clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

Bobby Jenks Hates Us All And Drowns Puppies On Off-Days

I had just closed my tab at the Sodo Showbox bar and boasted to the bartender about what a lovely curveball Bobby Jenks could throw, when that very same Bobby Jenks hung two pitches belt-high over the plate, to two different Mariners; both of whom sent those pitches into left field.

Tie game in the 9th!

John Danks clearly does not know how to win a game.

In actuality, Danks pitched a gem and should have gotten the win.  Over 8 innings of work, he only gave up 4 hits and 2 walks.  A homer off the bat of Beltre was his only run, and it didn't come until the 7th inning.   His off-speed pitches were simply vicious tonight.  He threw 97 pitches; 63 of them for strikes. 

In that same time frame, the Mariners were already through 5 pitchers and the fate of the game seemed sealed.
And then came Big Bad (in the literal sense this time) Bobby for the routine close with a 2-run cushion.

Since the boxscore reveals the nasty details and I know nobody likes reading, I'll skip the abstract inning-by-inning recap and interpretive dance that I had planned. 

Rather, here are some things I took away from this game:

1. I like the cut of Kotsay's jib more and more each game.  Kotsay had 4 hits in 6 ABs tonight, with 2 RBIs.  His beard is good.  And his wife is hot.
2. I would like to take back the "Thank you for Rios" I gave to Kenny last month.  'nuf said.
3. Getz had not 1, not 2, but 4 - FOUR - walks tonight (and a SB).  And had a great play in the 10th which allowed us to cling to a shred of worthless hope that we might actually win.
4. Alexei made a brilliant play to his left on a hard-hit ball by catcher Adam Moore (his first ML at-bat) in the 3rd.  The ball hit his glove and spun that skinny Cuban right around into throwing position.  There was nothing lazy about this play.
5.  Ichiro is extremely not bad.  He recently earned his 200th hit of the season - making it 9 consecutive seasons in which he has hit 200 or more.  You can celebrate his achievements with a collectible bat, for a mere $129.95 (plus S/H).  If you care to purchase that, find the damn link yourself.  
6. Surprising as it may seem, Pena did not blow this particular game in extras.  Not surprisingly, Linebrink did.
7. If the game goes to the 14th inning in Seattle, it's probably best to just close the tab and walk home.

As a quick summary, Sox lost 4 out of 6 in Seattle this year (and probably should have lost one more of those).  Overall record-wise, we are equally mediocre.  But considering divisional opponents, it's sad to say that the Mariners were probably better than the Sox this year.  Their defense is hard to beat and they've been able to take advantage of the luck that's come their way with help from nearly everyone on their roster - from Beltre to Rob Johnson and the 50 Wilsons they got over there.      

And finally, to answer the question posed earlier today by Tdogg - what are the chances the Sox win the next 4 games?  I have been slaving all night, crunching numbers and rounding decimals and fingering my abacus....and the answer is: 0%

However the hope for the play-offs is still alive and kicking!  We can do it guys!  Never give up! 
Ah, just f*** it, dude.