A Thread In Which SSSers Can Make Baseless Predictions And/Or Post Pictures of Rally Car-Driving Unicorns
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 2:09 PM CDT
186 comments
So we don't have a White Sox game to watch today. The world is bleak.
But there is baseball on the horizon. And we shall make expert prognostications within this thread. And the world shall be less bleak.
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Sox season: 87 wins.
"I never had sex with that Governor" -
Roland Burris
by Chiburb on Apr 6, 2009 2:13 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Of course what's wrong with this prediction is that...
what made last year so satisfying was the LACK of expectation. Now that I have some, I’m afraid we’re in for an ‘07 type season. But then maybe I’m the anti-stan?
"I never had sex with that Governor" -
Roland Burris
by Chiburb on Apr 6, 2009 2:28 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I do hate mimes.
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 6, 2009 2:14 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
beauty.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 2:42 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i was a mime in high school
i suck - the sox dont - SSH2005
by BoeJouma on Apr 6, 2009 2:54 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
no. a mime is when you don't talk, not when no one talks to you.
Cashing checks and having sex.
by MarketMaker on Apr 6, 2009 2:58 PM CDT up reply actions 11 recs
haha zing!!
i suck - the sox dont - SSH2005
by BoeJouma on Apr 6, 2009 3:01 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
This was hilarious. But Hazy deserves a green too, dammit.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 3:17 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
If it went through the mime's posterior, yes.
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 3:22 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Use your imagination!
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 3:24 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
that LL thread is hilarious!
Zduriencik said that when you look at Aumont’s size, most notably his 6-foot-7 height, it lends itself to being a top-of-the-line reliever.WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN
So, Randy Johnson should have been relegated to the ’pen as well, eh?
We’re going to have no starters and 12 relievers.
6 pitchers per game!
PERFECT!Revolutionary!
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Apr 6, 2009 2:22 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Dusty Baker
will allow a starter who missed part of last year with an arm injury to throw 114 pitches on opening day . . . oh wait . . .
by jc2313 on Apr 6, 2009 2:24 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
you act surprised by this some how
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 6, 2009 5:49 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Soccer Player Receives Yellow Card For Farting
http://deadspin.com/5200335/soccer-player-receives-yellow-card-for-farting
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Apr 6, 2009 2:34 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Hank Blalock - get in
in my fantasy team!
I believe the common character of the universe is not harmony, but chaos, hostility, and murder.
by hoodlight on Apr 6, 2009 2:36 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
White Sox outright Wassermann to Triple-A Charlotte
The White Sox outrighted reliever Ehren Wassermann to Triple-A Charlotte.
The move clears another place on the 40-man roster, which now stands at 38.
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Apr 6, 2009 2:36 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I live 15 mins from the ballpark...
…and it’s been sunny all day. I saw like 4 snowflakes at one point. Meanwhile it’s been raining in Cincy the whole game and they are playing… this sucks.
Bucky's 5th Quarter. SB Nation's Wisconsin Badgers community.
by Adam Hoge on Apr 6, 2009 2:37 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, what does Skilling know anyway.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 2:44 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Last check with Guillen, he was leaning to going with Colon in the 4, and Contreras the 5.
http://twitter.com/cst_sox/statuses/1464549537
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Apr 6, 2009 2:38 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
does it matter?
I can lead you to 4 Wisdom, but I can't free your brain from the evil of Punto.
by colintj on Apr 6, 2009 2:41 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
are those horses at Pimlico?
"I never had sex with that Governor" -
Roland Burris
by Chiburb on Apr 6, 2009 2:45 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
silly chiburb.
pimlico hasn’t opened yet. dover downs.
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 2:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i can't wait to get out to arlington when it warms up.
i love the ponies.
Cashing checks and having sex.
by MarketMaker on Apr 6, 2009 3:12 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
So did Catherine the Great.
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 3:13 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 3:32 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
reminds me of Transmet:
SJ: “Got a name there?”
Bill: “Eeeehhhh… well, there’s a story in that. Y’see that stage there? Buncha years back, I designed that, built it m’self. But do they call me Bill the stagebuilder? Naaa… Y’see these doors? It was sixteen years ago I fixed them up, but do they call me Bill the handyman? Naaaa… wrote these floor guides, but do they call me bill the guide? Naaaa…”
Voice: “Hey! Bill Chimpfucker!”
Bill: “Eeeehhhh (…) It was only the once, pretty lady.”
I can lead you to 4 Wisdom, but I can't free your brain from the evil of Punto.
by colintj on Apr 6, 2009 6:10 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i thought of the same joke
but it involved some Scottish guy fucking a goat or something. i could not remember what movie or show it was from for the life of me. if anyone else knows it, please indulge.
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 6:22 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
always with the Scots fucking goats with you
I can lead you to 4 Wisdom, but I can't free your brain from the evil of Punto.
by colintj on Apr 6, 2009 6:31 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
SJ = Spider Jerusalem
for those unawares
I can lead you to 4 Wisdom, but I can't free your brain from the evil of Punto.
by colintj on Apr 6, 2009 6:31 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Cleveland getting their heads kicked in
me likey
by Crede's Crew on Apr 6, 2009 2:54 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
yeah, 12smthing ERA for C Lee ... hmmm
by LT_sox_fan on Apr 6, 2009 2:55 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
rofl
who was i getting into an argument with over him regressing? I know you are out there, speak up!
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 3:59 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 4:02 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i don't think it was you.
I will have to go home and search the threads. It was recently when I was explaining why the Indians would suck this year.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:11 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
LOL. You existentialist, you.
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 7:35 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
to be more exact
IP H R ER BB K HR ERA
C. Lee 5.0 10 7 7 1 5 1 12.60
by LT_sox_fan on Apr 6, 2009 2:58 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Indispensible.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 3:08 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
i love that
i dislike men, you don't know what the hell you want out of life.
by pierzynskirules on Apr 6, 2009 5:59 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Yes
"I never had sex with that Governor" -
Roland Burris
by Chiburb on Apr 6, 2009 6:44 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i don't time for patronizing
so get your life together
i dislike men, you don't know what the hell you want out of life.
by pierzynskirules on Apr 6, 2009 8:20 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
word
I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.
by thatshortkid on Apr 6, 2009 8:53 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
What do you time for?
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 7, 2009 10:18 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
doing what i'm doing
i’m going to be a RMA, not nobody stupidity. its a new year: get over it
i dislike men, you don't know what the hell you want out of life.
by pierzynskirules on Apr 7, 2009 12:17 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
a wha?
a risk manager?
oh, now i see it: rubber manufacturer
I don’t want my beer to taste like fruit or honey. I want pussy to taste that way.
by thatshortkid on Apr 7, 2009 6:30 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Why would we prognosticate
when China haircuts it by 3-4 games? Fer Chrissakes.
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 3:11 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I thawt I saw a unicorns.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 3:30 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
My buddy and I were working out at the Y on Saturday.
I was doing hamstring curls when my buddy says “Hey, how’s it going”. I look up to see a full-grown guy in a rabbit suit – like effing Harvey – walking silently past us. No one else said a thing. I haven’t laughed so hard all year. I was expecting Jimmy Stewart to follow this guy.
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 3:33 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Like these kids have a clue what you're prattling about.
Elwood P. Dowd is an endlessly pleasant & delightfully eccentric bachelor living in a small town that isn’t quite aware that its newest citizen is a 6’3" white rabbit named “Harvey,” that only certain people can see. After supposedly meeting this rabbit – its origins attributed to the Celtic legend of the Pooka – Dowd’s sanity is put into question by his equally eccentric sister.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0042546/synopsis
"I never had sex with that Governor" -
Roland Burris
by Chiburb on Apr 6, 2009 3:36 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
plus
thanks to the Village People, “working out with a buddy at the Y” can only mean one thing for most people.
I'm like a laser, six-string razor. I've got a mouth like an alligator
by Nordhagen on Apr 6, 2009 3:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, I didn't make it past the first sentence of WU's story before I was calling him a fag in my head.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 3:52 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
good title then.
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 3:54 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Ah, the innocence of the aged.
My grandparents still refer to galoshes as rubbers.
by The Actual El Guapo on Apr 6, 2009 3:54 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
aiding and abetting.
that guy was there to molest children. of course you didn’t say anything. that’s exactly what that sick fuck was counting on. “no one’s gonna say anything about a guy walking around in a bunny suit at a YMCA. i’ll be able to feel up whatever kids i want to feel up.”
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 3:36 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
That is pretty freaking hilarious.
I had a moment like that this year….a weekend in January.
It was a rare sunny winter day on the peninsula. I had just gotten out of the ocean, put on some dry clothes, walked back to the beach to enjoy the mild temps and sunshine.
While I was watching the waves, I glanced over to my right, and there was a stark naked dude drinking a beer and walking towards me.
It was probably only 50 degrees, but the sunshine made it feel like 70, and this guy was absorbing as much as he possibly could.
Aside from when he and a (clothed) friend decided to move a large piece of driftwood across the sand (watching a naked man schlep a giant log is a lot funnier than you can imagine), the best moment was when he was approached by a dog who wanted to play fetch. He took the ball and casually drop-kicked it down the beach for the dog.
Too much.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 4:04 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
+1
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 7:36 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Come to think of it....it looked like a Jewish penis.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 7:40 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I know the play/film thank youse very much
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 6, 2009 5:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I owed ya a greenie
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 6, 2009 5:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
But it's still white!!!!!!!! whhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!
;)
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 6:54 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I played my part!
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 6, 2009 8:11 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
It just wasn't good enough.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 8:17 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Thanks for the effort, though. =)
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 8:19 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
what a daddy's girl
you want a pretty pink hat to go with your unicorn?
I can lead you to 4 Wisdom, but I can't free your brain from the evil of Punto.
by colintj on Apr 6, 2009 10:07 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
But daddy I want an Oompa Loompa now!
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 7, 2009 10:19 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Bill Simmons w/ a gem
On his AL West & Central podcast, he is talking about Texas’ rotation and goes “Brandon McCarthy…who, ah man…they traded for him and gave up John Danks which is in the running for the worst deal of the decade” and his buddy goes “Ever.”
Found it amusing
by Crede's Crew on Apr 6, 2009 3:45 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
That trade was pre-SSS for me.
What was the general consensus on it at the time?
by onthemark12 on Apr 6, 2009 4:15 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
my consensus was WTF?
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:19 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i was obviously mistaken.
It was just such a bold move at the time I couldn’t believe it after how much the Sox hyped this guy up. I now know if the Sox start hyping someone up he is about to get traded.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:36 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
We also got Massett.
So it was pretty much a slam dunk from jump street.
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 7:37 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
We gave up "the future of the team"
Back then I thought the name of the pitcher was justified because Kenny was smoking that
Now I just sit back and say “there’s one of those crazy deals Kenny made that worked out again”
I hope I die on the field, I hope when I walk to change the pitcher, I drop dead and that's it."-Ozzie Guillen
by rangerjae on Apr 7, 2009 5:55 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
wiz almost killed himself.
his mom didn’t let him near any sharp objects for four months.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2006/12/23/145015/67
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 4:20 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
ooh, and a preston wilson discussion, too!
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 4:24 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Sorry Wiz...
i’m sure no one is going to sway you right now, so i’ll just say that we should have this conversation again in three or four years. i have a feeling you’ll have come around by then.
by larry on Dec 23, 2006 3:40 PM PST to parent up reply reply actions actions 0 recs
yes
let’s have it again in 3-4 years
I hope I’m proven wrong (to me bmac seems like a #2 guy)
HEY THIS IS JI
JIM THOME
THE PEORIA POUNDER
by The Wizard on Dec 23, 2006 3:56 PM PST to parent up reply reply actions actions 0 recs
by onthemark12 on Apr 6, 2009 4:28 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
sorry for what?
The greatest trick the White Sox ever pulled was convincing their fan base that "Ozzieball" ever existed.
by The Wizard on Apr 6, 2009 7:16 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i'm guessing the liquid diet your mother put you on to ensure you didn't try to kill yourself with a fork.
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 7:19 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Dayyyyyum
Larry ftw in that thread:
i’m basing my opinion – just like a lot of others with more knowledge than me (sickel, baseball america) – on his superior stuff. danks just has a bit better of a repetoire and, when he gets his control taken care of, i think he’ll end up being very good. i’ve always seen him rated as a #1-2 guy (probably closer to a 2) whereas BMac always was rated as a #2-4 (probably closer to a very good 3). we’ll see what actually happens.
as for masset, that’s like frosting on a brownie. not necessary but sure makes it taste better. he’ll be a guy to put in the back of the bullpen. my point was more that i probably would have taken BMac for danks straight up (i wouldn’t expect KW to do that, of course, but i’m a gambler) so getting even a bag of balls above that is good.
by CWSKeith on Apr 6, 2009 4:32 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
larry regrets this...
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:38 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i doubt it
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 4:39 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
"as for masset, that’s like frosting on a brownie" -lars
he regrets this statement.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 7, 2009 8:00 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
no. he got something more than danks. that was good.
plus, we wouldn’t have masset theory without that trade.
by larry on Apr 7, 2009 9:44 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, I wasn't on this site then either
I was at a Bulls game in Chicago and they announced it at halftime…my thought was, My God, Kenny has lost it…but I knew nothing of Danks at the time. I, along with many others, ate my words on that one.
by Crede's Crew on Apr 6, 2009 4:41 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I hated everything about it
It literally crushed my hopes and dreams as McCarthy was my favorite player at the time. I am pretty sure I broke my remote. I then listened to ESPN1000 for an hour or so just to try and calm myself down hearing about this new guy Danks. I even recall them getting McCarthy on the line to talk, and he was shocked himself.
my president is white.
by JoeCoolMan24 on Apr 6, 2009 10:58 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I just remember saying the six words that most Sox fans say when Kenny makes deals on the surface don't make much sense but end up being winners
What the fuck is going on?
I hope I die on the field, I hope when I walk to change the pitcher, I drop dead and that's it."-Ozzie Guillen
by rangerjae on Apr 7, 2009 5:57 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
lol!
The only time I have not said that, is when he traded for sweaty Freddy :)
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 7, 2009 8:01 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
that trade is how i found sss. i was looking for any analysis i could find...
and so i started lurking and learning.
Cashing checks and having sex.
by MarketMaker on Apr 6, 2009 5:31 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I posted on Opening Day last season
The umps blew the game for the Sox, yet SSH kept bitching how they couldn’t get a run in with the bases loaded and no one out, I knew I was home.
Confusion breeds success. If they don't know each other, opponents can't have strategy. GENIUS.
by Ozzie Montana on Apr 6, 2009 7:46 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO WIN THE WORLD SERIES BY LEADING THE LEAGUE IN HOME RUNS.
GO BACK TO WSI.
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 7:48 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Mark my words, we will miss him this season
HSA has been allowed to go unchecked without fear of degradation of digital harassment, Colin now thinks education is valuable as no one is calling him a jobless loser, and the Cubs are no longer valued.
Confusion breeds success. If they don't know each other, opponents can't have strategy. GENIUS.
by Ozzie Montana on Apr 6, 2009 7:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
interesting!
i too have noticed them getting a bit uppity…
by Trooper on Apr 6, 2009 7:57 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I used to put that mo-fo in his place and y'all know it.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 8:05 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Adam Jones is fuggin' goooood
+defender in CF with + speed and a (projected, eventually) above average bat? Damn… Baltimore is gonna have 2.5 superstars between Wieters, Markakis and Jones. If they can develop any of that pitching, they’re gonna be tough.
by CWSKeith on Apr 6, 2009 4:28 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
i was looking at Jones stats because I was interested in grabbing him as my 4th outfielder in my fantasy league.
They were not as impressive as I expected after hearing Hawk have a gasm over him.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:31 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
He's 23
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 4:34 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
cheat, you can either hit in the majors or you can't.
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 4:36 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I guess I didn't stress Age vs. League enough in the context piece ;-)
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 4:38 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
his career OBP sucks
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:39 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
define career
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 4:40 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
minor league career
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:40 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
.353 sucks?
http://www.baseball-reference.com/minors/player.cgi?id=jones-001ada
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 4:41 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
it's average.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 4:42 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Not for a guy who is 4-6 years younger than the league average age
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 4:44 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I am sorry, I looked up his MLB stats.
.301 OBP is terrible.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 5:28 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
nevermind that he was worth $10.1 mil
and only being paid .4
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 5:44 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
whatever dude,
Anderson projected into something pretty good too. How did that turn out for him thus far?
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 5:46 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
jones is both a better hitter and fielder than anderson
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 5:48 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Thank you for using that example
Anderson is smack dab in the middle of my next piece on the subject…. guess which side of the ledger he’s on
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 5:53 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
the "I am a piece of shit" side?
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 6:20 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
it's about .010 higher than average
plus the fact that he was doing that as a 21 year old in AAA
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 4:45 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
His middle name is La Marque?
Are you allowed to have 2 middle names? Can one of them be a definite article? Where are the lawyers?
by The Actual El Guapo on Apr 6, 2009 4:45 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i'll allow it.
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 4:46 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Point of fact.
It’s a tradition in Scottish culture to give male children two middle names — one for each grandfather.
by BridgeportJoe on Apr 6, 2009 5:26 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
He left the minors at 21!
AGE vs. LEAGUE!
I don’t think anyone is arguing that he’s gonna win a batting title or post a .400 OBP…
But you’re talking about a plus defensive CFer who has about a 40% chance of outperforming Jermaine Dye at the plate this season and a 75-80% chance next year.
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 4:44 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
somebody needs some baseball.
take a deep breath. maybe write one of those haikus you used to do about age v. league.
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 4:45 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
You can give a man a fork and a knife
You can show him the proper technique to cut a steak… but chances are he’s still gonna stick the fork in his eye and pick up the steak with his mitts
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 4:49 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
You should see me try to cut french toast.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 4:59 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
It's the gastronomical equivalent of
Elaine Bennis dancing.
"I never had sex with that Governor" -
Roland Burris
by Chiburb on Apr 6, 2009 5:46 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Very good. I was relying on your response here. And that is the best way I've ever heard it described.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 6:56 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i know you think everyone reads your posts.
we don’t. we just recommend it to make you feel good. they do the same thing to me.
"If they had this s--- when i was playing, I would have been the best f------ shortstop who ever lived." - Oswaldo Guillen
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 5:00 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
(and me)
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 5:01 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Poetry.
Arguing with a
Dolt about OBP is
A bad idea, Cheat.
by The Actual El Guapo on Apr 6, 2009 4:52 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Logic dead and gone
Its ghost haunts all our slumbers
Where triples have died
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 5:00 PM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
it's my honor to make that go green
by Crede's Crew on Apr 6, 2009 5:04 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
shit's changed
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 5:10 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
you must have missed the thread of rec'oning
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/3/820386/statistical-prospect-evaluation#comments
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 5:14 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
(Snort, cough.)
CHINA!!!!!!
Buncha wankers.
I WOULD KILL MYSELF BUT I CAN TAKE OUT SO MANY MORE PEOPLE IN A EXPLOSION
by Robert on Jun 23, 2008 5:22 PM PDT
by winningugly on Apr 6, 2009 7:41 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Think BA woulda had it?
Twitter: @SouthSideCheat
SouthSideSox on Facebook
by The Cheat on Apr 6, 2009 4:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
You want to put money on the 40%?
I have a pay pal account.
http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/4/2/819786/cactus-league-finale-white-sox-vs#13641879
by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 6, 2009 5:31 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I picked up Chris Young off the waiver wire, I should have grabbed Jones, he's long gone now.
by madvillian on Apr 6, 2009 4:52 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i drafted the mfer
I can lead you to 4 Wisdom, but I can't free your brain from the evil of Punto.
by colintj on Apr 6, 2009 6:24 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Basketball Hall of Fame Apparently Just Taking Everyone Now.
http://www.cbssports.com/nba/story/11599580
Corky Simpson has issued a formal protest and request for reconsideration.
by The Actual El Guapo on Apr 6, 2009 4:30 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Sick matchup tonight in Seattle
Liriano/Hernandez…wowzahs
by Crede's Crew on Apr 6, 2009 5:10 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
see the thing is
they have track records
well felix at least, i don’t think liriano will ever be the same
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 5:14 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Maybe not, but he was very tough down the stretch
Speaking of cliff lee’d, ouch Sabathia…prob happy they’re in Baltimore and not at home for that one
by Crede's Crew on Apr 6, 2009 5:18 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
webb
got worked too
4.2.09 - anno Cutler
by Illini0509 on Apr 6, 2009 5:20 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
HECK YES! (only they're in Minnesota)
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 6:57 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
fangraphs don't like us
http://www.fangraphs.com/blogs/index.php/ranking-the-minors-the-lowly-10
" Cheat I would like to become a managing editor. Email me what I need to do."-by Where Triples Go to Die on Apr 2, 2009 1:46 PM PDT
" You've got step one down. Sucking a lot of dick."- by The Cheat on Apr 2, 2009 1:58 PM PDT
by U-God on Apr 6, 2009 5:49 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Tell me why I should care.
Everyone and their mom takes a crap on the way the White Sox operate with their minor league talent, and every year it ends up not mattering.
by Daniel Berlyn on Apr 6, 2009 6:03 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
This young Jones has had quite an opener!
3-3, BB so far.
Quite impressive for someone so young. Somebody should do a piece on Age/League in terms of projection.
"I never had sex with that Governor" -
Roland Burris
by Chiburb on Apr 6, 2009 5:50 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Is there even a connection worth mentioning?
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 6:58 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Jason Motte is absolutely shitting the bed
there goes my BTB fantasy team
by Daniel Berlyn on Apr 6, 2009 6:08 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Yeah..
Good thing my opponent has Brandon Webb maybe I’ll have a chance.
by Grinder in Training on Apr 6, 2009 6:31 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Swisher
with a ground rule double
4.2.09 - anno Cutler
by Illini0509 on Apr 6, 2009 6:15 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
like clockwork, every spring
why did i keep him over berkman again?
by Ryno on Apr 6, 2009 6:37 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
i say that after having sworn him off
after owning him like 3 years in a row a while back
I can lead you to 4 Wisdom, but I can't free your brain from the evil of Punto.
by colintj on Apr 6, 2009 8:03 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I very much enjoyed Niehaus recounting game 163 against the White Sox.
Those were good times.
I’m drinking lots of beer and watching baseball. About to cook and watch some baseball and drink beer. I like today lots.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 8:07 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Cuddyer leaves Punto stranded at 3B.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! PUNNNNTOOOOOOOONONOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOO
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 8:10 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
The library smells like a mixture of Subway and barbecue chips
Most likely emanating from the same source.
Confusion breeds success. If they don't know each other, opponents can't have strategy. GENIUS.
by Ozzie Montana on Apr 6, 2009 8:19 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
tough shift today, huh, oz.
your mom and dad should have opened a dunkin donuts instead.
by larry on Apr 6, 2009 8:22 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
heh heh
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 8:29 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Griff just homered! LAUNCHED it outta right field.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 8:29 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
what a dick
took him, what, 2 months to hit one for us?
by Trooper on Apr 6, 2009 8:30 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
That's the most exciting thing that's happened in Seattle sports in....4 years, no?
Confusion breeds success. If they don't know each other, opponents can't have strategy. GENIUS.
by Ozzie Montana on Apr 6, 2009 8:31 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
At least. Oh wait....the Sounders....oh man, is that huge here.
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 9:52 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Where's the love? This thread is begging for unicorns and nobody's thrown this up yet. Get into your mid-season forms, people! Chin up, cip! Tomorrow's Opening Day!
...and then some depressed fucked-cake eating.
by homesickalien on Apr 6, 2009 10:29 PM CDT reply actions 2 recs
Highly recommended
Alexander Hamilton shot Alexander Hamilton...
by Hazymania on Apr 7, 2009 10:20 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
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