By the request of ShoeIess in SC, I present for everyone's criticism, debate, education and pleasure; the abridged version of The SSS Meme Glossary. I haven't been here as long as most of you and I am probably missing or forgetting alot of humdingers so please do all of us a favor and embiggen the community with your vast knowledge of SSS history. I also realize that some people have different defintions of certain meme's so if I am offbase on any of these please grace us with your addendums. I do not claim to know all and respect that which I do not.
As the forgotten memes roll in I will edit this post so we can keep a master list with which lurkers and new posters can refer to, so as not to be completely ignorant of the goings on around here. Hopefully this makes any future transitions into the community easier and more inclusive. Shame on me for attempting such an ambitious project akin to the creation of the Oxford English Dictionary. Most of the definitions in the OED were submitted by a man who lived in an insane asylum, so there is that.
This link was posted in 2009 by Chiburb in attempt to make things more inclusive for new people and is basically an earlier iteration of this topic. There is some really good stuff in here....http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/2/27/774044/community-project-new-memb
In no particular order...
- "address please" – a pleasant and subtle way of saying I would like to come to your house and slap you with a white glove and/or kick your fucking ass.
- "disheartening" – anything that is inexplicably tedious or heartaching, i.e. White Sox baseball 2011. [editors note: per BM "that word came to prominence is due to it’s usage by lee elia in his tirade"]
- "he's on my list" or "listed" -- longtime poster Buehrleman has a list of public figures, both in and out of sports, that he finds incompetent or reprehensible. Umpires make up a large majority of this list.
- "one scout said" – if you don't have a quote or statistic for your outrageous or poignant statement you can just say 'one scout' said then add in your statement. This can also be done in jest.
- "vongrats dickering" – this means you blame autocorrect for an incorrect spelling or completely ridiculous and nonsensical comment.
- "fial" or "reply fial" -- your dumbass forgot to hit the reply button and you are so stupid that you might as well have misspelled everything you meant to reply as well. [editors note per thatshortkid, “reply fuck” is another conjugation of “reply fial”]
- "banhammer" – many a people have succumbed to this either through personal attacks or trolling. Most of these people did not heed the warnings of the impending dismissal. It is a mystery which editors and mods have it in their toolbox.
- "die mauer" – it means the wall in German but a Twain fan (suspect #1 Jessy S) called the Minneapolis PD on thatshortkid for saying it. The Twain fan told the police that there were death threats being posted on SSS. The MPD contacted thatshortkid in California and it actually made the local news in Minneapolis. This occurred in August 2010, in one of the most disheartening White Sox collapses against the Twain.
- "bobpuller" – arch-enemy of all SSSers and a twinktown troll. There are many meanings to this phrase and none of them are good.
- "ron santo" – a meme that doesn't have legs. It will never stick.
- "check the facts, craig" – in reference to a troll attempting a brutal attack on logic and craigws would not let it go or lay down and die. The troll kept typing this phrase, even though craig had all his facts straight. It is used when someone has not done any research on the subject they are arguing with someone about. It is directed towards the person who brings facts to the table, as a tongue-in-cheek way of saying the person without facts is a dumbfuck. [editors note, further clarification from colin; "check the facts, craig" is a reconstitution of “do some research, bhoov”. bhoov being a much beloved well regarded poster presumably at present in some nowhere country that lacks Internet. the coining of DSRB was almost exactly the same, context-wise]
- "why does this keep happening to me?" – uttered by buehrleman whenever a troll urinates and take over a usually harmless thread.
- "nom nom nom" – When Danks pitches well. In reference to a GIF of Danks thrusting mechanical like jaw. Looks like he could chew steel.
- "dewpoint" – who gives a shit about the temperature…whaaaats the dewpoint? Dewpoint is all that matters in weather forecasts.
- "whosh" (retired) – when something said goes completely over someone's head or when someone missed the point completely
- "whosh trap" – when someone intentionally tries to get someone whoshed by posting something with double or triple meaning that could easily be misconstrued
- "TP's mom" (retired) – an almost 'that’s what she said' meme. For example, "With Adam Dunn up there is a big gaping hole on the left side of the infield" response "Just like TP's mom
- "OPOS" – Old piece of shit. Also "Depends" said to old pieces of shit, in double meaning of adult undergarments and perhaps.
- "IT_" – 'in the ass', 'in the ear', 'in the butt' etc…
- "DSNB" – don't stop now boys
- "taintpunch" -- what you deserve if you are beng a piss-ant. also, a sickly sweet high alcohol-level concoction or a foul tasting commalgamation of liquors.
- "picture of a rally car" – when there is a rally, people post a picture of a rally car, it gets people excited. I have not seen too many rally cars this year.
- "stew goin'" // Carl Weathers – when there seems to be a rally coming on, it is like a delicious stew in its initial stages of cooking. [editors note per TP, it is in reference to Carl Weathers on Arrested Development.] who is a meme in his own right. I believe U-God said in Chiburbs post that he makes appearances when the White Sox need rallys but seems ominous that they will not get one. HSA said in the same post that Carl Weathers also does make appearances during rallys. Here is said link provided by Grinder in Training that has most of the favorite Carl Weathers clips... http://www.changeisbeautiful.net]
- "youdaman" – when you post something that was already shared, whether that be 1 second ago or two weeks ago, doesn't matter.
- "fewer" – when someone uses the word 'less' instead of the grammatically correct 'fewer'…it is posted as a reply. I have also seen it used when people give too much information, become long winded etc.
- "drunk driving" – when this subject comes up it is inevitable that Grinder in Training name comes up, despite probably quite a few people being guilty of it.
- "your face" – if some calls you an obnoxious piece of shit, you can always respond by saying 'your face is an obnoxious piece of shit' or if someone says, "This game is boring" you can say "Your face is boring".
- "peavy" – a picture was generated of Peavy in some hipster black-rimmed glasses, you can use the word hipster and peavy interchangeably.
- 'where will he play?" – this goes back to before my time but it seems it has to do with if we are talking about trading for someone like Pujols or someone ridiculous like that you ask "where would he play?". Suggesting Ozzie would never find a place for him with the roster as currently constructed. [editors note, per fullcollapse (long time lurker) http://www.southsidesox.com/2005/8/18/185752/264# is the only evidence I could find. Griffey to Sox in 05. I’m pretty sure the image is from a Buehrle balk against the Indians. Probably called by Angel Hernandez. I didn’t realize I had been lurking for so long.]
- "clearly" – when injected into a sentence, it is immediately known that you are being sarcastic.
- "tinfoil star" – I attempted to start this meme, but it was ron santo... when someone says, "I got World Series tickets" or "I was there when AJ hit the HR against the Dodgers in 2005" you say, "tinfoil star
- "noose" – refers to the post-Cheat regime of SSS consisting of beloved leader Jim Margalus and his tireless intelligence officer larry. Derived from "new-SSS" when Jim was brought in to clean things up. No boobies, no politics, easy on the cussing. Also derives from China, Russia or East Germany executing their people.
- "model-trains, hotdish, lutefisk freckle stench, vitamin D deficient skin, inferstructure" – various cutdowns directly toward Twain (Twins fans).
- "twain" -- a derogatory term for the Twins
- "podsnoir" – refers to the fact that pierre is basically podsednik but his skin color is just different [editor's note, per HSA the creator of 'podsnoir'...it's a play on his French name; because you clearly haven't fully captured my cleverness as currently defined.]
- Posting something in all caps and misspellings denotes that the poster is riffing on ignorant idiot meatballs who call into the Score or who post on SSS.
- "fangraphs exists" or "google exists" or "____ exists" – when someone asks a question that could easily be researched themselves by opening up a new tab in their browser.
- "portslut" – refers to HSA living in a port. In every port there are portsluts for the sailors.
- "AY" – Al Yellon, the perfect caricature of meathead Cub fans everywhere, also editor of our red-headed step child blog Bleed Cubbie Blue
- "meth-up" – when 3 or more SSSers meetup for beers or a game. There is one big methup per year usually in May, where people fly in from all over the country, drive from the suburbs or hop on the Redline to tailgate.
- "basements" – all people who engage in bloggery live in their parents basements, no ifs ands or buts.
- "FNS" – Fuck Nick Swisher because he is too goofy and sucked for the Sox and screwed us in two separate trades.
- "RR" – the Right Rail, where people who are not officially affiliated with writing for SSS can post their garbage.
- "FFS" -- For fuck sake
- "go green" -- When a particular comment is deemed worthy by the elite and the rabble alike; to be turned green because of 3+ rec's.
- "underrated" - when an SSSer believes with every fabric of their being that a certain comment was overlooked as genius. This is a suggestion to reassess whether the comment should 'go green' or not.
- "larry" -- some people mistake that larry spells his name with a capital 'L'...WU usually corrects them, in Buehrleman, fewer fashion...with its 'larry'. One can suspect larry does this for the same reason bell hooks does not capitalize her name.
- "Jerry Owens" -- I believe TAEG started this before my time as a throwaway option in polls that he conducted. If there is a poll on SSS that does not have 'Jerry Owens' as an option then it is deemed illegitimate. Also, jerry owens can be used instead of "I really don't fucking care"
- "SSS" -- SouthSideSox or small sample size
- "inorite" - I know right?...used on the internet as a whole but used here 26 times since November 2009
- "steak dinner boom" -- per RWShow "it was some retard Score caller who used the phrase to emphasize his point." mostly used these days by the elusive WU. [editors note, per 2HA--"It was about Jim Hendry sitting down with then Padres’ GM Kevin Towers to swing a deal for Jake Peavy in early 2009. The caller suggested that over some steak dinners, boom, a deal could get done."
- "WU's van" -- sometime well before my time it was decided that WU drives a molestor van and lures children into it with candy. Children meaning, anyone younger than WU which is pretty much everyone on earth besides Chiburb and mick, who recieved a banhammer in the dead of the 2011 winter.
- "BHB" -- big hairy balls a.k.a. Gavin Floyd [editors note, per whitesoxmatt here is the link that started this all... http://www.southsidesox.com/2008/9/17/615998/gavin-floyd-has-big-hairy]
- "16,000 sq. feet" -- according to Hawk Harrelson, Paul Knoerko's home is 16,000 sq ft. That makes Kong's house a little under half an acre. This is further evidence that everything Hawk says is over-exaggerated. I found the listing for Konerko's house and it is simply 4,272 sq. ft. or almost 4x the size of my modest suburban ranch home.
- "gamethread fruit" -- frequent poster billyok used to post pictures of fruit in gamethreads and everyone believed this to be a good omen. billyok hasn't posted pictures of fruit in quite a while. [per Shoeless, "His fruit would bring out positive things during gamethreads: http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/8/17/992881/i-feel-a-rally-comin-on#19830986]
- "shitbricks" -- the unfortunate case of the White Sox overpaying Scott linebrink led to the photoshopped picture of Linebrink blowing a game with bricks falling out of his ass.
- "SouthSideHitman or SSH" -- per Shoeless, SSH who was banned by the Cheat due to being a negative ass during the 08 playoffs and pretty much a sarcastic negative nancy his entire existence here: http://www.southsidesox.com/2008/9/25/622186/white-sox-are-tied#8999794 . Being a SSH is being a negative ass.
- "stanchar" -- eeyore, the sky is falling
- "WCIU rain delay theater" or "George Lopez" -- most gamethread enthusiasts hope for rain delays to occur when games are broadcast on WCIU, this way they are treated to the irreverent comedy of George Lopez, King of Queens, Becker etc... Thankfully this year WCIU is now broadcast in Champaign-Urbana and Rockford, so Buehrleman and 815 can watch their baseball and rain delay theater.
- "hard stares" -- from the same dustup that gave us "address, please" when WTGTD was dishing out around the bullpen bar while cruising for e-gus. now just used to describe silly ass tough posturing.
- "go back to hell" -- This is what Buehrleman says to trolls and indignant assholes alike. [editors note, per BM, "I started using this as my semi-standard reply to SSH i’ve always liked it because at the same time as telling someone to go to hell you are also indicating that you are aware that they came from hell as well.]
- "shit rooster" -- per RWShow, "Shit rooster was a joewho botch; he was attempting to complain about the White Sox’ “shit roster”. The Shit Rooster eventually fended off the cockbird (among numerous other suitors in the animal kingdom) to become the SSS mascot."
- "denarded" -- a play on Denard Span and the word retarded. Ex: If you had to run out to the liquor store during a gamethread and missed a good inning you are denarded.
- "sickenating" -- something that is presently making you feel sick to your stomach
- "butt cancer" -- it has been long rumored that the founding father of this site, The Cheat, had butt cancer at one time. I have seen people being accused of having butt cancer when they are acting like pussies too. The meme originated from this larry post... http://www.southsidesox.com/2009/3/11/794374/who-will-play-second-base
- "accidentally the whole thing" -- per Shoeless..."this is an internet meme and around here it basically means someone has done something of such epic fail, It’s something of monumental failure." Mechanical Turk cleared up that this this originated on 4chan several years prior to its arrival here.
- "stanchar effect"-- per BoeJouma, "stanchar would routinely show up out of nowhere in a given gamethread, say what he thought was about to happen, good or bad, and the exact opposite would occur. After a while the reverse stanchar effect became prominent, in which he would simply predict what would happen and it did happen."
- "self-imposed ban" -- some superstitious SSSers decide to stop posting on SSS and basically become lurkers because they think it will change the fortunes of the team. Long time poster tdogg banned himself just prior to the White Sox 25-5 run in 2010 and it is thought by many, in jest, that the winning streak would not have occurred had tdogg not deprived SSS of his presence. More recently, in 2011, pierzynskirules (pr) and 67WMAQ tried to do this and is failed miserably.
“that’s the sad thing.” or “his stats are the same as fields, that’s the sad thing.” (or “his numbers are as good as fields, that’s the sad thing.”) a double post by hitlesswonder that provided hilarity.
"(not a typo)" -- originated in this link http://www.southsidesox.com/2011/7/8/2265535/bullpen-providing-ballast-for-struggling-sox Apparently is being used as a reply to point out a poster’s typo.
- "thank you _____" -- this originated with Chiburb to the best of my knowledge. For example: colin writes a nice article he will thank U-God and vice-versa. In OPOS terms this is done to "get their goat". As BoeJouma states in the comment section, this can also be used if someone writes an overly verbose or longwinded post or article, someone can reply with "thank you HSA". This is done because HSA is notorious for her lengthy articles/fanposts and it is kind of a running joke that no one has the patience, inclination or attention span to actually read such wordiness; despite that most likely being untrue.
- "who?" or "who dis?" -- per TSK, "Who?" being the typical reply to a mention of a formerly-regular commenter who hasn't been seen around these parts in some time" "Who dis?" is a common reply to someone who has not been seen around these parts but just finally commented after quite some time.
- "official press release" -- This one hearkens back to the 2007 season, here is the link that explains it, provided by Nordhagen...http://www.southsidesox.com/2007/6/27/93610/1349. Per tdogg, "a poster named jre (jerry royster experience). I believe there was a transaction that Larry wrote about. It was questioned by him. He basically said without an official press release he didn’t believe. Thus began an inside joke on various transaction reports (mostly by ssh who reported every damn thing) on what we would believe or not. Even if the deals were actually signed because it wasn’t offically announced."
- "deadhorse beaten picture" -- larry is known to post a picture of a rotting horse corpse when someone brings up a subject that has been talked about and debated over and over again. His profile picture is also a picture of a gruesome dead horse. larry enjoys dead animals.
- "Liz" - thanks to ozziemontana for finding this link... http://www.southsidesox.com/story/2007/9/7/185521/0796. During a gamethread in 2007, a morbidly obese woman was asked her hand in marriage. SSSers took her under their meme wing if you will and the idea of her became married to SSS. The link could describe it better than I could.
- "sox machine" -- no one is quite sure what the hell this is but apparently Jim Margalus had a blog about the White Sox before he took over at SSS. Apparently the blog had a readership of around four people. Refugees from that site are known as S&Mers.
- "The Wire" -- chances are if you do not understand a comment on SSS it may be a quote or reference to the HBO's now defunct television series The Wire. While I came to SSS having already watched all five seasons, the proponents of this show are many and vocal. Many an SSSer has been converted to The Wire's gospel.
“how about a subject line there, chief?” -- when an image is posted without a subject line and BM is around he is obligated to break this out. If you don't put a subject line in your post it is impossible to hide the picture you post as well.
"TTJ" -- Thats the joke
"FFS" -- for fuck sake