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Sox Bludgeon Padres 15-4

All in all, today was one of the best games the Sox have played all spring.  I'm not sure that counts for much though because it came against the Padres, who are quickly becoming the punchline of Major League Baseball.  Even with that qualifier, this game gave us a lot of things that make us happy, especially pictures of great defense

610x_medium

Which this is not.


 

Star-divide

On offense, pretty much everything went right.  The Sox scored at least one run in innings 2-7, with a 6 run fourth being the best.  The team sent eleven batters to the plate before the away half of the frame mercifully came to an end.  Lillibridge went 2-5 with a double.  Pierzynski went 2-4 with a run and one driven in as well.  Gavin Floyd recorded a hit and a walk, scoring both times. The best outings belonged to Paul Konerko, Josh Fields, and DeWayne Wise.  A strangely beardless Konerko went 3-4 with a solo-homerun and three driven in.  Fields went 3-3 with a double and a walk.  And perhaps most importantly, DeWayne Wise continued to nail Jerry Owens' coffin shut.  Wise went 2-6, with four RBI and a two-run shot in the fifth.  Hell, even Brian Anderson did his part, taking Greg Burke yard in the sixth.  Owens managed to go 1-5, with a strikeout and leaving four on base.  Jerry, it wasn't all that nice knowing you.

 

The pitching was fairly solid as well, with only John Van Benschoten pretending to be Mike MacDougal, giving up two runs on three hits in one inning of work.  MacDougal was actually effective, striking out two in a perfect fifth.  Gavin Floyd pitched well in his four innings, allowing two hits, two runs, and one walk while striking out four.  One of those was a homerun to his surname buddy, Cliff Floyd.  Egbert, Link, and Russell also pitched, but none of the outings were good or bad enough to merit much writing.

 

Things are looking pretty good, as the Sox are sitting at .500 (8-8) with about four weeks to go until the games actually mean something.

 

 

And once again going completely off topic, but seeing as I'm an editor I can, one of my best friends from back home is going to be on "Good Morning America" tomorrow morning.  His name is Brett Westcott and he's a Sophomore Civil Engineering student at Purdue.  He is one of "The Compliment Guys", and after the Tribune and WGN picked up their story, ABC decided to fly him and his friend out to New York to be on the show tomorrow, giving out compliments in Times Square.  It'll be on at 7, and thank you for tolerating me slipping away from baseball.

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Completely off topic

But that’s a funny ass article on the compliment guys.

It's called Sex Panther by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... Yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.

They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time it works, every time.

by ElDiablo on Mar 13, 2009 11:23 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Konerko...

looks like the type that has a 5 o’clock shadow immediately after shaving.

"God knows I gave my best in baseball at all times and no man on earth can truthfully judge me otherwise."

by Shoeless In SC on Mar 13, 2009 11:29 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

We don't have compliment guys at Missouri...

But we do have Brother Jed, the crazy religious guy who says gays/lesbians/fornicators/masturbators/hippies/people who like rock & roll/etc. are going to hell.

Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?

by UribeAuction on Mar 14, 2009 12:43 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Speaker's Circle?

EVERYBODY PICK US FOR 3RD OR 4TH SO I DINK WE DOIN POOTY GOO
Sox Machine

by Sox Machine on Mar 14, 2009 6:28 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yep, but only when it's warm out

I guess hell and all that noise isn’t important when it’s cold and icy.

Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?

by UribeAuction on Mar 14, 2009 11:54 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

we get him as well

about twice a year. fun guy

But Frank Thomas was always his own guy, he always lived by some sort of code that wasn’t especially clear to anyone but him.

by U-God on Mar 14, 2009 7:09 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

He just plays off the people who try to argue with him

He’d go away if everybody ignored him, but he’s too damn entertaining sometimes.

Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?

by UribeAuction on Mar 14, 2009 11:56 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

were you around for preacher dan?

"KenWO
no point in arguing with people who are blinded from reality..."
by Where Triples Go to Die on Nov 29, 2008 6:49 PM

by Illini0509 on Mar 16, 2009 6:02 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

kudos to the compliment guys

I'm like a laser, six-string razor. I've got a mouth like an alligator

by Nordhagen on Mar 14, 2009 3:01 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

And thanks again for supporting them guys

I appreciate it

But Frank Thomas was always his own guy, he always lived by some sort of code that wasn’t especially clear to anyone but him.

by U-God on Mar 14, 2009 7:21 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Great Article

What good souls, that’s sincerely heartwearming. These guys are building up massive reserves of good karma, make sure you stay close to them!

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 14, 2009 8:02 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

oh no worries

been friends with Westy since 4th grade and have no intents on bailin on it anytime soon. we just got a canoe last month that we plan on using a few times a week this summer. weird thing is, he was supposed to go here but didn’t get accepted for engineering so he went to Purdue instead. none of this would have come to fruition if he had gotten in here. i already landed him two newspaper interviews back in plainfield and joliet for when he gets back from new york.

But Frank Thomas was always his own guy, he always lived by some sort of code that wasn’t especially clear to anyone but him.

by U-God on Mar 14, 2009 8:10 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Kind of odd when you think about it

Two kids getting national publicity just because they’re being super nice – who knows, it’s such an unusual phenomenon that they might become as newsworthy as the Octomom.

Speaking of souls, heaven hell etc and to stray further OT – anyone read the 19th century Russian novel “Dead Souls” by Gogol? My favorite novel of all time, I’ve reread at least 4 times. Laugh out loud funny – the humor would appeal to a lot of the audience on SSS, especially the college crowd.

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 14, 2009 8:27 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

i will give it a look over spring break in two weeks

but yeah, when GMA contacted him yesterday he started freaking out. there were no plans for it to get this big.

But Frank Thomas was always his own guy, he always lived by some sort of code that wasn’t especially clear to anyone but him.

by U-God on Mar 14, 2009 8:30 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

New York on expense account, good times

Which hotel are they staying at?

Dead Souls is aood spring break book, I usually reread it when I’ve got an overseas flight or beach vacation. If you haven’t read a Russian novel before they can be a little intimidating at first because everyone’s got these intense names with the patronymics – helpful to read this explanation of Russian Patronymics beforehand. Once you get into the rhythm of the book the patronymics become part of the appeal.

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 14, 2009 8:42 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

well i read crime and punishment

so the names shouldn’t be a problem. and i’m not sure what hotel it is, i just know its right across from ABC studios

But Frank Thomas was always his own guy, he always lived by some sort of code that wasn’t especially clear to anyone but him.

by U-God on Mar 14, 2009 8:47 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Oh yeah

If you like Dostoyesky you’ll love this, Gogol predated him and was a strong influence.

Once you finish that put “The Master and Margarita” by Bulghakov on the list. Satan leaves Chichikov behind and visits 1920’s Soviet Moscow.

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 14, 2009 8:52 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

i like that there has been one post even remotely about baseball so far

saturday mornings on SSS, gotta love em

But Frank Thomas was always his own guy, he always lived by some sort of code that wasn’t especially clear to anyone but him.

by U-God on Mar 14, 2009 8:54 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Mid March of spring training

There’s a limit to how thoroughly you can parse the Owens-Wise struggle

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 14, 2009 8:57 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

M and M is a great novel

Had to read it for a Russian Lit class a few years ago along with The Brothers Karamazov and Anna Karenina. Really great reading.

Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...

by Hazymania on Mar 14, 2009 4:49 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

The chapters in Jerusalem

with Pontius Pilate just blow me away, amazing stuff.

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 15, 2009 7:14 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

the Marriott Marquis in Times Square, mebbe?

love that place. I used to stay there when I was consulting in NYC. The only way I could afford it was by making a fake IBM id, and using their corporate rate.

I'm like a laser, six-string razor. I've got a mouth like an alligator

by Nordhagen on Mar 14, 2009 1:00 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

I guarantee you'll like it

There’s nothing subtle about Russian characters. Everyone is wildly passionate, emotions on full boil all the time. Men going into murderous rages over some woman they just have to have, and plenty of alcohol to lubricate it all.

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 15, 2009 7:12 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Karma

bollocks, they just want to get their end away

I want a strawberry spinke

by hoodlight on Mar 14, 2009 8:39 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

But they say that they're motives are pure

and they’re hearts are chaste!

Wilder Bilked Money from Sox to Fund Struggling Gay Bar

by ChicagoPete on Mar 14, 2009 8:42 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

nice grammar

them guys works, it should catch on…

Gordon Beckham 1.055 OPS so far this spring

by e-gus on Mar 14, 2009 1:10 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

i should have used a comma

i meant thank you for supporting them, guys. the guys being you all

But Frank Thomas was always his own guy, he always lived by some sort of code that wasn’t especially clear to anyone but him.

by U-God on Mar 14, 2009 4:08 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Good morning, y'all.

Just found out that Lillibridge’s dad goes to the same gym as me.
I was fully aware that little Brent was from here, but had no idea his dad was on the elliptical machine next to me.

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Mar 14, 2009 10:58 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

You should do an interview you can't post.

EVERYBODY PICK US FOR 3RD OR 4TH SO I DINK WE DOIN POOTY GOO
Sox Machine

by Sox Machine on Mar 14, 2009 10:59 AM CDT up reply actions   1 recs

Oh.

I usually don’t allow them to talk.

...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.

by homesickalien on Mar 14, 2009 11:05 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

wait, that's what he meant?

well, i’m out then.

Cashing checks and having sex.

by MarketMaker on Mar 14, 2009 1:07 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

OT (do I really have to say that?)

Deaths of gamers leave their online lives in limbo

Be courteous before you die, and set up a service that will alert the SSS community of your passing. It will prevent a lot of needless “what-ever-happened-to-so-and-so” conversation.

I'm like a laser, six-string razor. I've got a mouth like an alligator

by Nordhagen on Mar 14, 2009 1:11 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

I certainly would not want HSA's pimp to make an account just to tell us about her deportation to Ukraine

Confusion breeds success. If they don't know each other, opponents can't have strategy. GENIUS.

by Ozzie Montana on Mar 14, 2009 1:15 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

you not say ukraine weak!

i take your board and i smash it!

Cashing checks and having sex.

by MarketMaker on Mar 14, 2009 2:07 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

i hear that. wouldn't want mariner fans hanging out around here

I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.

by thatshortkid on Mar 14, 2009 6:24 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Venezuela's up on the Netherlands 2-1 in the fifth

You know the Netherlands don’t have much offense when they can’t hit Carlos Silva.

Chicago White Sox Examiner — Your what hurts?

by UribeAuction on Mar 14, 2009 1:14 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

more OT

opposite of compliment guys, a solid baseball prank-

link

Gordon Beckham 1.280 OPS so far this spring

by e-gus on Mar 14, 2009 1:26 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

ozzie on egbert
“We’re keeping a close eye on him because of the arm problems he’s had in the past,” manager Ozzie Guillen said. “But he continues to impress everyone. Every minute we have, we talk about him. We want to see what he can do. This kid’s problem is health. If he stays healthy … that’s the first time I’ve seen him in spring training throw the ball that well.”

http://www.dailyherald.com/story/?id=279027

The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.

by The Wizard on Mar 14, 2009 2:10 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Curses are but the Province of Losers

http://www.sox35th.com/index.php/587/curses-are-but-the-province-of-losers

The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.

by The Wizard on Mar 14, 2009 2:13 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

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