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Scott Schoeneweis received steroids while on the White Sox

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According to an ESPN the Magazine report, Scott Schoeneweis, who filled the hard-to-spell bullpen pitcher who thought he was a starter role after Tanyon Sturtze was let go, received six shipments of steroids while playing for the White Sox in 2003 and 2004.

Not only did he receive shipments of steriods, but this dumbass had the bright idea to send them to Comiskey Park. My exclusive* inside sources say the packages were cleverly labeled "laxatives." Seriously, what type of arrogant numbskull thought he would get away with something like this? And how the heck did he think it would play on a team which tried to boycott the initial sample testing in order to force a more full-blown steroid testing?

Schoeneweis was 8-10 with a 5.39 ERA in 40 games (138.2 IP) with the White Sox including 19 starts.

* completely fabricated