First things first, Happy Home Opener, everyone! Let the rain hold off and the runs rain down.
And what an upper released before the game ... it really does seem like Liam Hendriks will be seeing us at the ballpark sooner than later:
A special message from Liam Hendriks: pic.twitter.com/kSE1bjBkZD— Chicago White Sox (@whitesox) April 3, 2023
If you can into the ballpark, of course.
current line outside Gate 2 at Guaranteed Rate Field pic.twitter.com/zbrdFR91g3— CHGO White Sox (@CHGO_WhiteSox) April 3, 2023
Still in line pic.twitter.com/NQpAWOBtex— Ali White Sox (@aliwhitesox) April 3, 2023
Then again, stuck watching the game from the parking lot in the rain or not, some of us are sad not to be there.
To everyone headed to 35th & Shields today: #OpeningDay pic.twitter.com/td49YM9kZk— Lenford “Lenny” Leonard (@Leonard42) April 3, 2023
Weird, A.J. Pierzynski DRAGGING the White Sox in the ALDS seemed only to be, like, two years ago?
We got an A-lister on the show! @aj_pierzynskiFT pic.twitter.com/hpa9ZXo73Z— White Sox Talk (@NBCSWhiteSox) April 3, 2023
Speaking of the parking lot:
#TheVibe #WhiteSox pic.twitter.com/jzUzQZAko9— Sox In The Basement (@SoxInTheBasemnt) April 3, 2023
Going to pin this for later on the game, sorry Lenny.
Kopech is gonna kick some ass today I see. pic.twitter.com/Rk4NPlY2Mw— Lenford “Lenny” Leonard (@Leonard42) April 3, 2023
After Kopech deiverSorta rich a Cubs fan is issuing this edict ... but Merk’s not wrong.
Side note: There is no reason to ever throw back a home run ball--unless a new rule comes into existence that it will take the run off the board.— Scott Merkin (@scottmerkin) April 3, 2023
We interrupt this Bird App for a cranky old man take (yes, both subject and writer!):
Kirk Gibson: “There are a ton of moments in general where you need to give each team the opportunity to think things out and plot through rough seas. Baseball has always been that way. It should be allowed to be that way.” https://t.co/cMRedeLi0X— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) April 3, 2023
I mean, it’s spoiler alert, it’s going to get a lot uglier, so let’s enjoy this possible lone highlight of the game:
Give Luis Robert Jr. the Gold Glove. pic.twitter.com/ZjPaNMyjz4— White Sox Talk (@NBCSWhiteSox) April 3, 2023
Hey look, it’s fellow Bird App Recapper Jacki Krestel Wonder if she ever got inside the park.
Hi frens pic.twitter.com/0XtKeizCgz— jacki (@zombie_jacki) April 3, 2023
We have reached the “helpful tips to save the game” portion of the blowout:
Has Ethan Katz tried unplugging Michael Kopech and plugging him back in again?— ACAB includes Paul Vallas (@TheTyronePalmer) April 3, 2023
Has he tried putting Kopech in rice?— ACAB includes Paul Vallas (@TheTyronePalmer) April 3, 2023
Alas, not to be.
Live look at the Katz lab pic.twitter.com/pyzLrhpAaX— Kindableu (@kindableu) April 3, 2023
No Tom, not when the cheese slices are halving the plate.
He's gotta be tipping.— Tweet Sox (@WriteSox) April 3, 2023
cc: Di Billick
Someone who reads lips, let me know if Katz told Kopech to stop giving up home runs. Thanks.— White Sox Twitt3r (Is Baby Hippo) (@SoxTwitt3r) April 3, 2023
Droll. But appropriately so.
Michael Kopech has allowed five homers today, four in the last 10 minutes or so. Jake Diekman just got up in the White Sox bullpen.— James Fegan (@JRFegan) April 3, 2023
Tom and Adrian are working overtime, generating pocket sched heds for a second print run:
The 2023 Chicago White Sox: https://t.co/7c3rfmB4rk— White Sox Twitt3r (Is Baby Hippo) (@SoxTwitt3r) April 3, 2023
If you are asking, hey Brett, Michael Kopech has hardly started any games in his career, how does he already own three four-homer games, that can’t be real! Well, Mark scanned the media guide and has some bad news for us:
Kopech gave up four home runs to the Twins on July 25 of last year in a 6-2 loss. He gave up four to the Tigers on Sept. 5, 2018 but underwent Tommy John surgery shortly after that start.— Scott Merkin (@scottmerkin) April 3, 2023
Oh wait! You want information on FIVE-homer games? Hey Kamka, make yourself useful.
5 HR allowed in a game— Christopher Kamka (@ckamka) April 3, 2023
White Sox history
Eddie Lopat 4/23/1947 at DET
Reynaldo López 7/27/2018 vs TOR
Michael Kopech today vs SF
Sad to say, there’s not much more to say. This was as bad as a home opener as you could experience as a White Sox fan. The White Sox play six of their next eight games on the road. The offense turned back into a pumpkin. eat arbys