Bad Day at Sox Elementary: An Annoyingly Inside SSS Crossword


It was a rough day at White Sox Elementary...

Besides the general squalor and ever-present threat posed by roving packs of murderous season ticket holders, three abject disasters befell Mr. Steverson, the bright-eyed but somewhat naive young educator charged with teaching these young men about hitting... and maybe something about life along the way! But mostly hitting.

Fill in the blanks to reveal the low-lights. It's too late to help, of course, but you would have just stood there, mouth agape, like the helpless little baby you are, anyway.

[Where reality/facts conflicted with memes, you can imagine which prevailed: If you find yourself getting hung up on such things, you're too dour.]


1. Survived by Wilbur; desecrated by larry

2. Such as Lingerie, Rug, J

3. I believe Hawk is a fan

4. Sings to signify the end of Sox losses

5. Long time since 1908…

6. What in the hell are you doing?

7. Official birds of 2013 White Sox

8. Tank Parking

9. Baseball players grow on trees here; named after baseball great Cerrano

10. Luminary, prophet, possible sock puppet

11. 2B Gloveonchair

12. MOAR ANDERSONS! - Hahn ‘13

13. HGH cautionary tale, respected thespian

14. Died, apparently; Googled by many

15. This institution was built in a town named after history’s greatest pitching coach

16. Greek God of Did Rios Get This Shit From You?

17. Correct answer to, Favorite Sox: Keppinger, Troncoso or Flowers?

18. Official sport of the RRRR

19. Lone faerie to crack a Sox roster

20. Brian McCann’s relationship to fun

21. Pods Noir

22. Pods Blanc

23. Country catalog includes songs about being fat and shitty at umpiring

24. Highlight of 2013 Sox games

25. Only guy on the Sox that gets to drink the coffee

26. nsr’s 24-down substitute

27. -dis?

28. Statistical caveat, incestuous den of loathsome depravity.

29. U.Bacon


25. Royce, or an ivy-averse trinket

26. This package is really huge, can you put it in the trunk for me?

30. A three-headed one of these terrorized the South Side recently

31. I imagine KenWo wearing these pants 24/7

32. MarketMaker, HSA and some turds do this

33. 4A catcher, source of overmany insurance discounts

34. Two things to say to you: Strike this motherfucker out, and don’t sleep with this woman

35. Buggery aid

36. "C’mon _____! C’mon _____!"

37. 2013 TWTL MVP

38. Josh Reddick does not do this

39. Less

40. Likely too busy to complete this crossword, but may cloak it later

41. Sale and a Ventura

42. FK_

43. If I produced a 70s exploitation film where Jared Mitchell (not Joey) and Jacob May went to Australia to thrash turkeys and win a baseball trophy, I’d call it "The Shield of _______."

44. Some Metrodome or pro-wrestler initials

45. U-God’s wake

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