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Dude, where’s my offense?

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South Side Sox Bird App Recap: Tamed by the Tigers

Swept by mediocrity

By Adrian Serrano
/ new

Luis is back!

Luis is not back.

THE HITS JUST KEEP COMING TODAY.

Tim Anderson leads off the Sox half of the first with a double and a milestone.

Followed up directly by a first inning bunt attempt?

Pedro.

Come on.

Eloy bails out his skipper with a two-out RBI single, and it’s 1-0, Sox.

Elvis Andrus with the outfield version of a seeing-eye single makes it 2-0, Sox.

José Rodríguez is pretty fun to watch in games he is actually allowed to appear in.

#OldFriendAlert

Michael Kopech: Big walk guy, walks the leadoff man.

Michael Kopech: BIG walk guy, walks the next man as well.

Why do they always give these guys those ugly benches made out of bats?

Both walks come around to score on a Carson Kelly double, and Kopech’s day is over, at just 44 pitches.

Bad enough they have had a better team and record most of the year, 2023 just keeps getting darker for these White Sox.

Another former White Sox player enters the playoff race.

Hit No. 2,000 coming right up!

Andrew Benintendi swings and pops out, worse than the failed bunt attempt to end the second, and we’re all tied at 2-2.

Michael Kopech might be broken:

Haven’t thought about this before, and I don’t know; seems bad that it’s in play, though.

Not sure what team Steve Stone has been watching this year.

Tied 2-2 after three innings, time for a timeline cleanse.

Also, I miss Liam.

He is here for the #culture.

Tanner Banks with 2 1⁄3 innings of relief with fewer pitches, runs, and walks than Kopech had — and also more strikeouts.

Which one is in the rotation, again?

Alright, this is pretty cool, White Sox.

The 2023 White Sox, ya’ll!!!

Bryan Shaw is to Pedro Grifol as Jimmy Cordero is to Ricky Renteria.

Only REAL fans are left at the stadium these days.

Jimmy Lamborghini had a deflated tire, Bryan Shaw cleans it up, and it remains 2-2 through five innings.

Trayce Thompson with a beautiful diving catch for the #culture.

Eloy Jiménez with a leadoff double, but ends up stranded at third on a Trayce Thompson strike out for the #culture.

Aaron Bummer enters, and the tied ballgame leaves: Spencer Torkelson with a 436-foot bomb for the lead, and it’s 3-2, Tigers.

Bummer walks the leadoff man in the eighth and is replaced by very real, and certainly not made-up pitcher, Lane Ramsey.

Real boy Ramsey gets himself into a real jam, but wriggles out without any damage, and it remains 3-2, Tigers heading into the ninth.

At least someone is having a good time.

Oh boy, this one is painful.

THE. HITS. KEEP. COMING.

Turns out Santos was healthy and very much alive in his 1-2-3 ninth inning.

Last chance for the Sox with Moncada, Andrus, and Thompson in the bottom half.

Tigers bobble away one double play ball, but turn a nifty one to end things on the South Side.

Let’s do it all again tomorrow in Kansas City.

Poll

Who had the tweet of the night?

This poll is closed

  • 46%
    @pixelhalloffame (Lineup w/o luis)
    (7 votes)
  • 33%
    @MESanders (Bummer’s new profession)
    (5 votes)
  • 0%
    @JeffBartlett85 (Death and Taxes)
    (0 votes)
  • 20%
    @zombie_jacki (Toncer Sperkelson)
    (3 votes)
15 votes total Vote Now
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