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Here She Comes Now Sayin' Monet Monet

You know that Ozzie is going to find something amazing to touch, you decide to go straight for the French impressionists.  And that's when you see it.


You can feel that this will do it.  No way he beats you this time.  Unfortunately, you don't see the security guard standing behind you.  Your moment of glory is incredibly fleeting.


Prior to this very moment, you had no idea that potentially ruining priceless works of art could get you thrown in jail for the day.  Coop is on the way to bail you out.   Again.  You decide to pass the time in your cell making friends.

There is a man in his mid-20's sitting on the cot across from you.  Think Budnick, but about 15 years later.


Yup, this seems about right.

"What are you here for?"

", armed robbery.  You?"

"Touching priceless artwork."

"Wait a minute, you're Kenny Williams.  Tell you what, you bail me out and I'll sign a contract, bare minimum."

"No offense son, but you don't look like much of a ballplayer.  You're like 5'9"."

"Yeah, but I'm a drop and drive pitcher who sits around 86 mph.  I'll be like the next Shingo Takatsu!"

"Sure, why the hell not."

And so began the legend of young Colin "Budnick" Johns.  Major league hitters were completely unprepared for his 53 mph changeup.  He was unhittable for a year, becoming a crowd favorite before quickly exiting the majors.  Word has it he's currently looking for another job.  I'm sure he'll land an interview or two.