FanPost

I Like the White Sox: The Stupidity of April

The White Sox are in a slump right now, and if you are like me, you're not too concerned.  After all, it's just the first 15 games of the year.  And honestly other than 2005, can you remember the last good April the Sox have had?  So I decided to list some positives and things that the Sox can do to help the situation.

1-Yes get Bobby Thigpen.  In fact, you should build a statue of him.  We should get Bobby Thigpen bobble heads, and make May 37th Bobby Thigpen day at the cell.  In fact, Matty Bobby Thigpen called.  He wants his number back.  Guy goes in for one inning of work and still finds a way to give up a run.  WTF!  Anyway, Bobby could retire the number.  I don't know how long it has been since he played, but hey what the hell?  If not Santos, why not Thigpen?  I don't know who else I have faith in these days.

2-Put Ramon Castro's mug shot from ESPN on the little advertisement board behind home plate.  That will scare the opposing pictures. Only flash it on there when they get ready to wind up.  They won't know what to do rather to laugh, cry or run.

3-Get Juan Pierre a goat costume.  Since he is the problem with this team if you listen to as much Sox Post on the Score as I do.  Seriously, Juan Pierre will get it on track.  He wasn't too great in April last year either with the defense.  I trust Juan, and so should you.

4-I think Jake Peavy has gone to the shit, and he ain't coming back.  He is hanging with Colonel Wirtz somewhere in Alabama by now.  But, hey, let's take solace in the fact he isn't being Jake the bulldog anymore right gang?  I think its safe to take number 44 away from him now because Jim might be right on that one.

5-You know how the players get the shaving cream pies when they hit the walk off HR or single or do something great that deserves shaving cream pie.  I think it should become policy that every time someone in the bullpen gives up a run, they should get a different kind of pie to the face.  Perhaps a chocolate fecal pie may do wonders.  Think about it.  It might take one time to kill the epidemic.  Although the bullpen hasn't had the chance to blow any games lately.  Since that albatross last Wednesday, we haven't had a save opportunity. 

6-Dave Price struck out nine last night.  The good news, no one in Tampa got free pizza.  The bad news, Jim and WU were in Tampa at the game last night.

7-And finally, I think they need to bring a live chicken in the dugout, and Cerrano as well.


Yes I know.  Pretty ridiculous.  But anyone who knows me knows I don't do normal or stats.  Just stuff you think about after spending the night in the loser's circle.  You know, a bunch of hippies sitting in a circle playing the bongos.  Or smoking the bongos.  Whatever is your thing.

Keep your heads up playas, lots of baseball left for the season.  Lots of headshaking to do.  And lots of fireworks to blow off at the Cell still.

M

PS That last line was from those Lite beer commercials on the radio.  Those things crack me up!!!!

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