FanPost

The Longest Winter Uniform Contest

Tradition has one sane purpose and that purpose is to bring some sort of advantage to the group, culture or society sanctioning the institution. Otherwise tradition is just for tradition’s sake and it becomes trite and saccharine. Look no further than the execrable savages 9.6 miles to the north. Their adorable traditions have bestowed their star-crossed fan-base with successful failure for all or parts of three centuries.

Tradition should bring value to a culture and tradition is best if it is a tradition of adaptation that allows for breathtakingly enlightened phenomenon like exploding scoreboards , disco riots, dwarfs in the batter’s box, drunk clown’s roaming the stands with buzzing noses, ecto-cooler-vomit-hued mascots, showers on the concourse and mainly for the purposes of this article—unstable monkey suits.

The White Sox franchise has been around since the 19th century, it’s first iteration being the Sioux City Cornhuskers. Charles Comiskey purchased and moved the team to the godforsaken hellhole St. Paul, Minnesota and eventually, in 1900, to Chicago where he appropriated the Cubs previous nickname--the White Stockings.

Since 1900 the team has had 10 different uniforms and no uniform has lasted as long as the current NY Yankee bastardization. I understand Renisdorf’s modus operandi has been to bring stability to the franchise following decades as a travelling circus of merrymaking Punchinellos--but for good, bad or indifferent the organization has moved away from the Veeck days and honestly, I find it difficult and embarrassing to purchase current White Sox apparel.

The jersey’s might be the most boring jersey’s in the league and the fact they are so similar to the Yankees traditional uniforms is downright infuriating at times. The olde English font of the Sox screams false tradition and reeks of "new money". The pinstripes are offensive to modern sensibilities. The color’s silver and black were a product of the early 90’s when every middle-school kid desired a Starter jacket with gang colors. You had your choice of the Charlotte Hornets, the San Jose Sharks or the Chicago White Sox. Without NWA we may never have had these uniforms forced upon us in the first place. The road’s are brutal in their monotone cursivenashishness and make me want to tie a bolder to my ankle prior to jumping off the Chicago Skyway into the Calumet River. It's what I would wear to go sort parts in a factory. The hat is what the IRS would wear if they had a softball team. The whole package seems like it won a uniform contest where the judges were all actuaries and attorneys.

Did you say uniform creation contest!? Thats a hell of an idea. In the spirit of what Renisdorf did back in 1981, I propose a fan driven uniform contest here at SSS using MS Paint. Please contribute your designs. The winner gets to choose from a prize pool of 1.) Jose Abreu Shirsey, 2.) White Sox Shirsey with your SSS handle on the back and your choice of number 3.) a Montgomery Biscuit New Era Fitted Hat OR 4.) somehow having your design made into an actual shirt. I reserve the right to declare that they all suck and that no one wins but I really don’t want that to happen.

Here is my idea below, as you can see I consulted with Ralph Lauren:

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SouthSideSox is a community driven site. As such, users are able to express their thoughts and opinions in a FanPost, such as this one, which represents the views of this particular fan, but not necessarily the entire community or SouthSideSox editors.

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