FanPost

Der Twain urn Heavern:  Re-Durx


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"Heeeey, who wurnts to gur to der Twains gurme?"

"Nurt me, eh? Wurr playin' der Sux"

"Urrrr, come urn, Mays pitching turdaye eh'?"

"Can we take der traayne urtlurst?"

"You burt yur swurt burpy, we curn!"

"Well thurn, shirl wur?"

"I'll murtt yur all thur, I'm turking my motorcircle."

"Be curful! Mildreder durdy gurt decurpitaded on thurt der locomotor."

"Urm, turking mer Sergueway acrurst frozurn Lurk Minnetonker, eh?"

"Wurt urver, Albiner Al, ehyo."

"This thurng is der turps!"

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"All Abird! Thur lurst one on is on is der rutturn urg!"

"Aller, aller oxen free, eh!"

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"Wait, dis her traayne is der expresser, eh?"

"Woah, wurt kinder traayne is dis, eh?

"By der lurks of urt, it's der sexy traayne, ehyooo?! Is that Mildreder's surster, Nurncy!?"

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"Swurt, babeur, jursus, purt ders bazookers awur, Nurncy! May gurd hurve mercy on ur surls!"

"I nerd a drurnk!"

"I brought der Minnesota Slammerer, der, eh?"

"Hurr aburt surm? A little durb'll durr yur!"

"Vurking commmunurn, eh, ah, eh, eh, huh, huh?"

BANG! BANG!

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"THUR GURT FREDER! Murst burr Chicagur burs! Stur with mur, Freder! Durnt yur durr this turr mur!

"Surr cold, eh, urr, I see babur jursus"

"Gurr turr thur lurt, freder!"

"Fredererer, urr ya sure urts nurt Danner Gladden!? Nurt Jursus?

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"Jursus surrs yurl url gonna durr todurr, agh, curf, curf, blurgggggg........."

"Thurs surns of birches killed frederererer, eh?"

"Wurt durd he murn aburt, url of urse dieurn, eh?"

"Urr don't nurr, burt lurk ahurd! Thurrs somewurn on der trwacks!"

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"Urts a berm!"

"I jurst wanner surr, May purch, eh?!"

"Hurs der burst purching purspurct surnce Frunk Violurr"

"Why does thurs kurp hurppening turr murr! MUR BURT BLURLURVURN HURVE MERCY URN URR SURLS!"

"Der is Mauerer on der trwack, err, eh? Die Mauerer, ehyooo, urt urr!"

"INFERSTRUCTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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The White Sox will be playing another game in an empty stadium tonight, since the only Twain fans who bought a ticket to see May pitch against Sale took their seats next to Gurd. A tragic motorcycle/segway accident sealed the fate.

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