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FD/FORONE Washington Post Studio DATE: July 5, 2007 PHOTO: J

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Green Eggs and Hahn

As the Winter Meetings approach, a Seussian twist

Green eggs. More or less.
| Julia Ewan/The The Washington Post via Getty Images

I am Obi. Wan Kenobi. I am Obi-Wan.

That Obi-Wan. That Obi-Wan. I do not like that Obi-Wan.

Do you like Jer, Ken and Hahn?

I do not like them, Obi-Wan,
I do not like Jer, Ken and Hahn.

Would you like them in a dream?
Would you like them on your team?
Would you like them anywhere,
Or are they just a bad nightmare?

I would not like them in a dream
I would not like them on my team
I would not like them anywhere,
They are just a bad nightmare.
I do not like Jer, Ken and Hahn,
I do not like them, Obi-Wan.

Would you let them run the draft,
Or would that be extremely daft?
Would you sing a song most dirge-ry
If they signed pitchers with multiple surgery?

I would not let them run the draft
For that would be extremely daft,
And I have sung songs very dirge-ry
Because they’ve signed pitchers with multiple surgery.
I would not let Jer, Ken and Hahn,
Do anything, ever, Obi-Wan.

Would you let them say good-bye
To your team’s outstanding guy
Without even a decent try
Or an explanation why?
Would you let them make things worse,
Or would you utter a nasty curse?

I would not let them say good-bye
To our team’s outstanding guy
Without even a decent try
Or an explanation why.
I would not let them make things worse
Without many a nasty curse.
I would not let Jer, Ken and Hahn,
I would not let them Obi-Wan.

Would you let them place a pox
Upon your favorites, the Sox,
Would you trust them to have made
An intelligent player trade?
Would you let them sign an agent, free,
Knowing they’d do it intelligently?

I would not let them place a pox
Upon my favorite team, the Sox,
I would not trust that they could make
A trade that’s not a big mistake,
I would not let them sign any man
Because they have no rational plan.
I would not like them in a dream
I would not like them on my team
I would not let them run the draft
For that would be extremely daft
I would not let them say good-bye
To our team’s outstanding guy
I would not let them make things worse
Without many a nasty curse.
I do not trust Jer, Ken or Hahn,.
I do not like them, Obi-Wan.

You do not like them, so you say,
Try them ! Try them! And you may,
Try them and you may, I say.

I have tried them, for too many years,
And they always justify my fears,
I wish all three would be far gone,
They’ve killed our team, Obi-Wan.

.

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