But Who Will Sign the Parker Bros.?
by The Cheat on Jan 6, 2009 12:05 AM CST
in Rumors
177 comments
After a sleepy two weeks over the holidays, baseball kicked back into off-season action Monday.
-
Milton Bradley will reportedly sign with the Cubs despite the fact that they still reside in the National League.
I really wanted to include the Choi Hoon cartoon which featured Angry Milton waving the bucket of balls over his head in every cell, but I couldn't find it. A half-hour of internet searching yields results. Hoon's cartoons can be found here.
- Unlike the perpetually angry and injured Bradley, Pat Burrell will switch leagues to take on a DH role with the Rays. The two contracts combine for a total of 5/$46M (about $9M per annum), compared to the $11.5M Jermaine Dye is owed this season. Burrell and Bradley share a similar skill set with JD, the offensive minded (if a bit more OBP-driven) corner outfielder who would be better off at DH for one reason or another. It doesn't take much insight to figure out why the Sox were unable to unload Jermaine Dye for any value.
- Kenny Williams, "through a spokesman," officially shot down the seemingly ludicrous Floyd-for-Roberts rumor.
- Scott Gregor pisses on the Jon Garland To Return campfire.
But he does find time to bring up the names Freddy Garcia (maybe, because I think he'll be really cheap), Carl Pavano (No), and Paul Byrd (Yes, but that's only because [Starter Candidate 5] throws about as well as Terrelle Pryor) as possible bargain free agents for the not-quite-ready-for-prime-time Sox rotation.You can pretty much forget about another free agent, Jon Garland, as long as Ozzie’s in the dugout. They never got along before Garland was traded to the Angels last off-season, so that bridge has been torched.
- One name that I would rather bring in ahead of all of those options, Pedro Martinez, is the subject of some dubiously unsubstantiated rumors regarding the Sox, which I point to only because it's about time we had a rumor on the front page that I like. In reality, Pedro is contemplating offers from 4 teams, two in each league.
0 recs |
177 comments
|
Email
Print
Comments
another uninteded consequence of the Bradley signing
Lastings Milledge, who was thought to be available, will now be competing for the Nationals starting CF job since the Nats were unable to land Bradley.
AIM: SouthSideCheat
by The Cheat on Jan 6, 2009 12:34 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
I'm so glad somebody else knows the wonders of those Korean baseball cartoons
My favorite:
Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?
by UribeAuction on Jan 6, 2009 12:48 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
why does AJ have a cape?
Sober, I was appalled at the women. Drunk I was told I danced with them all.
by colintj on Jan 6, 2009 1:00 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
it's his gimmick in professional wrestling.
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Jan 6, 2009 1:05 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I don't know what's going on there...
but it looks HILARIOUS.
www.stallingtheman.blogspot.com
by Raf on Jan 6, 2009 1:20 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
i think it's a summary of his career
but in the style of a soap opera
Sober, I was appalled at the women. Drunk I was told I danced with them all.
by colintj on Jan 6, 2009 1:31 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I just love it for the one where he's holding up the picture of...
Brett Tomko and telling Joe Borchard to hit a home run off him.
And also, the three little kids who turn out to be Nathan, Liriano, and Bonser.
Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?
by UribeAuction on Jan 6, 2009 1:54 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
how the hell do you know that's joe borchard?
Sober, I was appalled at the women. Drunk I was told I danced with them all.
by colintj on Jan 6, 2009 11:12 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
hhhmmm....maybe it isn't Borchard
But it was Borchard who hit the HR off Tomko in spring training of ’05 and got $100 from Pierzynski.
Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?
by UribeAuction on Jan 6, 2009 11:17 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
never heard that story
Sober, I was appalled at the women. Drunk I was told I danced with them all.
by colintj on Jan 6, 2009 11:43 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
watch more games.
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Korean comedy parodies
It is not wrestling gimmick.
by siori81 on Jan 7, 2009 2:32 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
for one´s information.
Choi-Hoon is Minnesota Twins Fan.
by siori81 on Jan 7, 2009 2:42 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
can anyone translate this?
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:19 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Korean -> English
I’m Korean. and White sox Fan :)
I’m sorry I didn’t like my english conversation.
by siori81 on Jan 7, 2009 2:35 AM CST up reply actions 9 recs
Rec'd. Thanks. Wonderful stuff.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 7, 2009 6:37 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Great, great stuff.
Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?
by UribeAuction on Jan 7, 2009 11:58 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
dude you rock
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Jan 7, 2009 12:09 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
This is freaking funny
Does anyone know Korean? I really want to know whats going on as well
The picture of Barrett crying with AJ and the cape is gold!
"Chad Pennington should be MVP"-Woody Paige, Around the Horn 12-18-08
by rangerjae on Jan 6, 2009 5:36 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
I don't really undertand the Bradley trade
He’s is good but he gets hurt alot. Plus DeRosa was one of the few Cubs that I liked. Whatever though, not my team.
by 815Sox on Jan 6, 2009 8:46 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
My Cub Fan Uncle's facebook status
s Happy the CHICAGO CUBS picked up Milton Bradley today! Could he be the missing piece? LETS GO CUBS “09”
He also has a huge sign in his front yard that says “Its Gonna Happen!”
by 815Sox on Jan 6, 2009 9:13 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
kill him
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
A living death is far more satisfying.
I don't need to look at fancy stats
to see if a guy is good or not. You might have to.
by Where Triples Go to Die on Nov 30, 2008 4:16 PM CST
by omnipotent grab on Jan 6, 2009 10:02 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
It's about time...
“Bush Chooses Uribe For Medal Of Freedom”
—Huffington Post 1/6
by RoyEgan on Jan 6, 2009 9:28 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
Finally
That man will protect your farm from the evils of communism and terrorism – with shotgun in hand! Don’t let him get to close to the pigs or cows though and keep him well fed.
Just cleaned out an old closet and found my 2005 World Series Cap autographed by Damaso Marte and Juan Uribe. GOLD BABY! What do you think that would fetch on Ebay?
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:15 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'll give you $5, cash, right now
My Mom and Dad went to Oklahoma, and all they brought back for me was this signature.
by rhythm on Jan 6, 2009 10:23 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
You must be joking
the hat alone is worth over $10….I know it is devalued somewhat with the autographs, but I would think at least $7.50?
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:31 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'LL TRADE YOU A BALL SIGNED BY MAN SOO LEE FOR IT
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Jan 6, 2009 11:41 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
UR SUCH A LOSER FURBY OMG
Sober, I was appalled at the women. Drunk I was told I danced with them all.
by colintj on Jan 6, 2009 11:42 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I STOLE THE BALL OUT OF MY BROTHERS ROOM DUDEZ
AND I JUST REALIZED IT’S ALSO SIGNED BY BUD SELIG TOO LOLZ
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Jan 6, 2009 11:43 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
MORE LIKE COLIN THE DICK
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Jan 6, 2009 11:44 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?
by UribeAuction on Jan 6, 2009 11:46 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Did he sign it in Korean?
Otherwise no deal.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:44 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
NO, BUT HE PUT HIS NUMBER ON IT IN CASE YOU EVER NEED A CATCHER
takes some real stones for the one certifiable cocksucker on here to jump into this convo.-mm
by furby2056 on Jan 6, 2009 11:46 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Excellent
I am already hooked in as a VIP to his website…had to learn Korean to read it, but well worth it!
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:50 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
The video is hilarious!!!!!!
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:50 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
video is choppy, dammit...
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 1:31 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Those Koreans know how to party, though!
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 1:50 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
they sure do
I paused the video and left it for 5 minutes or so
afterwards it played fine…
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 2:06 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Love those Koreans! (I think this is Korean, anyway)
"There will be surgery. It will heal. It will heal fast."- Carlos Quentin on NBC 5 News Chicago (9/5/08)
by tailgater on Jan 6, 2009 3:41 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
That's Japanese
but thanks for playing.
kthnxbai
My Mom and Dad went to Oklahoma, and all they brought back for me was this signature.
by rhythm on Jan 6, 2009 5:34 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Eh, Korean, Japanese...whatever.
"There will be surgery. It will heal. It will heal fast."- Carlos Quentin on NBC 5 News Chicago (9/5/08)
by tailgater on Jan 6, 2009 11:07 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
look at these!
I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.
by thatshortkid on Jan 6, 2009 11:13 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I HOPE HE DOESN'T EAT IT!!!!
(sad trombone)
How much is that Uribe in the window?
by thecip on Jan 6, 2009 10:54 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
No way
I don’t see this happening.
Per Rosenthal:
Perhaps because of the cool market for his services, Orlando Cabrera is willing to play second base. The Yankees did not have interest.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:18 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
he is 34 next season.
any team that was considering signing him for more than one season would have to at least consider that he’s going to be a 2b at the end of the contract. an adjustment in expectations from cabrera could yield a longer, albeit less lucrative, contract based upon this.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:25 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I don't know - with his blood feud with Renteria
I bet he doesn’t go to 2B until Edgar does, or is gone. Pride. Matters.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 10:28 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I was thinking the same thing.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:32 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
He had good defensive stats last year
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:32 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
sure. how many years you want to bank on that continuing?
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:34 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
2 year deal
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:36 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
what do you think cabrera would be worth to a team with an incumbent SS who is as good or better than cabrera but a 2b who isn't and none in the pipeline?
at the very least, one would offer more years.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:39 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'd agree about the years
Not sure anyone would give that high of a monetary contract to cabrera to play 2B, plus give up a high draft pick.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:47 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
i might be willing to go four years.
assuming i’m not paying SS money. it’s the classic guaranteed cash dilemma. say, $22M for two or $35M for four? and if my first round pick is protected, i don’t really care about the pick.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:57 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Wow, that much?
I’m thinking he is going to get a one or two year deal from the Royals or Nats (both protected picks, I think)…for about $8 mil annually. I’d be surprised if he gets more $$ than that per year.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:02 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
it would certainly be highly amusing to see renteria get that much more than him.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 11:04 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I think it could happen!
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:16 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
sentence structure =
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:24 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
how much better would we be with orlando at 2b/ss?
i’m also pleased by the news from robothal that swisher (along with nady) is drawing a good bit of interest from other teams. it’d be fantastic if the yankees netted a good package while we sent him away (along with kanekoa) for very little.
by Craig Grebeck on Jan 6, 2009 10:30 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
one would have to guess at roster construction
but i’d use getz at 2b and move alexei to center. so basically whatever you think the difference is between owens et al and alexei in center. of course, it’s probably more likely that alexei stayed at 2b and owens was in center. in the latter case, the better wouldn’t be as much.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:33 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
you think Alexei can be average in CF?
anything to keep Owens out of CF though really.
Sober, I was appalled at the women. Drunk I was told I danced with them all.
by colintj on Jan 6, 2009 11:14 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Nope -
I think for a period he can make up for instinct with physical ability… but I think overall he would fall short. He’d never be a Rob M. or Griffrey of last season though.
Though I agree – anything to keep Jessie out of center… btw – Pods is available!
Replacing "Chicago Tough" with "Cuban Pride"
by Brush Back on Jan 6, 2009 1:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
damn you vesting options!!!!
The Oakland Athletics and free agent first baseman and designated hitter Jason Giambi are on the verge of agreeing on a one-year deal with an option for 2010, sources told ESPN The Magazine’s Buster Olney.
The deal would pay Giambi, who started his major league career in Oakland, $5.25 million in 2009 with a $4 million base salary for the option year in 2010. The second year would also provide for a $1.25 million buyout.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:27 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
Seems fair
why are you upset with the 2010 option?
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:33 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
i was referring to the white sox and, by extension, the phillies.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:34 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Thomer
got it.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:36 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
the comeuppance on thome is quite steep this year.
of course, the very nature of vesting options is that you’re paying a good part of it for past performance so it probably helps blunt the blow to think of some of it as deferred compensation.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 10:42 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
True
but it sure hurts when you are paying a large sum for a year that could be a very down year.
Are the Sox on the hook for the entire salary in 2009?
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 10:49 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
yes, sox have already used all the philly money
the mlbtr guy said mark gonzales told him so
ps. it would make sense to use it all in years thome was guaranteed to be on the sox, yes?
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 1:13 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Totally makes sense
but, I didn’t know if that was the way the agreement was ironed out.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 1:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Sox Centerfield
Freddie Garcia is an option as long as he is married to Ozzie’s niece. Anyone in the room think Rocco Baldelli solves the Sox problems in center. He fits the profile: History of injuries, underachiever, etc. Probably can be picked up cheap.
Chip Ramsey
by chipramsey on Jan 6, 2009 11:11 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
I like Baldelli
and I think he would be a great option. Not sure how cheap though. I wouldn’t mind Mulder getting a look for a year if his shoulder checked out.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:18 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
larry?
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:26 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Well, looks like all of us but larry move up
a spot on the Forbes list. larry is ranked in the high 20’s already. Also, the Cubs lose out on another potential bidder.
German billionaire kills self, family saysStory Highlights
Adolf Merckle was No. 94 on Forbes list of world’s richest people
(CNN) — German billionaire Adolf Merckle, one of the richest men in the world, committed suicide Monday after his business empire got into trouble in the wake of the international financial crisis, Merckle’s family said Tuesday in a statement.
Merckle, 74, was hit by a train in the southwestern town of Ulm, police said.
His family said the economic crisis had “broken” Merckle.
He was number 94 on the Forbes list of the world’s richest people, with a net worth estimated at $9.2 billion.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:36 AM CST reply actions 0 recs
tough day for billionaires.
pohlad and merckle.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 11:38 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
That is two Germans
I know with the first name Adolf that have committed suicide!
Remind me never to name my child Adolf, it just never turns out good for those guys.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 11:40 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
lol
or the French!
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:27 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
sheesh
he should have had the money to get hit by a private jet or a yacht.
Hobos get hit by trains.
I'm like a laser, six-string razor. I've got a mouth like an alligator
by Nordhagen on Jan 6, 2009 11:57 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
And drunks.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 12:03 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
a guy who has made billions obviously is smart enough to know that it's better to get something paid for by other people instead of by himself.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 12:05 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
But doesn't know enough to not tie his self-worth to money.
Nate Silver, take note. You POS.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 12:15 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
So, he couldn't go on living with only $500,000,000 in the bank?
Dumbass.
"There will be surgery. It will heal. It will heal fast."- Carlos Quentin on NBC 5 News Chicago (9/5/08)
by tailgater on Jan 6, 2009 4:48 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
perhaps he couldn't go on living knowing the fraud he'd committed...
recession uncovers what auditors don’t…
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 4:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
This pisses me off. I get that you have an ego and all, but seriously....I hate when people use trains for suicide.
Don’t kill yourself in a manner that is going to inconvenience thousands of people.
Go to your basement and do it quietly. And preferable cleanly, for the person who has to find you.
sheesh.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Jan 6, 2009 7:11 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Take an Alteril
“It’s like 3 sleeping pills in one.”
I always think to myself, self, who needs three sleeping pills in one? Suicide attempters that’s who!
AIM: SouthSideCheat
by The Cheat on Jan 6, 2009 7:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm worried about you, Cheat.
WAY too much thought into this. We gotta keep this site value above $50K or Cheat starts watching slepy-time commercials a bit too closely.
;)
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 8:18 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
You gotta read the fine print
They enroll you in “Triple Advantage” or Girls Gone WIld type subscription system
Not only do you get a weeks supply of “3 sleeping pills in one” but they start sending you a months supply, billing your credit card the appropriate amount…
I also like the ShamWOW commercial… At one point the spazzy announcer hold the ShamWOW up and says “This one lasts” at which point the ShamWOW covers his mouth, his voice changes completely, and finishes the though “10 years” with his mouth obscured.
AIM: SouthSideCheat
by The Cheat on Jan 6, 2009 8:40 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I love that ShamWOW one, too.
Especially his headset, since it is totally important he keep broadcasting when both hands are squeezing the life out of the ShamWOW. I mean, he chokes the shit out of it. And it comes back for more. For only $19.95!
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 8:45 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
And here I was, just composing a message to you to call Cheat's mom immediately for intervening...
(her number’s on the “emergency contact list” on the fridge, under the 2008 Ken Griffey Jr. collector’s edition magnet.)….
and you know what ShamWOW is. I must seek out this ad now…. I don’t watch enough late night tv, apparently. Naturally, I’ve got the early sleeping patterns that only a daughter of Chiburb would possess.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Jan 6, 2009 8:50 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I usually wake up at 1 or 2.
I have become an expert on reverse mortgages offered via Bob Wagner/Jimmy Garner, too.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 8:52 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
pay special attention to his voice as the shamWOW covers his mouth
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwRISkyV_B8
AIM: SouthSideCheat
by The Cheat on Jan 6, 2009 8:52 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
This ain't the Zapruder film, Cheat.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 8:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
frame 137
there it is
back and to the left
AIM: SouthSideCheat
by The Cheat on Jan 6, 2009 8:54 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Goddamn - you are all over this.
I never noticed it before.
(Rips up check for $19.95 plus S/H.)
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 8:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
That's because you are wine drunk every time it airs.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Jan 6, 2009 9:00 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Wow. That is horrible editing.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Jan 6, 2009 9:00 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
based on this description, I picture ShamWOW to be a fuzzy little creature.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Jan 6, 2009 8:51 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
That would be colin.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 8:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
ah, now I get it. At first, I thought the ShamWOW had a mouth, and covered it.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Jan 6, 2009 9:01 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
And the hits keep on coming...
The herd continues to thin itself:
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123127267562558295.html
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 9:22 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Gonna be a bitch
getting the blood out of that Jaguar’s interior.
Weighing in on the infomercials…I do like the ShamWOW spaz, but I’m also a Snuggie fan:
https://www.getsnuggie.com/flare/next
The Snuggie eliminates the need for keeping warm with inconvenient, old-fashioned blankets. And the red ones make you look like a really neat cult member! And they’ll send me 2 for the price of 1 (as long as I pay an extra &7.95 in P&H). What a deal!
"There will be surgery. It will heal. It will heal fast."- Carlos Quentin on NBC 5 News Chicago (9/5/08)
by tailgater on Jan 6, 2009 11:18 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Does that come in black?
“Play the role of Death in warmth and comfort!”
Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?
by UribeAuction on Jan 6, 2009 11:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I actually know someone with the Snuggie.
I had to take a picture of it just to prove someone I knew actually bought one.
by Grinder in Training on Jan 7, 2009 11:12 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Are they a monk, or just retarded?
(Sorry if it’s a relative. I’m just sayin’…)
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 7, 2009 11:26 AM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I’m not insulted.. I felt the same way. I was stunned.. and ashamed to be their friend at the same time.
by Grinder in Training on Jan 7, 2009 3:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
The Slanket comes in more colors and is heavier weight. And was the original.
Why so serious?
by reardenmettle on Jan 7, 2009 5:29 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Signing Pedro
I’d be entirely for that move and I think it’s a risk worth taking.
by shaftr on Jan 6, 2009 12:07 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
Wait - this is 2 comments in one month, shaftr.
Your computer is going to explode. Be very careful!
;)
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 12:14 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
LOL!
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 1:15 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I used two different computers
so I’m safe.
by shaftr on Jan 6, 2009 1:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I smell an age discrimination suit...
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 1:35 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
too bad most of them aren't old enough, huh.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 1:43 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
It's all relative.
>35 is old, especially to you, snot-nosed boy.
But, really, in a profession where physical skills are of paramount importance, and are so finely tuned, this is news? These guys aren’t “knowledge centers” or anything. If they were, they’d be managing. This whole subject was addressed in an earlier treatise. Bad economy + old DH-type guys with little capabilities of putting fannies in seats = Out To Pasture.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 1:48 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
a hard economy weeds out the weaklings
increases the fitness of the population.
Sober, I was appalled at the women. Drunk I was told I danced with them all.
by colintj on Jan 6, 2009 1:49 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
i was sort of responding seriously to your non-serious post.
it’s not relative. it’s the law.
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 1:50 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I know. 40 is the cut-off.
It’s a recession for your ilk, too – we can start a new wave of class-action suits and keep a few attorneys out of the bread lines. Besides, 40 is the new 30.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 1:56 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Either way, you're still over the hill old man.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 1:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Ewwwe
Not sure the smell he would give off….
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 2:10 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Victory.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 2:33 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
or 6 month old tuna fish.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 2:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
No, that's your wife.
Ba da BING.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 3:11 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Touche', ya old fart.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 3:14 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
That's what everyone says when they turn 40. OPOS.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Jan 6, 2009 7:13 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
two Ls but two Ws too
http://www.baseball-reference.com/sotd/archives/969
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 1:36 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
'Roberts rumors simply more Internet madness'
Williams did admit to the Sun-Times in May that he inquired about Roberts and the asking price at that time was Alexei Ramirez, Josh Fields and either John Danks or Floyd. He obviously said no thanks.
http://blogs.suntimes.com/whitesox/2009/01/roberts_rumors_simply_more_int.html
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 1:43 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
was that a Twitter too?
"A good cigar is like a beautiful chick with a great body who also knows the American League box scores. "
Klinger
by Chiburb on Jan 6, 2009 2:01 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Been since December 10th
since we had a Cowley Twitter. My withdrawal symptoms are getting worse.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 2:08 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
see rhythm for a temporary fix
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 2:17 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Andy McPhail is out of his fucking mind.
I am going to laugh when Andy can’t trade him and gets nothing. Now, that is holding onto your pocket aces for too long!
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:30 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
couple projections from the transaction oracle
2009 ZiPS Projection – Pat Burrell
—————————————————————————————————————-
AB R H 2B 3B HR RBI BB SO SB BA OBP SLG OPS+
—————————————————————————————————————-
2009 499 72 125 28 2 27 84 101 131 0 .251 .376 .477 118
http://www.baseballthinkfactory.org/files/oracle/discussion/rays_signed_burrell/
2009 ZiPS Projection – Pat Burrell
—————————————————————————————————————-
AB R H 2B 3B HR RBI BB SO SB BA OBP SLG OPS+
—————————————————————————————————————-
2009 499 72 125 28 2 27 84 101 131 0 .251 .376 .477 118
—————————————————————————————————————-
Top Comps: Ralph Kiner, Gorman Thomas, Bob Bailey, Jay Buhner, Greg Luzinski
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 2:40 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
LOL!
http://www.baseballthinkfactory.org/images/uploads/article/devilrays.JPG
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 2:44 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
larry wrote that
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 2:56 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Nice projections...
…also like the comparison to Greg Luzinski! HUH?!
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 2:55 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Tribe = Punto this winter.
Ruthlessly pricking our gonfalon bubble.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 2:51 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
26 starts the last 4 years
AIM: SouthSideCheat
by The Cheat on Jan 6, 2009 2:53 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I'da taken a flier on him. Not for $1.5MM, but WTF.
His first couple of games back he looked pretty good. Interesting that B-R has his stats compared to Jose Contreras (#10).
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 3:10 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
$1.5 mil guaranteed?
2:21pm: Crasnick says the Indians signed Pavano to a one-year deal. He gets $1.5MM guaranteed plus another $5.3MM in possible incentives, according to Troy Renck.
http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2009/01/indians-in-seri.html
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 2:56 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
didn't RTFA!
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 2:58 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Effin' kids.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 3:10 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
further proof that the Indians are going to suck once again.
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:31 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
re: floyd-roberts
TUESDAY, 11:31am: Jon Heyman’s take on this does not seem to gel with the info the White Sox put out there about not talking to the Orioles:
The trade talks between the Orioles and White Sox regarding excellent leadoff hitter Brian Roberts stalled over Baltimore’s request for at least one player in addition to young starting pitcher Gavin Floyd. "They wanted Floyd plus,’’ one person familiar with the talks said.
http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2009/01/white-sox-and-o.html
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 3:04 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
No thanks
Unless it was Greg Walker…but still, no thanks.
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 3:06 PM CST up reply actions 1 recs
lol
rec’d!
So, if I am reading the two options correctly . . .
we can either a) keep dye or b) trade dye . . . is that you Phil Rogers?
by jc2313 on Dec 11, 2008 4:53 PM CST up reply recommended Unrec 1
by Where Triples Go to Die on Jan 6, 2009 6:32 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
seven teams interested in smoltz?
http://mlb.mlb.com/news/article.jsp?ymd=20081210&content_id=3711622&vkey=news_det&fext=.jsp
maybe the sox are one of them?
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Jan 6, 2009 3:12 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
We are really looking for some action
Maybe Pedro, maybe Smoltz…come on something!!!!! Maybe an updated Cowley twitter on hotel bathroom q-tips.
Something!
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 3:15 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
12/10/08 news, Wiz?
I mean, Jeez. Hit “refresh” once in a while, will ya?
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 3:17 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I just realized that myself
I gotta lay off the whiskey
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 3:19 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
And the 6 month old tuna fish, POS.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 3:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Watch it, Mr. Viagra bomb(s).
"Jenks, who was never afraid to say "no" to a hamburger..."
by BobbySouthSide on Jan 6, 2009 3:26 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Milton Bradley made a Mr. T board game.
This game is based on the mid-80’s cartoon of the same name, where Mr. T coached a gymnastics team made up of teens (who also used their gymnastics to fight crime).
Mr. T’s Gymnastics Team has to get to the airport before the clock runs out (and presumably the flight leaves). Each member of the team has three errands they have to complete – pick up their gym suit from the dry cleaners, say goodbye to the team mascot, stop by the police station to report a crime and so on. Along the way, players can land on spaces with red stars that inflict random punishments and rewards on them.
Only through clever use of the team bus and careful planning to get from errand to errand can the player beat the rest of the team to the plane.
from here
awesome
How much is that Uribe in the window?
by thecip on Jan 6, 2009 3:21 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
why are they leaving the mascot behind
sit*
by U-God on Jan 6, 2009 3:29 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
He is a fool that needs to be pitied, perhaps??
How much is that Uribe in the window?
by thecip on Jan 6, 2009 4:06 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
blago wins.
and so does the constitution. the rout looks to be on.
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/politics/sns-ap-senate-burris,0,5319121.story
by larry on Jan 6, 2009 5:01 PM CST reply actions 0 recs
We will see
Burris has been doing a good job of defending himself
by 815Sox on Jan 6, 2009 7:21 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
He has done nothing wrong
Plus he has the ultimate trump card if the Senate wants to make things hard.
Vinny Del Negro interviewed for the job today. I mean come on! Nobody else thinks this is nuts?
by Juiceboxjerry on Jun 6, 2008 4:21 PM CDT actions actions 0 recs
by Ozzie Montana on Jan 6, 2009 10:47 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
I agree with Feinstein!?
Hell has dropped to 32 degrees.
I would rather douse a newspaper in gasoline, wrap it around my penis and light it on fire then relive that experience
by armedpp on Aug 29, 2007 2:36 AM EDT
by winningugly on Jan 6, 2009 8:20 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
it's amazing what politicians can talk themselves into
Illinois Secretary of State Jesse White said this morning he has been made “the fall guy” by the U.S. Senate, which he said is using him as an excuse to not seat Roland Burris.
“They could have seated him without my signature; my signature is not required,” he told WGN-AM 720’s John Williams.
The Senate barrred Burris Tuesday, saying he lacked proper credentials because his appointment was not signed by White.
But White said today, “My signature is mostly ceremonial, rather than a point of law.”
“They played a little bit of a game with [Burris] yesterday,” he added.
Asked by Williams if he had been made “the fall guy,” White said, “You’re absolutely correct.”
White said he had pledged, shortly after Gov. Rod Blagojevich was accused of trying to make a deal for his appointment to the Senate seat, to not sign off on anyone selected by Blagojevich. And he said he will continue to honor that pledge unless ordered otherwise by a court.
Yet at the same time he said he thought Burris should be admitted to the Senate and said he had the highest possible regard for him. He predicted Burris eventually will be seated.
http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/2009/01/jesse-white-ive-been-made-the-fall-guy.html
so basically white is grand-standing and we get to foot the bill for this to go to court. wonderful.
by larry on Jan 7, 2009 12:40 PM CST up reply actions 0 recs
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
Related FanPosts on South Side Sox
Related FanShots on South Side Sox
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Recommended FanPosts
Recent FanPosts
FanShots
Quick hits of video, photos, quotes, chats, links and lists that you find around the web.
Recommended FanShots
Recent FanShots
Follow SouthSideSox
Certain photos copyright © 2009 by Associated Press or Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Associated Press and Getty Images is strictly prohibited.
