 6:45 PM CDT up 0 recs

go you colin

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Sep 25, 2008 6:49 PM CDT up 0 recs

Kalk opens email and thinks

not this Colin asshole again.

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:51 PM CDT up 0 recs

Seriously, though, I was just wondering what happened to you and your BUOs.

Thanks for makin’ one for the big game!!
Very good.

And I hope we are cackling soooon..

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:51 PM CDT up 0 recs

you kids

takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm

by furby2056 on Sep 25, 2008 6:53 PM CDT up 0 recs

translation

seriously, colin, why haven’t you called? it sure the fuck isn’t because you’ve been busy with these stupid BUOs. this one was especially lame since you did it on the fly.

"you threw it like a fucking hydrogen bomb."

by Toonderstrook on Sep 25, 2008 6:54 PM CDT up 0 recs

seriously, colin, why haven’t you called? it sure the fuck isn’t because you’ve been busy with these stupid BUOs. this one was especially lame since you did it on the fly. i need your cock in my ass.

fixed.

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:55 PM CDT up 0 recs

seriously, colin, why haven’t you called? it sure the fuck isn’t because you’ve been busy with these stupid BUOs. this one was especially lame since you did it on the fly. i need your fist in my ass.

fixed.

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 6:57 PM CDT up 0 recs

good port slut.

i lack the discipline to want it more.

by larry on Sep 25, 2008 6:59 PM CDT up 0 recs

(puurrrrrrrrr)

(wait, I am getting a head scratch, right? cuz if so, I’m purring).

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Sep 25, 2008 7:01 PM CDT up 0 recs

FURRY!

run away!

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Sep 25, 2008 9:28 PM CDT up 0 recs

BUO stat page to follow:

Damn ass Piranhas.

nothing gets ‘em wetter than infrequent postings on the city’s second favorite team

by colintj on Sep 25, 2008 6:44 PM CDT 0 recs

This was expected...

Cliff Lee probably won’t pitch Sunday unless the White Sox’s status for the postseason remains in doubt.
Lee is bothered by a stiff neck, but he is hoping to pitch. “It’s not my decision,” Lee said. “My job is to pitch when they want me to pitch, and that’s what I’ll do. I definitely want to pitch every chance I get.”

Source: Indians.mlb.com

"god, you’re fucking stupid."
-- Larry

by SSH2005 on Sep 25, 2008 6:51 PM CDT 0 recs