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Meet the Players: Year of the Hamster

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Tap Attack: When not concerned with gobbling concessions, YOTH’s slender fingers type approximately 160 words per minute.

Sports, health and general interest writer Year of the Hamster comes to South Side Sox after years of lurking, finally putting her enthusiasm and clever turn of phrase to productive use. She has also spent time editing various White Sox publications and books.

Turned on to the team by her husband more than 20 years ago, YOTH counts 2008’s Blackout game as one of her biggest thrills at the park. She also has what is believed to be the longest consecutive-games-posed-with-Elvis streak in Sox Park history.

If you find yourself at a ballgame near a gal wearing a groovy Chisox Seuss hat and gobbling elotes, introduce yourself and sit a spell.

Meet the Players: Quick Hits

Name: The Artist Formerly Known as DulcetTones.

Hometown: Greendale/Milwaukee

White Sox fan since: 1996

First White Sox memory: Discovering White Sox concessions.

Favorite White Sox memory: Eating concessions.

Favorite White Sox player: Jermaine “Nice Guy” Dye

Next White Sox statue: Hawk Harrelson

Next White Sox retired number: I like the dual idea of the Dye/Robin Ventura ceremony for No. 23.

Go-to concession food at Sox Park: Elotes

HALL OF FAME SPEED ROUND

HAROLD BAINES No

MARK BUEHRLE Yes

JOE JACKSON Yes. “The man’s done enough.”

PAUL KONERKO No

MINNIE MIÑOSO Yes

YOAN MONCADA No

CHRIS SALE Holy crap he’s already getting close. Yes.

South Side Sox on the field: Raspy, grizzled concessionaire who heroically catches the odd fly ball to give to a kid.

Favorite Baseball Movie: All of them, because they’re life metaphors. But A League of Their Own reminds us to savor the moment, particularly the melancholic ending at the Hall of Fame. Favorite line: “The hard is what makes it great.”

True or false: Every jumbled pile of person has a thinking part that wonders what the part that isn’t thinking isn’t thinking of. False—that assumes a lot of us are thinking at all.