Methup X, success! Chisox nip Texas, 5-3

As we await word of another successful South Side Sox Methup from those in the mix, let’s bask in the glory of a guaranteed non-loss in a series against a team other than the Kansas City Royals!

The Chicago White Sox achieved that status with a 5-3 win over the Texas Rangers in front of thousands of Star Wars nuts as well as unspecified dozens of SSS loyalists at Sox Park on Saturday night.

It was everyone’s favorite right field stumbler, clubber Daniel Palka, who provided the biggest blow, a two-out, two-RBI triple in the third.

Palka’s big bat and circuslike D makes him an easy comp as 2018’s Nicky Delmonico, but WAR-wise, Palka’s got a ways to go. Still, it’s impressive to see him fill the gaps with swats (oppo swats, even) and even draw walks with his swing-happy tendencies. With Delmonico out pretty much to the All-Star Break with a broken hand, let’s hope there’s much more poke-a in Palka’s bat.

[Ed note: On Methup night of all nights, I’m going to let the double entendre stand, as called on the field.]

Palka finished the night 1-for-3, with two RBI and a walk.

Before Palka’s poke, several Sox set the table for a crooked-number inning off of Rangers starter Ariel Jurado, making his major league debut. Omar Narváez led off with a double, and after two outs, four straight White Sox got on base: Yolmer Sánchez walked, José Abreu and Matt Davidson tapped in the first two runs with singles, then Palka.

Abreu would later smack a solo shot in the seventh, and also added a double and an intentional walk in the game, putting him on base in all four plate appearances. Postgame, Abreu conducted a broadcast interview with his jersey sporting an autograph by coach Joe McEwing, proving that worst team in baseball can get a little giddy when wins are falling its way.

White Sox starter Lucas Giolito started out in typically rough fashion, surrendering three doubles in the third inning to give Texas a 2-0 lead, and allowing another run in the third. But after the first three frames, Giolito allowed just one bunt single over the successive three innings, with one K and one HBP, to hold his lead.

Bruce Rondón took the seventh, Jace Fry (now with seven no-hit innings since being called up from Charlotte) the eighth and one out into the ninth, and Nate Jones finished the Rangers off. Tonight’s relief unit was phenomenal, allowing just one hit against five Ks.

Brace yourselves, White Sox fans more used to checking the team’s historically bad start than chalking up series wins, but Chicago can clinch its third series victory this season — and first against a team outside of K.C. — with a Reynaldo López win tomorrow.