Chicago White Sox Since We Last Met: Kansas City Royals

The September rematch of the two worst teams in the worst division in baseball is finally upon us! Please dear reader, please try to temper the overflow of unbridled enthusiasm! Awaiting Kansas City’s arrival at Sox Park this week with baited breath for the fourth and final meeting of these two baseball juggernauts is totally and completely understandable. Exciting times are finally upon us once again! Pedro! Kansas City! AGAIN!

I just know you haven’t yet completely tuned out and are overly eager to pack the park to watch the archetypal blueprint of baseball mastery that will surely be on display at 35th & Shields this week.

Don’t.

Even.

Lie.

…

Our apologies, the person in charge of regulating the enthusiasm emitter has been sacked. We will strive to never let such rogue elements gain access to the pages of this blog again.

With those unpleasantries settled, let’s get back to the preview of this scintillating baseball matchup.

If you are asking yourself ‘didn’t we just do this?’ Fear not, the answer is yes. Although most would like to enthusiastically memory-hole the K.C. series loss from one short week ago, it, unfortunately, happened, and no, nothing has changed between these two awful teams over the past week. The Royals managed to temporarily climb out of baseball’s cellar with that series win against the Pale Hose, and the South Siders proved their uncanny ability to find new lows is simply unmatched across the baseball landscape once again.

What Have the Royals Been Up To?

After thoroughly outplaying our White Sox in two of three of the series just last week, including a game that ended in a walk-off balk (yes), the Royals faced off with the Toronto Blue Jays north of the border. Seems beating actual major league teams proves to be much more difficult than beating up on headless-chickens-flailing-about on the baseball diamond, or whatever other metaphor you’d like to use for what barely passes as professional baseball in the AL Central.

The White Sox and Royals remain the dregs of baseball with mere weeks remaining in the 2023 season. Looking at the stats for both teams makes the stomach churn at best, and provokes an impulse to pour bleach in one’s eyes. I don’t recommend the latter by any means. Just spare yourself the trouble an trust that anything written here would be more effort than either of these teams deserve at this juncture. I don’t long for the end of the baseball season, but I will not miss the 2023 version of the White Sox. At least the 100-loss Royals have a sliver of hope that their young talent might blossom in the near future with more seasoning. The same cannot be said for the South Side baseball team ...

What Are the Pitching Matchups? How Do We Match Up?

Both of these pitching staffs feature a team ERA+ 10 points below average, and both feature abysmal team WHIPs and FIPs. If you haven’t already tuned out after five months of miserable baseball, now might be a good time ...