clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Make it rain, Jerry

New, comments
Boston Red Sox v Chicago White Sox Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images

We haven’t always seen eye-to-eye, Jer. But I think we’re just about on the same page on this one. Credible report:

Let’s be really real here. Morbid, even. You’re 83 this year. You don’t have much time left. You’re a tax lawyer, so I know you’re not offended by the numbers. Life expectancy tables say you’ve got about 6.5 years left. You’re a rich white guy, so maybe it’s reasonable to take the over. NorthShore Health Care is the best, after all. But then again, what about those cigars? Let’s call it a wash.

Seven years (so retorts White Sox front office mouthpiece Bob Nightengale). Eight years. Nine years. Ten. Whatever. You’re probably gone. Sure, you’ve got quite a few fellow investors to think about. But the ones who actually went in with you back in the ’80s are either dead already or right up there in age with you. The others? The heirs? The second and third generations? Pardon my Francais, but fuck ’em. Ya’ll bought the team for $19 million. Forbes says the team is now worth $1.5 billion. And they’ve been underestimating team values given what sale prices have been recently. You’ve done your part. Hell, you came up with MLBAM. You’ve more than done your part. It’s time to enjoy.

The rebuild was a hard pill to swallow, particularly at your age. But it had to be done. You’ve got that one ring, but I know you want more. And I know Rick and Kenny told you about the 2018-19 free agent class when they were selling the rebuild. Harper. Machado. Elite talent not yet even in their prime years. The kinds of players who become available once a generation.

Now ain’t the time to get squeamish. And I’m sure the man who sold Balcor for $102 million still has the cajones. It’s (apparently) up to you and the Phillies. Close that deal. The fanbase is behind you. You got that money. It’s time to spend that money, man.