Rough season for Hawk talk
It hasn't been a good year for Hawk Harrelson phrases. It started with the venerable, harmless "can of corn," which has been under assault since Juan Pierre's first few rough weeks in the field. His play forced Hawk to provide himself an out -- "should be a..." -- on lazy flies hit to left field, which saddens me more than it should.
The becorned can isn't alone, because two others have also suffered under the weight of this most unusual of seasons.
No. 1: "Your offense is only as good as your bullpen."
This one is good for plenty of jokes on a game-to-game basis, but I know what Harrelson is trying to say. When a relief corps leaks oil, it keeps moving the goalposts farther and farther back. A bad bullpen can make even great offenses insufficient -- but that's too wordy, which makes it sound less black-and-white. Harrelson does like his absolutes.
But with the 2011 White Sox, it doesn't even apply in any way because the pitching staff is carrying the offense. The White Sox bullpen has the fifth-lowest ERA in the league, which is impressive when remembering how the season started.
The ERAs have been trending downward, along with the damage the White Sox bullpen has allowed in terms of triple-slash lines:
- April: .281/.347/.441
- May: .231/.328/.342
- June/July: .208/.277/.303
Compare the relievers' general effectiveness to the offense's runs per game:
- April: 3.89
- May: 4.41
- June/July: 3.69
For comparison's sake, the pre-Dick Allen 1970 White Sox, the last team to lose 100 games, scored 3.90 runs per game. Good luck getting your bullpen to coax victories out of that kind of support.
Conclusion: When Harrelson says, "Your offense is only as good as your bullpen," he's either insulting the efforts of seven fine individuals, or he's lying to us.
No. 2: "The more pitches you see, the more dangerous you become."
Harrelson has introduced this bromide recently, and this doesn't sound right to me, either. I formed a hypothesis before looking into it, thinking that the numbers would reveal the following:
No. 1: Long at-bats have lower batting averages in general (due to two strikes on the hitter), but OBPs will probably be higher (due to the increased likelihood of a walk).
No. 2: The White Sox aren't nearly as good in deep counts as the rest of the league.
So I ran Baseball-Reference.com's Play Index until smoke poured out of its figurative ears, and both are true. When running the Play Index for all plate appearances with seven or more plate appearances, the White Sox's resulting triple-slash line was well below the league average:
- White Sox: .170/.357/.293
- Rest of AL: .212/.386/.351
What I didn't realize was how hit-or-miss the entire offense was in deep counts. Breaking it down individually for all White Sox starters, and you get haves and have-nots:
| Pos | PA | |||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| C | A.J. Pierzynski | 21 | .211 | .286 | .211 | .496 |
| 1B | Paul Konerko | 30 | .318 | .500 | .591 | 1.091 |
| 2B | Gordon Beckham | 19 | .176 | .263 | .365 | .498 |
| SS | Alexei Ramirez | 25 | .235 | .480 | .353 | .833 |
| 3B | Brent Morel | 10 | .100 | .100 | .100 | .200 |
| LF | Juan Pierre | 18 | .333 | .444 | .333 | .778 |
| CF | Alexis Rios | 15 | .111 | .467 | .111 | .578 |
| RF | Carlos Quentin | 32 | .050 | .375 | .200 | .575 |
| DH | Adam Dunn | 41 | .161 | .366 | .516 | .882 |
Now, when seeing Paul Konerko dominating his teammates in this category, I thought, "Of course! You'd see more fastballs with full counts!" But that doesn't explain the whole thing, because the second-best fastball hitter on the 2011 White Sox is the guy batting .050*. Meanwhile, Alexei Ramirez is the worst hitter in the league against fastballs, and he's quite respectable in this case, and the similarly struggling Juan Pierre has the highest batting average of anybody. So ... forget that theory.
(*Thanks to BuehrleMan's dogged documenting, Quentin's abysmal performance in long at-bats should catch few by surprise.)
Conclusion: I'm guessing Harrelson believes this due to some kind of memory bias. When a batter sees eight pitches and grounds out to short, that's just another at-bat. When a batter fouls off four straight pitches before smoking a double to the gap, that's incredibly joyful or painful, depending on who's hitting.
Based on how few Sox become "dangerous" after making the pitcher work -- especially in terms of slugging percentage -- I think we can write this one off. If it accomplishes anything, it just makes you jealous of the Red Sox (who hit .283/.452/.490 after seeing seven pitches or more).
Speaking of which, I tried looking up how well Yaz did under the circumstances, but the pitch-by-pitch data wasn't available during the Triple Crown season. I think we can safely assume that he's the best-ever at it.
204 comments
|
4 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
from my expansive baseball playing history
i always loved the first pitch. Its a fastball more times than not, and its usually a strike as the pitcher is going to try and get ahead of you. the more you stood up there the better the chance you were going to see breaking pitches. Unless it was hung like tommy lee, i wasn’t hitting a breaking pitch.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
3-0 fastball...
I don’t understand why so many batters take all the time on 3-0. I understand you don’t want to help the pitcher out and doing what is best for the team, but I nothing pisses me off more than seeing a major league hitter watch an 85 mph fastball straight down the pipe. It is probably more complicated than I realize, but seriously, it bothers me as much as watching Dunn take that third strike right down the middle.
GET TO THE CHOPPA!!!
by hoosier3 on Jul 14, 2011 7:48 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
I agree. as a coach i would always green light my top hitters on 3-0.
i assume most of the problems stem from some ball busting high school/college coach that would make them do 100 pushups if they popped up on the 3-0 or something.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
Depends on the goal.
If it’s leading off an inning, sure, take the pitch. If it’s with 2 outs and no one on, swing away.
and the hitter, pitcher, score, etc.
what burns me with the Sox is it really depends on what is the best possible pitch to hit in the AB. If you’re a high strikeout guy (ahem…Dunn) and the pitcher you’re facing has great offspeed stuff, then you damned well better be looking FB 1st pitch or when ahead in the count.
On the 3-0 count with my HS players, again, it depends. Most HS pitchers will come with a FB when behind in counts. With that in mind 3-1 should bring another hittable FB. If behind in count, I tell hitters to make contact if the pitch is close with 2 strikes. Keep battling and maybe you see a hittable pitch. It doesn’t always work but I believe it makes a better PA given each experience.
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, 1/2 pack of cigarettes...it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
Aside from sliders, iirc, Dunn swings through
fastballs about as often as he does other offspeed stuff.
So fast he could hit a ball up the middle and it would hit him in the ass sliding into second.
by colintj on Jul 14, 2011 11:07 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
that's true. can he hit anything?
Seriously, is there a pitch he’s making regula contact with? very confounding indeed
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, 1/2 pack of cigarettes...it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
he's always done that.
that’s just who he his. it’s an approach that’s regularly made him ~30 runs/150 games better than an average hitter.
So fast he could hit a ball up the middle and it would hit him in the ass sliding into second.
I'm speaking in terms of this season
I know he’s a high SO guy for career but he looks clueless to all pitches in the AB I’ve watched this year.
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, 1/2 pack of cigarettes...it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
he's swinging and missing at the same rate as ever
his BABIP is a full 60 points below his career avg.
it’s worth mentioning that he’s chasing on more pitches than his career average. and he’s getting more first pitch strikes than ever. but i really don’t think that matters more than his balls put in play.
So fast he could hit a ball up the middle and it would hit him in the ass sliding into second.
Depends on a lot of stuff.
Especially the score, and the hitter. If Juan Pierre or Morel is up there, if they hit the ball they’re not getting more than a base. You might as well take the pitch. Plus, 3-1 isn’t exactly a bad count. It only infuriates me when someone like Konerko or Quentin takes it.
by ScottyPods Ver2.0 on Jul 14, 2011 8:53 AM CDT up reply actions
I can't speak to the exact math
But the idea is a good one: don’t make an out when you don’t have to. The rough outline is: any pitch that isn’t a really good chance for a double or better and definitely a single should get a take. That goes until 3-2 where you take unless it’s definitely a strike.
So fast he could hit a ball up the middle and it would hit him in the ass sliding into second.
by colintj on Jul 14, 2011 10:59 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
I like when Alexei does the fake bunt attempt on 3-0. I used to do that when I was 7 years old
"Fundamentals are a crutch for the talentless" Kenny Powers
You can't walk off Blue Island.
"I have no patience for the homeless. Get your old, stinky ass out!" - Terry Boers
This!
if a reason for the routine 3-0 take is don’t-help-the-pitcher-out, wouldn’t more green lights result in more walks overall?
by tommyjoepeters on Jul 14, 2011 11:44 AM CDT up reply actions
I love these pieces.
Thanks, Jim. I liked to take a pitch, ala Wade Boggs (though not as anal as Wade about it). If you see more of what the pitcher can throw, you can read him better, I would guess is the reason he says it. It’s why theoretically you might hit a pitcher the 3rd time through the lineup (though that may be as a result of fatigue). I’m sure Tom Tango or someone has done work on this.
wade boggs huh?
stop it. he was in his daddy’s nut sack when you were in your prime.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
I'm not saying he was my hero.
He’s the first example I thought of as someone who without fail took the first pitch.
i always took the first pitch too, wu.
i hit lead off most of the time, so that was part of it.
Andy Sisco has spent the last four years in a hospital bed with liquid fire shooting through his veins and small-town malcontent Jim Margalus has nothing to offer him but scorn. ~ big_fun
usually i would take the first strike
not just pitch
Andy Sisco has spent the last four years in a hospital bed with liquid fire shooting through his veins and small-town malcontent Jim Margalus has nothing to offer him but scorn. ~ big_fun
I used this line on a coworker the other day.
It remains one of my favorite stories shared on SSS. Thought you ought to know.
"I have no patience for the homeless. Get your old, stinky ass out!" - Terry Boers
I'm just gonna assume you don't get CSN out there.
by ScottyPods Ver2.0 on Jul 14, 2011 8:51 AM CDT up reply actions
In the religion of Hawkerooism, Yaz is a powerful god of old. During his reign, all was far and just
Hawk fondly remembers this time to escape from the dark reality of our present age which is ruled over by charlatons such as the western demon Bean and his minions who lurk in underground lairs beneath their mothers’ homes.
Ha!!
I assume hoodlight is a very young person. I recommend trying searching for greatest redsox players of all times or Triple Crown winners…
If you chase two rabbits both will escape!
by JofpGallagher on Jul 14, 2011 11:07 AM CDT up reply actions
He lives across the pond and probably doesn't know the history of baseball as well as we do
Yaz is Carl Yastremski. Hall of Famer of the Red Sox. Hawk played with him and would just assume lick his nuts everyday of the week. Yaz can do no wrong in Yaz’s book.
Yaz is THE powerful God of old. There are only lesser gods.
AJ Pierzynski: You have to want to catch.
by 2ndHalfAdjustments on Jul 14, 2011 11:43 AM CDT up reply actions
80s electronic group, did the songs Situation and Don't Go.
Although I think they’re known as Yazoo in your neck of the woods.
by Yinka Double Dare on Jul 14, 2011 12:42 PM CDT up reply actions
Hawk
“Aj is still the best baserunner on this team, maybe in the league, possibly all time”
What drives me crazy about hawk besides how he picks out his favorite players and is brutally bias toward them, is that every week or so he says something along the lines of “in all my years in baseball I have never seen this….” and its usually something about the best catch ever, the worst slump, best young staffs ever in the AL, ect ect….
The over exaggerations just arent engaging in his broadcasts
Agreed
He overexaggerates and is always so definative. For example, I’ll just make something up here hawk will say “Michael Cuddyer is the best at hitting a breaking ball to right field in baseball” when really in front of that phrase he should say “if you ask me” or “in my opinion” but no. Because what hawk thinks is a fact and that just gets on my nerves
by nsam93 on Jul 14, 2011 9:16 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
I'm a bit biased towards Hawk ...
but I don’t mind the absolutes, definitives, and all time proclamations. Once somebody establishes themselves with that kind of personality, you can just dial it down yourself and know when he says “All-time Best” he means “He was good.” I know people like this at work; I have friends like this: its just the kind of personality they have.
However, for all his quirks, Hawk brings a lot to the table in entertainment value: my fiance’s nostrils hilariously flare whenever he’s talking, you get to wonder how far away from him Steve will be sitting when they turn the cameras on the both, you get to hear somebody seriously use the word “dagnubbit,” you get to watch him fall in love with phrases that he obviously thinks are very insightful.
Ever wonder how Hawk comes up with his phrases? He’s eating dinner at a fine bistro. Suddenly, he drops his fork, sending it clanging against the plate. Looking up, a sheen of brilliance is radiating from his eyes. Lips pursed, ready to explode: Don’t … stop … NOW … BOOOOOOYS!!! The restaurant erupts in applause, another winner.
by Billy Charlesbois on Jul 14, 2011 9:41 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Haha. You've got the right attitude, I think, when it comes to Hawk.
I always notice the distance between him and Stone, too. While he can be unlistenable during brutal losing stretches, I still value the guy. He’s fun for the most part.
"If you are looking for a good and quick treat, mosey on over to Hardees or KFC." -Jessy S
i love the hawk.
its going to be a sad sad day when he calls it quits and there is some random 40 year old white dude doing the play by play like every other team. hawk is a legend.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
in his own mind maybe
"Rooting for the Twins is just a roundabout way of rooting for a first-round playoff bye for the Yankees." by big_fun
nonsense.
ever listen to the other play by play guys? they are all alike, they are all boring. id take hawk over any of them in a heartbeat.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
he's starting to lose it.
if the team continues to be this bad he is going to be certifiably unlistenable.
"michael gilhaney is an example of a man that is nearly banjaxed from the principal of the atomic theory. would it astonish you to hear that he is nearly half a bicycle?" ~~ sergeant pluck
aren't we all starting to lose it?
if the team continues to be this bad they are going to be certifiably unwatchable.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
he already is. has been for the last few years.
DJ and farmer are better then he is, and they are fucking mind blowingly horrible
"I wonder if converting Peavy to a closer role would be best? Help keep him healthy and help solidify the pen a bit." - Bent Over Beckham
by BoeJouma on Jul 14, 2011 9:29 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
DJ is the most unfortunate thing that happened to broadcasting ...
we’re all victims of his nice guy who stuck around and they put him somewhere status.
by Billy Charlesbois on Jul 14, 2011 9:44 AM CDT up reply actions
DJ is so bad I tried to turn on a TV in my car to not have to listen to him.
Furious George! What happened to your beautiful face?!?
by AirTrafficAJ on Jul 14, 2011 11:01 AM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
I dunno
If I have to listen to a series due to blackout or whatever, I can only make it through the first two with Ed and DJ before I start to feel like I’m going insane. Like if I don’t listen to the other team’s broadcast for the last one I’ll wind up sitting at stoplight and hear someone ask me “You think he should run here?,” or at a meeting discussing how we’re going to fill a budget gap and blurt out “They got some wooork to do!”
Ugh.
the only thing DJ and Farmer do better than Hawk
is put me to sleep. If I’m listening on MLBatbat I always listen to the other team’s feed.
I don't mind the comedy value of Farmio and DJ.
The “work to doooo…” and any attempt at singing (or the harmonious “Four Seasons,”) are crimes against puppies and children.
"If you are looking for a good and quick treat, mosey on over to Hardees or KFC." -Jessy S
well, they're not all like that.
i think we can at least agree that vin scully is way better than everyone else. there are others who are good, too. but many are not. hawk isn’t great, but i’d rather have him than a lot of others. complaining about broadcasters is just something fans do.
by larry on Jul 14, 2011 9:15 AM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
well i agree with scully obviously.
but he’s not in the cookie cutter mold either. it will be a sad day when chris rongey is doing play by play for the white sox.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
agreed
You never know what you’ve lost until it happens. Hawk is a very unique announcer, there isn’t another like him. Once you learn to not take him totally serious than it becomes much easier.
also, even my Cubs fan friends will drop “hawkisms” into everyday speech
Im fine with Hawk
but at this point he is just kind of a joke to me. His greatest strength is everyone hates him. I LOVE that. lol. Otherwise he just says the same nonsense and blabber every game. I could honestly do a whole telecast from tape edits without him in the booth after 4-5 games worth of material tops.
"Rooting for the Twins is just a roundabout way of rooting for a first-round playoff bye for the Yankees." by big_fun
by Tdogg on Jul 14, 2011 9:26 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
I've said for a long time that a Hawk soundboard could seemlessly replace the actual Hawk.
Think about Madden football games. I haven’t played one in more than 10 years, but it would be easy to accomplish with Hawk.
Why buy the cow when the milk is kinda bitchy?
by SkanchoDanza on Jul 14, 2011 9:55 AM CDT up reply actions
I like Hawk
but he can get mind-numbingly repetitive, and his self-conferred franchise for coining nicknames produces a lot of duds.
by tommyjoepeters on Jul 14, 2011 11:56 AM CDT up reply actions
i always compare him to the crazy uncle
i love him to death. i know he’s crazy. but if you’re not a sox fan, you cannot talk about how he’s crazy
brndnprkns: I'm pretty sure the "badass" value of your life is closer to Gigli than The Dark Knight
by whitesoxmatt on Jul 14, 2011 9:09 AM CDT up reply actions
i luv it when you analyze.
"michael gilhaney is an example of a man that is nearly banjaxed from the principal of the atomic theory. would it astonish you to hear that he is nearly half a bicycle?" ~~ sergeant pluck
First rule of Hawk Is Crazy Club:
You can’t talk about Hawk Is Crazy Club. Unless you are in Hawk Is Crazy Club.
good or bad, he's ours
I usually find him hard to listen to, but I guarantee, when he’s moved on, there will be shrines built for him (and not just because the Sox do that for anybody).
I shant be misled a second time
I love bitching about Hawk,
But I really do like Hawk. He’s a solid play by play, and at least he’s interesting. After listening to the Twins announcers, I wanted to kill myself from boredom. He’s definitely interesting, even if he is brutally bias and monstrously exaggerates. I also love that all other fans hate him.
by ScottyPods Ver2.0 on Jul 14, 2011 9:31 AM CDT up reply actions
a typing error, Jim:
When running the Play Index for all plate appearances with seven or more plate appearances, the White Sox’s resulting triple-slash line was well below the league average:
I assume you meant pitches seen not plate appearances there.
Nice analysis as usual, though.
"You go up there, against a dog-ass line up AND pitcher, and you don’t do a fucking thing with it. They whip your silly, sorry, saggy ass AGAIN, and you look like fucking bottom-ass, bitch-ass chumps doing it." - 2HA
In my over 50 years in baseball....
Why I never…….
Nice to see the facts Jim. Nice piece.
"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it." - Mark Twain
The words "becorned can" just beminded my fuck.
Why buy the cow when the milk is kinda bitchy?
by SkanchoDanza on Jul 14, 2011 10:00 AM CDT reply actions 6 recs
to further detail quentin
he has seen more than four pitches in a plate appearance 120 times. that is 33.9% of his plate appearances. in those plate appearances he has 16.67% of his extra base hits. (2 homers and 5 doubles, but one of those doubles really should have been an out. on april 25th granderson butchered a fly to center and turned an out into a double. if he had caught it only 14.6% of quentin’s extra base hits would have come on the 5th pitch or after.)
"michael gilhaney is an example of a man that is nearly banjaxed from the principal of the atomic theory. would it astonish you to hear that he is nearly half a bicycle?" ~~ sergeant pluck
if you replaced hawk I would be ok with it
otherwise hes fine in the booth
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
I have my issues with Hawk
but generally speaking, I’m fine with his homerisms. Recently Fox had the Sox on & frankly it was boring as hell to me. I like the home announcer feel. I love it when Hawk & Stone talk baseball strategies even when I might not agree with them.
I may be in the minority, but I like Farmer. I like the way he adds color to radio broadcasts. I listen to games on the radio more times than not (Honestly, it’s because I don’t get as pissed when watching). DJ is just weird.
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, 1/2 pack of cigarettes...it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
comparing anybody to carver, they will be gods at announcing.
"The words "becorned can" just beminded my fuck." - SkanchoDanza
agree on Carver, not a fan. He's too pompous for me.
I don’t recall who it was announcing the game, but it wasn’t Carver.
I had to look this up & it was Dick Stockton.
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, 1/2 pack of cigarettes...it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
not good enough for the mc
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, 1/2 pack of cigarettes...it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
I thought wild-thang williams was actually pretty good
by tommyjoepeters on Jul 14, 2011 12:01 PM CDT up reply actions
In 2005 I would have paid major league baseball 100 dollars (probably more)
to listen to hawk call it instead of berman and buck for the playoffs. and i’m not joking.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
we're all with you.
hawk still blows donkey balls. for free.
"The words "becorned can" just beminded my fuck." - SkanchoDanza
I never had a problem with Farmer as a color guy, but play by play is not his calling.
And when DJ switches to pbp, it’s garbage.
Reporter: I was wondering if at any point in my lifetime the Cubs weren't going to be run by a guy who didn't immediately remind me of failure, confusion, or imminent death
mistrial for the Rocket
Andy Sisco has spent the last four years in a hospital bed with liquid fire shooting through his veins and small-town malcontent Jim Margalus has nothing to offer him but scorn. ~ big_fun
Fixed
Roughseasonnew millenium for Hawktalk
My serenity is inversely proportional to my expectations.
LET’S GO YOU WHITE SOX!!!!!
would love to see the triple slashes or wOBAs or something
to compare the results of PAs that reached a 3-0 count and the pitch was taken vs put into play.
too bad I haven’t given BRef any money
Here is a new reason to want Viciedo up. In case the first thousand aren't enough
by nsam93 on Jul 14, 2011 12:44 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
makes me sad that he is not up yet
"We saw death and I don't think we fear it anymore. Not unlike 2005, when we finally clinched and then we took off in the playoffs." Coop 7/29/10
I am a lifetime Sox fan
and I have hated Harrelson form Day 1, along with his partner in suckage at that time, Don Drysdale.
That hillbilly schtick does not work in Chicago and saying that he is preferable to the corporate suits does not make it, because they are not the only choice. He is an embarrassment and I would like to ask any of his fans if they would like him if he was putting on the same hick act for the Twins or Cubs. No fucking way.
by bangkokhoosier on Jul 14, 2011 12:51 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Seems to have worked just fine in Chicago.
Hillbillies live in Chicago, too.
by winningugly on Jul 14, 2011 12:54 PM CDT up reply actions
He is still a semi-literate clown despite his longevity.
And fuck hillbillies.
by bangkokhoosier on Jul 14, 2011 12:56 PM CDT up reply actions
"I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine."
"That might be how you roll at Camp Anawanna, Budnick. But where I come from, we only salute Old Glory." -moroots on May 23rd
by South Side Expat on Jul 14, 2011 9:41 PM CDT up reply actions
That's your opinion.
Take a poll of Sox fans re. Harrelson. Very surprised if more than 30 – 40 % +.
My serenity is inversely proportional to my expectations.
LET’S GO YOU WHITE SOX!!!!!
Wrong, IMHO.
Reinsdorf values “family” to extreme as we all know.
My serenity is inversely proportional to my expectations.
LET’S GO YOU WHITE SOX!!!!!
Your hate has blinded you. YHO is wrong, IMHO
Millions of deluded tinley parkites, bridgeportians, and Poseners would flock to his memorial service. He is more loved than hated.
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 14, 2011 3:13 PM CDT up reply actions
Jim,
we need an SSS vote.
My serenity is inversely proportional to my expectations.
LET’S GO YOU WHITE SOX!!!!!
I feel JerryOwens about Hawk.
He’s omnipresent and insignificant, all at once.
Why buy the cow when the milk is kinda bitchy?
by SkanchoDanza on Jul 14, 2011 3:50 PM CDT up reply actions
well isn't that kind of the job of a home announcer?
harry carey was loved on the south side. then sox fans decided to hate him when he was the babbling buffoon doing the cubs call. absolutely the same would happen for hawk. and i’m sure a lot of sox fans would have circle me burt signs if blyleven replaced stone.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
Seriously, has anyone here ever watched a Bulls game?
Johnny Red Kerr was Hawk without the accent and more pro success. Stacey King is more of a mascot than Benny the Bull.
by Ozzie Montana on Jul 14, 2011 2:02 PM CDT up reply actions
And it's a problem
The depth of Funk’s analysis is saying ‘wild shot’ when an opposing player doesn’t make it, hating on foreign players (“Yi didn’t even look at the hoop there”), or just straight up saying strictly negative things about the other team. King, possibly, is worse. He’s more of hype-man than Flava Flav. “Hot Sauce”??? People use tired catch phrases when they aren’t quick enough to announce. Tell us why Korver was so open (downscreens, etc.) not scream ‘too fast, too good’ overdone nonsense.
LeBron James: Which of His Blessings would you deny?
by ProfessorEmmer on Jul 14, 2011 4:06 PM CDT up reply actions
i love stacey king
of course i was always a big fan of the flava too.
Andy Sisco has spent the last four years in a hospital bed with liquid fire shooting through his veins and small-town malcontent Jim Margalus has nothing to offer him but scorn. ~ big_fun
funk is the worst announcer in chicago.
len kasper has more to offer.
by obnoxious american on Jul 14, 2011 9:15 PM CDT up reply actions
Len and Bob are actually a pretty decent tandem, IMO.
I’m surprised Brenly hasn’t gotten another chance to manage a team.
AJ Pierzynski: You have to want to catch.
by 2ndHalfAdjustments on Jul 15, 2011 7:58 AM CDT up reply actions
My piece on the end of the Harry-era...and how Hawk came to town:
http://www.southsidesox.com/2011/1/7/1921484/hey-harry-goodbye
What?! I ain't no Professor Pickles!
What the viewing audience resonates with is his 'genuine-ness' for lack of a better word.
I like hawk- he is candid, true to his warped sense of self-aggrandizement, entertaining, loves the game and the sox, and makes bad games better, and great games memorable. He is Foghorn Leghorn in living flesh.
Whadday’all think of the Hawk on Facebook? Seems a bit over-the-top to me… but I loved his road trip to Dollywood with Stone, Jackson and Farmer.
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 14, 2011 1:04 PM CDT reply actions
I have no problem with Hawk
He has entertainment value and is more interesting than any drone they may replace him with.
I do have a problem with this horseshit-thus-far season, however.
We’re All In…indeed!
"Yeah, it would be nice to get it going a little before the All-Star break." - Adam Dunn on his less-than-stellar year thus far (7/7/11)
Hawk on facebook is officially the funniest thing I have ever seen on facebook
I demand the SSSer who created it reveal himself so I can congratulate him
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
It is hysterical.
I love that Chet Coppock talks as if it’s really Hawk.
by winningugly on Jul 14, 2011 1:31 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Why does this fail to surprise me? Chet has been oblivious for decades.
But I did love him on George Michaels Sports Machine…. oh- wait. that was George Michaels.
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 14, 2011 1:33 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
even money on Rhub
So fast he could hit a ball up the middle and it would hit him in the ass sliding into second.
It is obviosuly someone who loves his work
not someone like me, who doesn’t. If I were running that page I would be putting him through hell. “I was golfing with Karko at Pebble Beach and I accidentally teed up my nutsack instead of the ball, since my balls drag on the floor. Damn those boxers.”
So kind of like @nothawk.
When Mauer’s knees gave out:
This wouldn’t have happened if Mauer could go 5 minutes without a mound visit.
The Great Ballparks Tour 2011! Rogers Centre August 29, Yankee Stadium September 2, Citizens Bank Park September 5, Nationals Park September 6!
by mikecws91 on Jul 14, 2011 2:33 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
thats pretty good
Andy Sisco has spent the last four years in a hospital bed with liquid fire shooting through his veins and small-town malcontent Jim Margalus has nothing to offer him but scorn. ~ big_fun
he comes up with gems daily
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
hmm
in that case i think it’s someone you know
So fast he could hit a ball up the middle and it would hit him in the ass sliding into second.
I'm pretty sure I know who it is just based on who hawk was friends with when I got him.
I’ll never tell.
"That might be how you roll at Camp Anawanna, Budnick. But where I come from, we only salute Old Glory." -moroots on May 23rd
by South Side Expat on Jul 14, 2011 9:43 PM CDT up reply actions
hawks profile
Andy Sisco has spent the last four years in a hospital bed with liquid fire shooting through his veins and small-town malcontent Jim Margalus has nothing to offer him but scorn. ~ big_fun
I don't like Hawk but I don't like most of the MLB announcers. So might as well have the shitty guy who sounds different than the shitty guys who all sound alike.
God forbid we ever got someone like Len Kaspar, what an utter bore that man is.
Thom Brennaman is absolute horseshit.
Tampa games are horrific with him. Marty, his Dad, was good. Just like Joe Buck sucks and his Dad was great. Just like Skip Caray was OK and Chip is horseshit. Wonder if Vin Scully has a son, and if he also sucks as a broadcaster.
by winningugly on Jul 14, 2011 2:06 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
wow i dont know about the last one.
i think chip is better than skip. skip is one of the most boring announcers i have ever heard. its clear the carey’s fell off after harry.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
Take a poll.
The most misinformed announcer in all of recorded history is Chip Caray.
And, yes, there was a rather cliff-like fall-off after Harry.
"The most misinformed announcer in all of recorded history is Chip Caray."
Someone begs to differ.

"I have no patience for the homeless. Get your old, stinky ass out!" - Terry Boers
At least he had good years.
Whales! Squids! Sharks! They're everywhere! Hello, I am Poseidon! Now, when people told me I was crazy that thinly sliced roast beef would be a delicious fast-food option, I knew it was the greatest idea, and you can thank me later for Arby's.
by Jim Margalus on Jul 14, 2011 2:36 PM CDT up reply actions
They're becoming difficult to remember.
"I have no patience for the homeless. Get your old, stinky ass out!" - Terry Boers
Your face is becoming difficult to remember.
by winningugly on Jul 14, 2011 2:57 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
What isn't for you, OPOS?
"I have no patience for the homeless. Get your old, stinky ass out!" - Terry Boers
by RWShow on Jul 14, 2011 5:35 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
GD, I thought I was being attacked by a zombie!!!
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, 1/2 pack of cigarettes...it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
by lastof12 on Jul 14, 2011 2:37 PM CDT up reply actions 6 recs
I despise Thom Brennaman.
"I have no patience for the homeless. Get your old, stinky ass out!" - Terry Boers
When's the Famer expose'?
My serenity is inversely proportional to my expectations.
LET’S GO YOU WHITE SOX!!!!!
more jaw-dropping incompetence, this time more directly related to baseball
Francisco Rodriguez’s recent change of agents helped hasten his trade to the Milwaukee Brewers, a critical deal that at least marginally enhances the Mets’ ability to re-sign Jose Reyes.
Rodriguez hired Scott Boras to represent him this month, which for the Mets was a signal to trade Rodriguez as soon as possible before any constraints arose. Once the deal was made late Tuesday night, the Mets could more realistically think about re-signing Reyes, who can be a free agent after the season.
The contract Rodriguez signed with the Mets before the 2009 season includes a limited no-trade clause, meaning he could list 10 teams to which he could veto a deal. But according to two baseball officials with direct knowledge of the situation, Rodriguez’s previous agent, Paul Kinzer, never submitted the list of 10 teams.
The Mets thought that once Boras assumed representation, he would scrutinize Rodriguez’s contract and either try to submit a list or perhaps file a grievance that might allow him to do so.
major league baseball team in playoff hunt calls up prospect who is raking in the minors to replace shitty production of veterans.
shoulda been up long ago.
they probably read my post and realized “shit we do have him”.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
finally
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
There are a lot of terrible announcers in this world, but Hawk drives me nuts more than most.
I don’t like too much homerism in my announcing, but that’s to be expected to some degree. I hate it when my announcer talks to the ball, telling it to “GET DOWN” or “STRETCH” or “STAY IN THE AIR” or “GET FOUL”. I hate his “Dadgummit” and his “You gotta be bleeping me!” and his angry silence and his umpire conspiracies and his cool-story-bro stories from 50 years ago. I hate his exaggerations of players’ skills, and I hate his exaggeration of White Sox prospects that ultimately fail every time. I hate his bending over for the Twins and his “future first-ballot Hall-of-Famer” and his “former 20-game winner”. I hate that he ruined one of the greatest moments in White Sox history because his call was, “YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! HISTORY!” I hate that when I’m angry and frustrated with the White Sox, I have to be angry and frustrated with him too, because when things go wrong, he gets angering and frustrating.
The Great Ballparks Tour 2011! Rogers Centre August 29, Yankee Stadium September 2, Citizens Bank Park September 5, Nationals Park September 6!
by mikecws91 on Jul 14, 2011 2:48 PM CDT reply actions 7 recs
I didn't mind the call to be honest.
by Grinder in Training on Jul 14, 2011 2:54 PM CDT up reply actions
I'm with you.
Reporter: I was wondering if at any point in my lifetime the Cubs weren't going to be run by a guy who didn't immediately remind me of failure, confusion, or imminent death
yeah he did fine that game
he and stoney pretty much shut up near the end until it was over and let the game do the work
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
like it or not, all those things make Hawk the Hawk
Do you want Ed Farmer and DJ to replace them? I am already far more tired of “We got some work to doooooooooo” than anything Hawk says.
DJ might be the only thing worse.
Therefore, I’ve begun to mute my TV and call the damn game myself.
The Great Ballparks Tour 2011! Rogers Centre August 29, Yankee Stadium September 2, Citizens Bank Park September 5, Nationals Park September 6!
by mikecws91 on Jul 14, 2011 6:27 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
just read bm on the gamethreads
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
ESPN Sweet Spot preview
Chicago White Sox (44-48, -17)
What needs to be fixed or accomplished in the second half?
The Sox have suffered from incredibly disappointing offensive showings by Gordon Beckham, Brent Morel, Juan Pierre, Alex Rios and Adam Dunn, none of whom have an OPS+ over 82. They need to find their bats, and fast, or get out of the way because, despite being four games under .500, the Sox are still just five games back in the terrible AL Central.
Top item on shopping list?
It sounds like the Sox are getting ready to move Edwin Jackson, if they can find a taker. And why not? He’s frustratingly inconsistent, and the team has five other pitchers who can start. It’s unclear, however, whether there’s any interest around the game for Jackson, who is making more than $8 million. He’s not likely to bring back the kind of outfield help that this club needs, and the club doesn’t have the elite prospects to land an impact bat, either. The best they can probably do is to improve around the margins, by picking up a player like Coco Crisp from the A’s.
Player to watch.
Cuban import Dayan Viciedo, 22, is killing the ball at Charlotte (.325/.374/.535 with 16 homers). He could be a big help if he takes over for Pierre in left field, or the Sox could take a defensive hit by playing him at third over the atrocious Morel. But Ozzie is on record saying he does not want to move any of his veterans to accommodate the youngster.
— The Common Man, The Platoon Advantage
"Rooting for the Twins is just a roundabout way of rooting for a first-round playoff bye for the Yankees." by big_fun
jackson and rios for crisp
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
Aww geeze we aren't gonna get anyone good are we
Two Braves scouts watched the Sox in Minnesota on June 15-16 and in Colorado on June 29-30, and Phillies representatives have watched the Sox throughout this season, including last week against the Royals.
by mechanical turk on Jul 14, 2011 3:34 PM CDT reply actions
brandon allen promoted
fuck you tony pena
"The words "becorned can" just beminded my fuck." - SkanchoDanza
Youdaman.
And read the Fangraphs piece – most of the posters in the PCL area say he’s overrated, just like all hitters in the AZ air are overrated (BA, anyone?).
I'll take an overrated minor league 1B over Tony Pena.
by Grinder in Training on Jul 14, 2011 4:07 PM CDT up reply actions
I'd take a half eaten deep dish pizza over Tony Pena.
"You go up there, against a dog-ass line up AND pitcher, and you don’t do a fucking thing with it. They whip your silly, sorry, saggy ass AGAIN, and you look like fucking bottom-ass, bitch-ass chumps doing it." - 2HA
by Shoeless In SC on Jul 14, 2011 7:49 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
mmmmmm... Pizza!
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 14, 2011 8:39 PM CDT up reply actions
that was dropped on the sidewalk.
that’s how little I want Tony Pena.
"You go up there, against a dog-ass line up AND pitcher, and you don’t do a fucking thing with it. They whip your silly, sorry, saggy ass AGAIN, and you look like fucking bottom-ass, bitch-ass chumps doing it." - 2HA
by Shoeless In SC on Jul 14, 2011 9:13 PM CDT up reply actions
I hate that all prospects from the PCL are overrated. So if you are a PCL player you will be a legitimate major leaguer if you are hitting .430/.600/1.100?
the PCL is underrated.
not the first time through it though
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
twas what i read prior to comment.
as for being the man, i strive to be da best
"The words "becorned can" just beminded my fuck." - SkanchoDanza
i felt that hawk's 'more pitches you see' thang
was also the idea that you’ll be able to hit the pitchers better in the later at-bats having already seen their full repertoire.
by craigws on Jul 14, 2011 5:19 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
yeah, my thoughts were not that he says that for the at bat
but for later in the game, or as more pitches are throw the fatigue sets in. who knows. i still hate hawk
"The words "becorned can" just beminded my fuck." - SkanchoDanza
why are we so bad at everything?
glaring problems all the time
Czheck Productions
Beatsforyounow.com music community
I've never done anything good for the world, and I'm not about to start now-DF
mlb channel game is yankees-jays
jeter just did the jump throw, bautista was safe by 5 steps. woo!
boxcars boxcars boxcars
gold glove worthy
doesn’t matter if he makes outs, just needs to look good
where the white women at?
by parkernutws05 on Jul 14, 2011 10:48 PM CDT up reply actions
that second phrase is quite awkward
because when a pitch count is high:
1. the pitcher has one pitch he’s sticking to(thats obviously working) and plays around in the strike zone to get the guy out otherwise he’s:
2. struggling with his command and is tossing meatballs more than a few occassions which in that case you should be lighting him up without deep pitch counts or keep plate discipline and take the BB’s which you wouldnt be able to do if:
3. the pticher has an array of pitches and is confusing the hitters every inning and they are fending off K’s every at bat.
if he’s walking you and has no command it doesnt matter. if he’s striking you out and you cant guess his pitches by the 6th inning then it doesnt matter.
it only matters if you go up there first-pitch swinging and have 1 or 2 pitch outs. I know hawk is trying to say work the count and work his arm but if you cant guess his money pitch at the right time and get on base it really doesnt matter
for me if i saw too many pitches then i get nervous because then its like i have to try and look for a pattern in my next at bat for the NEXT at bat after that. and if i just fouled everything off its not like i did a good job reading his pitches because i am just hoping it stays in the zone for me to make contact
The realist keepin it real amongst the surrealists
R.I.P. Big Homey Nate Dogg: "Cuz Iiiiiiiiii have ne-evv-ver met a giiiiiiiiiirrrrrrllllllllllllllllllll tha-at I loved in the whole wide wooorrrlllllddddddd"
by starbury_to_s-jaxci2000 on Jul 14, 2011 7:50 PM CDT reply actions
Hey, welcome. That sounds about right. We can just shelve it as just another Hawkism.
With no snark, what makes you a White Sox fan? Do you often get to watch Hawks’ broadcasts?
"If you are looking for a good and quick treat, mosey on over to Hardees or KFC." -Jessy S
I like the Hawk.
Gives you something more to talk about with your friends or family while watching the game. I also like that he’s a homer.
"You go up there, against a dog-ass line up AND pitcher, and you don’t do a fucking thing with it. They whip your silly, sorry, saggy ass AGAIN, and you look like fucking bottom-ass, bitch-ass chumps doing it." - 2HA
someone here summed it up pretty well awhile ago about hawk,
being almost like family, he’s been around as long as you can remember, and you don’t always want to hear what he has to say. in the end, you still love him, as dysfunctional as it is.
by obnoxious american on Jul 14, 2011 9:21 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
this needs to be green.
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 14, 2011 9:30 PM CDT up reply actions
x

![]()
"That might be how you roll at Camp Anawanna, Budnick. But where I come from, we only salute Old Glory." -moroots on May 23rd
by South Side Expat on Jul 14, 2011 9:48 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
pouring out a drink for the Duke.
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 14, 2011 10:55 PM CDT up reply actions
Hunter Thompson died Feb 2005.
I’m not saying he somehow got right in with the baseball Gods to make the White Sox win that year as to be able to party incorporate again using the Hawk as his medium. I’m just saying.
Nobody goes to Dollywood with Stoney without being on some serious Thompson level drugs
"That might be how you roll at Camp Anawanna, Budnick. But where I come from, we only salute Old Glory." -moroots on May 23rd
by South Side Expat on Jul 15, 2011 12:50 AM CDT up reply actions
where did he take it? Straight into the Hawk!
"That might be how you roll at Camp Anawanna, Budnick. But where I come from, we only salute Old Glory." -moroots on May 23rd
by South Side Expat on Jul 15, 2011 12:37 PM CDT up reply actions
the moments when people here entertain each other when no baseball is going on is the best part about this site
with the passion we all put into this team. we all deserve a break too.
Well you have been on fire during this ASB mon frere!
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 15, 2011 12:19 AM CDT up reply actions
I've personally enjoyed NOT having to watch the Sox "play" baseball.
AJ Pierzynski: You have to want to catch.
by 2ndHalfAdjustments on Jul 15, 2011 8:04 AM CDT up reply actions
I'm a little upset they're coming back. The break was nice.
"I have no patience for the homeless. Get your old, stinky ass out!" - Terry Boers
i think the word that should be in quotation marks
is “baseball”.
"michael gilhaney is an example of a man that is nearly banjaxed from the principal of the atomic theory. would it astonish you to hear that he is nearly half a bicycle?" ~~ sergeant pluck
Bahahaha,
Colon got LIT UP yesterday. Awesome.
by ScottyPods Ver2.0 on Jul 15, 2011 8:16 AM CDT reply actions
Upon first reading I put the accent on the wrong SYLLable
and thought you were sharing about a visit to your favorite Thai restaurant.
White Sox 2011: The season of extraneous body parts.
on a related note...
I almost hurled when I say replays of Bautista’s ankle go “STRETCH!”
White Sox 2011: The season of extraneous body parts.
lol unfortunately he's been better than most of our pitchers this year.
Kenwo4life=ratings. Just call me Mr. USA Today.
at first I thought you said Colin
and that is awesome. fbcatnnyite
Joe Buck is just White Noise to me. It’s like the game is being called by a CD of whale songs. - mechanical turk
oh- I thought you went to the proctologist... Glad it was Bartolo.
"I am an idiot Jackhammer" - WU
by DrEmilioLizardo on Jul 15, 2011 11:55 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs

by 























