It was a rough day at White Sox Elementary...
Besides the general squalor and ever-present threat posed by roving packs of murderous season ticket holders, three abject disasters befell Mr. Steverson, the bright-eyed but somewhat naive young educator charged with teaching these young men about hitting... and maybe something about life along the way! But mostly hitting.
Fill in the blanks to reveal the low-lights. It's too late to help, of course, but you would have just stood there, mouth agape, like the helpless little baby you are, anyway.
[Where reality/facts conflicted with memes, you can imagine which prevailed: If you find yourself getting hung up on such things, you're too dour.]
1. Survived by Wilbur; desecrated by larry
2. Such as Lingerie, Rug, J
3. I believe Hawk is a fan
4. Sings to signify the end of Sox losses
5. Long time since 1908…
6. What in the hell are you doing?
7. Official birds of 2013 White Sox
8. Tank Parking
9. Baseball players grow on trees here; named after baseball great Cerrano
10. Luminary, prophet, possible sock puppet
11. 2B Gloveonchair
12. MOAR ANDERSONS! - Hahn ‘13
13. HGH cautionary tale, respected thespian
14. Died, apparently; Googled by many
15. This institution was built in a town named after history’s greatest pitching coach
16. Greek God of Did Rios Get This Shit From You?
17. Correct answer to, Favorite Sox: Keppinger, Troncoso or Flowers?
18. Official sport of the RRRR
19. Lone faerie to crack a Sox roster
20. Brian McCann’s relationship to fun
21. Pods Noir
22. Pods Blanc
23. Country catalog includes songs about being fat and shitty at umpiring
24. Highlight of 2013 Sox games
25. Only guy on the Sox that gets to drink the coffee
26. nsr’s 24-down substitute
28. Statistical caveat, incestuous den of loathsome depravity.
25. Royce, or an ivy-averse trinket
26. This package is really huge, can you put it in the trunk for me?
30. A three-headed one of these terrorized the South Side recently
31. I imagine KenWo wearing these pants 24/7
32. MarketMaker, HSA and some turds do this
33. 4A catcher, source of overmany insurance discounts
34. Two things to say to you: Strike this motherfucker out, and don’t sleep with this woman
35. Buggery aid
36. "C’mon _____! C’mon _____!"
37. 2013 TWTL MVP
38. Josh Reddick does not do this
40. Likely too busy to complete this crossword, but may cloak it later
41. Sale and a Ventura
44. Some Metrodome or pro-wrestler initials
45. U-God’s wake