When I was a young’un, I was brought up to have firewater in my belly, to harrumph and garrumph over any transposition of the unwritten rules of base-ball.
Albert Pujols, strangely, was a guy who really got my goat (Sammy Sosa was such a friggin’ ham, his dumbass hop somehow escaped my radar). Pujols would hit mammoth homers and stand in the box and stare at them, like a robot or marble statue.
(I mean, hell was my problem? First, this is nothing compared to what we see today. Second, once he gets out of first gear, Pujols is like sprinting around the bases, not milking the moment. Third, this homer forced a sixth game, threw off Houston’s rotation, and aided the World Series sweep by the Good Guys. Jeez, what a grinch I was.)
I figured that any pitcher who didn’t put Pujols down at the earliest juncture was a sissy, or at least in violation of the Bob Gibson Addendums to the Official Rules for Hurlers and While We’re at It, Take Off the Goddam Baseball Helmet You Fancy Boy, 1968 edition.
I’ll still laugh my ass off (or lament, if it’s a White Sox player) a dude parked in the box admiring his ... long fly out ... single off the wall ... or double TOOTBLANned into a non-triple and the third out of the inning, when he guesses wrong on his clout. (Helps that is seems to happen with uncommon frequency with the northsiders.) But that’s different.
Today, if you want to Willie Mays Hayes the hell outta your plays, OK. Just have fun.
I’m not sure where exactly the change occurred for me. But, flying a little close to
territory just wasn’t where I wanted to be as a baseball fan.
Exactly. Mirrors my experience.— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
Evolve, people. It's a goddam game.
If it's gonna be absolutemente caos vs. the grandpa set, I'm siding with the caos. https://t.co/mSvbBiXXGp
In honor of Tim Anderson getting K.C.’s goat on Wednesday, even in a loss, I’d like to share how @SouthSideSox took in the aftermath.
So, it begins:
Put a name on so we can see who you talking bout bra— T A 7 (@TimAnderson7) April 18, 2019
Hey, Grandpa Grichuk, you got your paper, just simmer down. https://t.co/pEyne8xpkQ— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
I’m going to forego SSS’s tweet to this terrific comp by Jomboy in order to make both highlights available here, but our take was:
This is FABULOUSLY done:
When I make these breakdowns I pull from both broadcasts and I always love noticing the slight differences in productions and commentary.— Jomboy (@Jomboy_) April 17, 2019
Well in this one, the difference in commentary was far from slight. pic.twitter.com/3O3kunO65a
Oh, and @RGrich15's career WAR is also .017 per game, so perhaps he should pipe down and just be happy with the $52M he purloined from the Blue Jays.— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
MLB tacitly telling graybeards Huff and Grichuk to stuff it. https://t.co/VWus69QnBP— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
Love ya Reggie, but this, THIS, *this* is fucking rich. https://t.co/21fIaohhSO— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
Bat flips injure no one but opponent egos.— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
Retaliation BUT ONLY in the lower body can bust a knee, foot, toe, etc.
I like how the only option here is a "safe" HBP.
How about a pitcher having enough skill and confidence to back a guy off the plate, then K his ass?
No shit. TA didn't wet himself busting a Texas Leaguer for a 3rd straight multihit game or some stat nerd b.s. He woofed a longball way deep, against a rival, managed by a pretty grindy redass himself.— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
The HBP & "bench clearing" is way more pimpy than a spontaneous bat flip. https://t.co/zRkZ8a7tE1
Aubrey Huff, shitting himself on live Twitter.— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
Have another Tom Collins, pops. https://t.co/AvM5vcFku9
I like to give MLB and such plenty flatulence for their "tweet every Yankee homer" shenanigans. But they've drawn a line in the sand on this TA stuff, and I'm loving them for it. https://t.co/csbzRtUNaR— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
That bat flip might have made Salvy Perez bleed from his eye sockets. https://t.co/LDUFtuYK6y— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
Flashback to last September, apropos given Joe West piloting the clown car again today: https://t.co/qZpsNNMpEl— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
Holy crap, now *this* is a ballsy double-down:— South Side Sox (@SouthSideSox) April 18, 2019
("I wasn't talking about you but, y'know, as long as we're at it, ATONE!")
This is stick of butter in your latte rich, Grich. https://t.co/oARlkpJ83K