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Darin Erstad's farts smell like freshly baked cookies

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...Just ask Phil Rogers.

The fact that Erstad hasn't had a productive season since 2000 won't stop the media from praising this grinder (read: little white guy). I can only imagine the crap we're going to hear from Hawk during the first two weeks of the season before Erstad is knocked out for the year.

Other news from Arizona

  • Buehrle looks just like he did in the second half of last season. It's OK, "the ball felt good coming out of my hand." (video)
  • Not to be outdone, Garland decided to channel his pre-All-Star-Break form. Says Garland, "It's tough down here in Arizona." (video)
  • Bobby Jenks was removed from the game without retiring a batter. The White Sox are using the scary two-word phrase "shoulder tightness" with NO PAIN contractually obligated to tacked on to ease the publics fears. Jenks says he's fine. He can eat with his left arm.
  • Seriously though, it's only one game. And the most encouraging thing I heard is that Buehrle was throwing 88-89 with his fastball. We didn't see that at anytime after July last year.
  • John Danks sounded like he had a good outing, surrendering a run on what we call a Mackowiak Triple around here, though I'm unsure of who was playing the field at that point.
  • Offensively, the stars were once again Anderson (RBI 2B off the monsterous batting eye in CF) and Uribe (2-2, SB), which could have something to do with them each feeling heat to produce this season.